To think I am a bad mum or just an ill mum

[Dollymixtureyumyum]

DH is away and I am having a fibromylagia flare up after having salmonella.
My house is a tip after Ds had dystroyed it bit by bit and I do not have the strength to pick up after him. I having dragged myself into work the last two days and am now in agony and so tired. I feel like I am being stabbed in my wrists and ankles.
Please asure me that Ds will survive in a untidy house for two more days with toys all over and an unswept kitchen floor and he will not have long term effects of having biscuits for breakfast because I do not have the strength to argue and nearly wall to wall telly and I pad.

Your not a bad Mum your really ill and I hope your Mum does help and doesn't say anything horrible.Has she ever been really ill herself?

I have days where my health is so bad that I can't even move,one time I had 2 weeks that I was nil by mouth even holding in cold boiled water was near on impossible.

But my disabilitys and illnesses(I became ill and then disabled a year after having our 5th DC)don't stop me loving my 5DC and wanting the best for them and at the end of the day OP that's all that matters and you can tell from your posts that you really love your son and what the best for him so your being a better Mum and parent than alot of people who's children I worked with in the past and those parents had no health problems.

If you are worried because you are giving biscuits for breakfast exceptionally, then you are a VERY GOOD MUM!

It's fine, they enjoy it and you rest. Mine have survived on chocolate biscuits, mini babybel, bananas and chocolate for a couple of days! Once I had a bad flu thing, and was feeling so faint I had to crawl on the floor during the worst days as I couldn't stand up, another time I had a nasty D&V. Miraculously, they did not catch either, I only focused on giving them enough fluid, changing nappies and giving them enough food to keep them happy.

It's fine. That's the beauty of giving kids a very healthy diet, they can eat rubbish for a day when needed without any harm!

Thanks everyone. You have made me feel
So much better. DH had just rung and asked if I needed him home, I said I would
see how I go. He gets home tomorrow lunch time and has said I can go to bed and basically stay there till Monday morning. My mum has been ill at times but always a lot worse then anyone else when she is
Her parents never did anything to help and only ever had my brothers for one night when my mum was having me. Her dad my grandad was verbally abusive and even hit her across the face a few times, him and my grandma put my uncle on a pedestal because he was a boy and my mum was left to do everything. She was not allowed to go to college or learn to drive and until she got married had to hand her wage over. She said she can never remember her mum or dad hugging her, when she got married my grandad and her sat in silence all the way to the church and he nevr

Sorry posted before I had finished
Never spoke to her at all. When she started her period she thought she was dying and my grandma had never told her about them, she just got thrown a towel and told it would happen every month and to make sure she kept her legs together.
The night before her wedding my grandma said "don't worry about your wedding night close your eyes and it will be over before you know it"
So I can kind of understand she is why she is

Omg that's so awful OP. Feel bad for your mum.

I'm poorly today (chest infection, UTI, upset stomach, basically after several weeks of intense work stress my entire body appears to have gone on strike) and will be alone with DD (2) until DH gets in at some point between 7 and 8pm.

I have given myself permission to have a lazy day and decided that, within reason, normal rules and routines can be relaxed temporarily. So DD and I are both still in pyjamas (and may be for the rest of the day depending on how I feel), we will not be leaving the house today, lunch will be something on toast followed by fruit, dinner will probably be a takeaway or whatever I can cobble together from the freezer and snacks will be anything that I can plonk in front of her with minimal preparation, Cbeebies has been on since we came downstairs and if it stays on all day I couldn't give a fiddlers fart. I certainly won't be attempting any sodding housework.
I don't think I'm a bad Mum, I'm just ill and exhausted and I have a suspicion that it's constantly worrying about not being good enough (at home or at work) and always pushing myself to do more that has led to me getting so poorly in the first place. Over the last few weeks I have realised that while I'm good at taking care of other people, I am utterly useless when it comes to taking care of myself and that this needs to change.

OP, you're a good Mum. Holding down a job and taking care of a family while living with a chronic illness is bloody hard. Give yourself a break and don't accept visits from anyone who is going to make you feel inadequate under the guise of being 'helpful'.

I hope you feel better soon