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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask someone to move their child out of my plane seat

1000 replies

kipperssippers · 13/01/2016 20:00

more of a WWYD then AIBU but...
i booked the seat by the window as i always do and when i got to my seat a child around 8 was in my seat with her mum beside her.
When i got there i told the mother that the window seat is my seat and she said her child wanted the window seat to look out, i then replied then you should of booked one.
I didnt want to cause a scene but the women made out i'm an arsehole for asking her kid to move as she had never been on a flight and wanted to look outside.
I did give in and stayed pissed off for 7 hours in my non window seat.

what would you of done in this situation?

OP posts:
CrazyOldBagLady · 13/01/2016 23:00

I would've given up my seat in this scenario, just to let the child have a nice experience. If it was my money and not work's money, I might have to think twice!

Funinthesun15 · 13/01/2016 23:01

lost it is a British thing isn't it? My family is from a different European country and they're so much kinder to children. I knew it wasn't just me lol

You have no idea where other posters are from!

Stop using sweeping generalisations like you did on your own thread

clam · 13/01/2016 23:01

Lurked "but how does it work when two children used to having the world revolve round them meet and clash?"

As a primary school teacher, I'm here to tell you that it's carnage - and we're dealing with more and more of it these days, thanks to attitudes like this mother on the plane. And cats'.

janethegirl2 · 13/01/2016 23:01

Just put up and shut up if you need to live in the UK. It's a good country but I'm getting a bit pissed off with people thinking they can change it by whinging.
If the system requires you to book a seat to get what you want, do it, but please stop moaning and expecting everyone else to be inconvenienced because you can't be arsed to plan ahead.

TheCatsMeow · 13/01/2016 23:01

Roussette I don't think it's the nicest place because personally I think the culture is unfriendly and cold.

It's not entitled. Look at countries like Italy. People will stop and chat to you, here in a crowd people will deliberately avoid eye contact and try not to be friendly and helpful.

Does my head in

lostoldlogin2 · 13/01/2016 23:02

Cats It IS a British thing. I am British and I definitely notice how much kinder people in Catalunya are to my son. Some people were kind in the UK but we also encountered way more horrid snippiness as displayed on this thread. People behaving in a very insular, "I'm all right Jack and so is my little family" kind of way. Similar vein to people getting all vexed about old ladies cooing at their toddles as if they are about to shapeshift into evil monsters desperate to harm their little darlings at any moment Hmm

I see that the OP did give up her seat - sure - so I apologise for making that error. However the general feeling seems to be that her "rights" and having paid for the seat (how much, by the way? 15 quid to select your own seat, more or less?) were so very important and that the mother was being "entitled" and a load of other guff when actually - this is a complete non event. A little child was on a plane for the first time, and the mum asked another passenger if she would let the kiddy have the window seat so she could enjoy marvelling at her first experience of flying.

But apparently, the prevailing attitude here would have been "THAT'S MINE. NO".

Jesus.

CantChoose · 13/01/2016 23:02

Maybe. And they don't know what's going on in our lives either - the support I provide my DH when flying as gets anxious and my joint problems which mean I have to constantly change position and annoy anyone who sits next to me... They were actually completely fine with my polite refusal of their polite request and we had a lovely chat later on in the flight. As I said before, had I been travelling alone I would have moved without hesitation.
When I was a child I was allowed to sit in the flight deck with my mum for a whole flight as it was overbooked and there were no seats together :) pretty sure that isn't allowed any more!

TheCatsMeow · 13/01/2016 23:03

I don't think the world revolves around my child. But I do think adults getting in a power struggle with a child for bloody mindedness is stupid and petty

ilovesooty · 13/01/2016 23:03

I don't see why the OP's employer should have had to stand the cost of pandering to the child of this entitled mother.

apricotdanish · 13/01/2016 23:04

Some of you obviously can't fucking read can you

Is that your idea of nice then?!

Lurkedforever1 · 13/01/2016 23:04

Think I've met cat on second thoughts. I once had a very entitled family try and insist dd (age 7/8 then) and I move to separate seats so their entire clan could sit en masse with their darling dc who would be upset otherwise.

expatinscotland · 13/01/2016 23:04

And we get these nasty foreigners who act like twats on the train and block the exit with their buggy because I have a child, you know!

TheCatsMeow · 13/01/2016 23:05

Lost People behaving in a very insular, "I'm all right Jack and so is my little family"

That's exactly what I'm getting at but very badly Smile

"this is a complete non event. A little child was on a plane for the first time, and the mum asked another passenger if she would let the kiddy have the window seat so she could enjoy marvelling at her first experience of flying.

But apparently, the prevailing attitude here would have been "THAT'S MINE. NO". "

It makes me so sad people are like that

Roussette · 13/01/2016 23:05

What tosh! There are millions of lovely friendly people in England. It's not cricket Grin to come on to an english forum (your words not mine) and start running down the English.

janethegirl2 · 13/01/2016 23:05

Cats children are not the centre of the universe, but you choose not to get it.

Entitled brats will not grow into well developed considered adults

RockinHippy · 13/01/2016 23:05

YADNBU, BUT I would not have given in either.

The mother should have booked in advance as you did, her arsey blame you, instead of taking responsibility for her poor organisation, attitude would have really riled me. I would have said no more though & spoken with cabin crew, why waste breath on such ignoramuses

TheCatsMeow · 13/01/2016 23:06

Wow. Calling me a "nasty foreigner" is a bit uncalled for Hmm

ilovesooty · 13/01/2016 23:06

And people who are so nice they have no qualms about telling people to use other doors and possibly miss their stop.

lostoldlogin2 · 13/01/2016 23:06

and Cats I too agree that Britain is not the nicest place and the culture is unfriendly and cold in comparison to many other countries.
However, Britain is DESPERATELY proud of itself and seems to think that everyone in the world is clamouring to live there Hmm

Luckily - I don't have to, so I don't. I read so many threads on mumsnet and think "that would be a total non issue here, thank god I moved"

TheCatsMeow · 13/01/2016 23:06

Stop calling children brats. What a horrible thing to say. Allowing children the magic of childhood does not spoil a child.

Roussette · 13/01/2016 23:08

The child was 8! The mother let the child sit in the OP's seat without asking. She then had a tantrum when the OP tried to say it was her seat.

There would never be a power struggle between an adult and a child. It's the child's parents responsibility and the one who demands.

Lurkedforever1 · 13/01/2016 23:08

Exactly clam. And when precious gets all upset their little classmates won't pander to them, mummy decides they are all horrible.

thelouise · 13/01/2016 23:08

Lots of people are insular and "I'm alright jack". I can give a good example that I only read about yesterday; blocking a train exit with a buggy, despite there being 2 adults with said buggy. Wink

expatinscotland · 13/01/2016 23:09

Oh, I said we get 'nasty foreigners'. If I had meant you, I'd have named you.

I prefer referring to children as 'little shits' rather than 'brats'. 'Brats' is too soft.

clam · 13/01/2016 23:09

But an adult wasn't getting in a power struggle with a child. It was the child's mother who had the conversation.

Cats Why do you not think the child's own mother was responsible for her enjoyment of the flight?

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