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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is it too much homework?

64 replies

Esmeismyhero · 12/01/2016 09:33

Ds is 5 and in reception. He is doing really well but still doesn't have a great attention son etc.

His homework and reading homework at getting on top of him though.

He has 5 or more pages of writing and phonics to do a week, then they have a reading book and a phonic book on a Monday and it's changed on a Friday so that's 4 books to do reading in.

Then they have a game like phonics cards each night to do as well.

I have a record book I need to write this all in etc which is fine.

My dh and I read to the dc every night and we do reading at weekends etc but I feel this is a bit too much homework for a reception child.

By the time he has come home from school, had his dinner, bath and then homework he is shattered and he goes to be at about 7pm otherwise I wouldn't get him up in the morning.

Maybe IABU but is that too much?

OP posts:
Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 12/01/2016 10:29

I didn't know it would be this much, I was naive I guess and thought excellent ofsted reports just meant it was a good school etc iyswim.

I hadn't even heard the term hot house until this thread.

OP posts:
TannhauserGate · 12/01/2016 10:41

That's the kind of thing my children would have done in class tbh, they never had to bring anything like that home.
Some reception children won't be five for another six months. I think you have to be guided by your child- if he's tired, or needs downtime, then you forget the homework, and if that happens every day, then so be it. A child that is tired or stressed isn't receptive to learning. Playing Lego or simple board games will do loads to relax him, help his fine motor skills, and social skills, far better for him after a busy day at school. Even with my Y5 child I sometimes say 'no homework!' if she's too tired. She'll stomp about how it has to be in, but I know her, and I know when she's had enough. School know we're completely behind them 100% when it comes to home learning and supporting our children at home, but they understand that we know our children and know when a break is needed. They also know we'll make them catch up when they're back on firm again.

TannhauserGate · 12/01/2016 10:44

*on form!

fredfredgeorgejnrsnr · 12/01/2016 11:11

There's no evidence that reception homework helps academic achievement.
There's no evidence that knowing more words or maths helps academic achievement.

There is evidence that aerobic fitness helps academic achievement.
There is evidence that working memory helps academic achievement.

So if you're doing simple maths/words homework in preference to exercise or games that exercise and train working memory, you are, with the current state of evidence harming academic achievement.

What a waste of both of your time, all that opportunity to do fun things you've lost out on.

Gileswithachainsaw · 12/01/2016 11:16

That Is far far far too much.

poor kids :(

when are they supposed to go out and play

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 12/01/2016 11:18

Don't get me wrong, I have left the homework and been told off and I don't want ds to be known as the kid that doesn't do his homework etc.

It was the same with the nativity, seriously they didn't nearly 6 performances of it at school then one in the church, then they wanted him back st 6pm for another nstivity play and I refused, he was shattered. The teacher wasn't impressed and school secretary suggested I start putting him to bed later so he can do these extra activities.

Ds wants to do karate, which he did but then stopped because I couldn't fit it all in, the same with rugby tots on a weekend because he just wants to relax after his homework.

Thinking about it I KNOW dd is not going to be able to do the amount of homework, she's still shattered after 3 hours of nursery and ballet lessons.

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 12/01/2016 11:19

6 performances ? Shock

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 12/01/2016 11:24

Yup 8 in total. It was a fab play but by the end I was like no!

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 12/01/2016 11:30

Sounds bloody awful to me tbh.

we only did 2 performances. one dress rehearsal which the school watched and one for parents, both in school hours.

kids were tired even then.

they sound obsessed with how they look to others. kids don't seem to matter.

wigglesrock · 12/01/2016 11:30

My youngest is in P1 (she's 4). Every Monday, she gets homework. This week it's to practice shaping/writing whatever letter they're learning - this week it's f - she practices the letter, then colours in a picture of a fish. She has to find the number 3 in the house, then draw a picture of 3 characters from a book (3 little pigs/Goldilocks and the 3 pairs, 3 Billy Goats Gruff). She has a game to play with a deck of cards and a book home to read with her.
She gets it all on a Monday and it's to be in on a Friday morning.

SunnySomer · 12/01/2016 11:33

Really, I think you already realise it's too much. You need to decide what to do about it.
Would you be able to transfer him elsewhere?
There is a huge amount more to child development than writing and maths - sport, play, music and above all relaxation and sleep. If your child doesn't have enough downtime his brain won't be able to properly absorb all that he is learning.
My DS is at his second primary school. Both have outstanding Ofsted ratings and are "desirable" schools in nice areas (different areas). Neither have anything like this amount of homework - even in Y4, but both seem to produce rounded individuals with a knowledge of the wider world, an enjoyment of sport, drama and music AND good SATS results.

DisappointedOne · 12/01/2016 11:40

My youngest is in P1 (she's 4).

Are you in Scotland?

wigglesrock · 12/01/2016 11:48

No - NI

TannhauserGate · 12/01/2016 11:57

They suggested putting him to bed later? Shock
A 5yo that is tired shouldnt go to bed later, what is the matter with them?
You've had him for five years, you know his limits. Keep reading with him- that's going to have the biggest effect on his literacy, not five pages of hw each week.
Have you asked any other parents how their children are managing?

jelliebelly · 12/01/2016 12:08

You need to really consider if this is the right school. That is way too much - kids should be out doing fun things like the rugby tots you mentioned not stuck inside doing homework at 5yo!!

Mine both go to a good private school and had nowhere near this. Dd is in y2 and apart from reading every night and spelling/times tables weekly we get no more.

This will only get worse as each year goes by / that's how they weed out what they see as the weaker kids!

jelliebelly · 12/01/2016 12:09

Meant to add that number of performances for a play at any age is just bonkers!

vladthedisorganised · 12/01/2016 12:16

It seems to be more and more common these days. DD's school only gave reading and the occasional 'talk homework' in Reception, but Y1 has really stepped up to mad levels IMO.

Do the school 'recommend' an amount of time for the children to complete the homework? I found it took the pressure off when I stuck rigidly to the 10 minutes that was 'recommended' for DD to complete hers - even though she'd have to be extraordinarily fast to learn all her spellings, write eight sentences showing the use of the spelling words, in her best cursive and showing how best to use sentence connectors most effectively. If one sentence takes 10 minutes to do, that's all we do that night and I'll put a note in to that effect.

GlitteringJasper · 12/01/2016 12:24

Homework is not compulsory.

At our school there is a policy on homework so if it takes longer than a certain amount of time, depending on age, parents are instructed to leave it and just write a little note for the teacher.

Homework should not interfere with children's precious family time.

Reading, spellings, number facts take priority.

Just don't do it, if it takes too long.

MrsHathaway · 12/01/2016 12:47

My reception child is at an Ofsted Excellent school with truly outstanding EYFS provision. It is two or three times oversubscribed in an area where most schools aren't full.

Last week his homework was: fill in the missing capital letters in this alphabet and bring in a cereal box because we're going to be building a castle. They ask that we read three times a week.

I'm appalled that a 5yo is going to bed exhausted without even having the time to do a bit of sport. I'm also appalled that you are being "told off", however casually, if the homework doesn't get done.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 12/01/2016 12:55

I've spoken to a few mums and it's very much "oh no dc has always been fab at academia" etc.

Sad
OP posts:
TannhauserGate · 12/01/2016 14:09

Reception children are fab at academia?Grin I'm guessing they don't know what it means?

Out of interest, where were you educated? I'm guessing you probably weren't even in formal schooling at this age? I hope you're feeling reassured a little that this isn't usual, even in pushier schools.

fredfredgeorgejnrsnr · 12/01/2016 14:10

Did you speak to them in the context of "how do you find the time for the homework? Me and EsmeJr are always wanting to go out to the forest for a run of an evening?" As that sounds more like a response to difficulty of the work than how the time is found, although you're always going to struggle with time with your child being right at the top of the range of sleep needs.

You should also ask the school how homework is differentiated to meet the needs of the individual, some kids could do that homework solo, others couldn't do it at all.

Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 12/01/2016 15:50

fredfred believe it or not ds doesn't have as hard a homework as some other dd. My dsis dd is in the same class as ds and get much more complicated homework such as sentence building etc

OP posts:
Original poster
Esmeismyhero · 12/01/2016 18:47

Well I haven't made ds do his homework this evening, he has played and watch tv etc. Dh has just got home, I've said he hasn't done the homework and apparently that's not good.

Me: "ds gets too much homework, he was tired and didn't want to do it so I said that's ok"
Dh: "that's life esme, he gets hardly anything"
Me: "he gets 5 pages a week, plus game, plus reading"
Dh: "it's a good school for a reason"
Dh: "ds your doing the homework tomorrow"

Me: Angry

OP posts:
MrsHathaway · 12/01/2016 18:54

It's a good school because it makes parents do half the teaching and ensures they have time for nothing but got housing?

That ain't my definition of a good school.

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