To think Dry January is not all it's cut out to be?

[Throwingshade]

Ok I've only done a week (obviously as it's only a week into Jan!).

I feel fine, not struggling.

I drink a lot usually - 4 bottles of wine a week, then the odd blow out if we've got a party or dinner etc. So probably three times recommended limits? Not good.

I don't feel any different. Sleeping 'better' but only as in more heavily. But otherwise feel the same as before.

I'm going to carry on as need to change my drinking habits on a permanent basis. I'm an old bird and I don't want to create unnecessarily health problems so that my poor sons have to look after their old soak of a ma.

But anyone do a few weeks last year and feel a spring in your step, brighter eyes, brighter disposition?

I'm not asking all you peeps who don't really drink btw! I'm asking people who have a regular habit like me.

Ps I have been with dh for 25 years and we have two teenage boys. Sometimes I feel life's too short, I'm sick of this. Sometimes I feel I love our family unit, he is so many good things as well as shit things (aren't we all) and how could I ever end it?

Throwingshade that's scary. DH and I have been married nearly 18 years, a couple almost 23. We have two teenage DDs. DD1 is responding by being extremely anti-alcohol, DD2 tries not to think about it.

I actually can seen us not staying the course, unfortunately. I really can. It's a deal breaker for me.

That's good to hear Throwing (the feeling good part!)

Still I'm having ice cream every night! I NEVER eat ice cream. It must be my body missing all the sugar in wine?

Stop I'm on the CBB thread too, stone cold sober.

Sigh.

Well my plan, and I suspect yours, Pointy, is carrying on doing this for myself.

I feel good. I have a plan in place for after Jan that I feel I can go through with in terms of my own drinking to carry on feeling more uplifted and healthy.

Then I have to see where this takes me and my marriage and just have faith that things become clearer and come out in the wash eventually. Trying to stay positive really.

I'm doing dry January an was hoping to be springing out of bed bright eyed, cheery and bushy tailed by now! I'm OK though. I'm also secretly aiming to do a year. I am a heavy drinker and think I may need to stop permanently. Jason Vales book Kick the drink is a very good positive read. I was also aiming to eat healthily but not quite got there yet.

Thornrose, yes I was eating more puds last week but I've stopped now. Eating a bit more generally but the piggery is settling down!

Throwing I am absolutely doing this for myself. And the couch to 5K, and the ongoing not drinking during the week, all of it. Sometimes you just have to accept that you can't help someone. I don't know what will happen - somewhere in the back of my mind is the year 2021 when DD2 will be 18 and off to Uni and it will be just the two of us at home again - I think that will be crunch time if it does not come earlier.

I was also pigging the sweet stuff but it's calmed down now. I think I'm almost over the worst of the withdrawal/cravings.

I don't even drink that much. It's scary that giving up drinking has had me itchy, grumpy, greedy and spotty. These are proper withdrawal symptoms, I never really considered my drinking, which generally falls within the guidelines, to be enough to do this!

I did it, quite easily, was it last year or the year before. Didn't really see the benefits to be honest.

Everyone says there is, but I didn't SEE it.

Am doing it this year aswell. So far, so good.

Throwing and Pointy I feel similar about DHs drinking and also the role modelling for my DCs. I do not want their childhood memories to be of mum and dad drinking.
DH drinks a lot more than I do and smokes too. I feel so angry that he is not at all concerned about the impact health on his health. Like you I am very worried that I will be left dealing with the fallout for something self inflicted and I will find the 'in sickness and in health' vow hard to stomach if this happens.

I'm going to continue with Dry January in a bid to improve my own health. Someone has to be around for the DCs growing up.

Oh Shebird I feel the same! My h smokes too!

I feel like I've given up, I can't be arsed to wait for him to grow up. Right at this moment, with his bottle of red wine on the table beside him on the sofa, I don't give a fuck anymore.

I've been really quite unhappy but I'm making myself happier by the booze thing, going walking, hiking, eating better, keeping busy, seeing friends - I'm even going to the frigging ballet this weekend! Cheap tickets, never been before. I'm a bit of a heathen. Just want to get out do stuff, stop wasting my life glaring angrily at my drunken h

Oh and I do work FT by the way - I made it sound like my life's some montage in a movie!!

Teapot I didn't worry about overreating the first week as I obviously was craving sugar and carbs. You might find you can start eating healthily soon?

Exactly Throwing here's to less wasting on worrying and being angry and spending more time on living and self improvement.

Ballet is a good start

*heres to less wasting time

Yep I mean even if nothing improves with our h's, we ourselves will hopefully feel and look better and know we are doing something to safeguard our health for our kids.

I second and third everything you say, Throwing and shebird. I want to be around to see the girls grow up even if he apparently doesn't.

I'm doing DJ and finding it okay apart from I'm drinking gallons of tea and peeing like a horse, and stuffing my face with biscuits so will be astounded if I lose weight.

My DH is also a drinker and a smoker, but he doesn't have wine or spirits. He sticks to lager or cider and doesn't really get pissed. The dc pass comment more on his smoking but hell will freeze over before he gives up .

I think I'm going to keep going with the abstention in Feb too. Will try to stay off the booze until I'm actually out, rather than knocking it back in the house all too frequently.

Sorry to hear so many of you havng issues with oh. Luckily I don't have that with Dh. I'd say we are both moderate drinkers but moderate together. We have days off drinking together, share a bottle (or two at the weekends) of wine together, etc.

Anyhoo, finding it easy to abstain this month, but waiting for the benefits to kick in still. I feel so lethargic, I need the energy to find me. I am thrilled to be finding it easy, again I think it's because Dh has joined me in DJ for the first time and its helped he's not drinking in front of me.

I'm very tempted to continue into Feb.

I'm not doing DJ per se, but I am cutting my drinking down to one day a week, and I've cut out diet coke and caffeine.

I'm not missing the diet coke, or the booze (coz I have one day a week where I can have wine. Huzzah), but I am knocking back about 2L of still/fizzy water a day and peeing for England.

I do a month dry or longer several times a year. I'm not going to say I feel amazing but what I do find is that my training is better; my cardio fitness improves, I get stronger, I can lift heavier and longer and I don't get joint pain (I get sore muscles from training obvs)

So although I don't feel bright eyed and bushy tailed I can feel a positive effect on my body.

Well a little update especially for Pointy and Shebird

I had a REALLY big, rather awful, difficult talk with my dh.

He is now doing the final two weeks of Jan with me which has made me happy! It's only a gesture, and a trial, for now. But he really listened to me and he really seemed to at least fully understand my thoughts and concerns etc.

I am still doing well. Feel good! No temptation to drink in the slightest (remind me why I'm going to start drinking again in Feb )

And so another weekend begins.

Weekends are my danger zones.
I've stocked up on Schlur and Ice in preparation for week moments.

Yup hollow I could murder a Gin and Tonic right now.

Throwing that is a great start.

Progress at my end too - DH had his first bereavement counselling session on Thursday and it seems to have unlocked something in him. I haven't seen him so positive in about 6 months. The counsellor gave him a lot to think about, things that had not occurred to him but that chimed with his experiences. And that night he had about a third of what he usually has, was warm and chatty and himself in a way he has not been for a long time. He's definitely going back. I think he is right when he says that unprocessed bereavement (both parents in the space of 4 years) is at the root of much of his problems. It's as if a cloud has lifted. No miracles, but some good first steps.

Oddly enough that made me fancy wine for the first time in DJ. Am not caving though, first drink will be on the 5th of February.