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Original poster

To write a stroppy response to the "Amber attendance warning" received from Dd's high school?

166 replies

PingpongDingDong · 08/01/2016 22:19

Last term Dd had 4 teeth out for a brace. She had one and a half days off for this. A few weeks later she had the brace put on. She had one day off for this. She then had a migraine so another day off for that.

All authorised absences, all pretty much unavoidable. Today we received the above mentioned letter with all sorts of doom laden predictions for those without 100% attendance ending with "we trust your daughter will aim for excellent attendance this term."

Is it me?! She was having 4 teeth out and a brace fitted and she had a migraine (the school know this). I really object to this heavy handed, ridiculous approach for kids who do not have a "problem" with attendance. Should I write and complain?

OP posts:
AllMyBestFriendsAreMetalheads · 09/01/2016 19:06

YY jellyfrizz

Pingpong Even if you had taken her back she would have missed registration so it would still be an absence and wouldn't count in the stats so it would make no difference. I didn't go back to school after I had my braces fitted - it took a few hours to get used to everything that was now in my mouth!

fitforflighting · 09/01/2016 19:09

We have the same situation as someone mentioned above. I have offered to take dc to the orthodontist at 8am for the first appointment time meaning they will only likely miss form time but the school would rather they went after 9 meaning they miss a full lesson or half of one and half of another!

Groovee · 09/01/2016 19:14

I expected to get one of these last year. Dd needed 3 days of for surgery to remove a tooth in the roof of her mouth.

Then a week later she got an infected blood clot in the wound, so that was a morning at the emergency clinic, then a follow up a week later then another appointment at the orthodontist a week after that!

They put her down as medical for all so she was classed as having 100% attendance. They put her down for medical on her follow ups every 6-8 weeks.

CockwombleJeff · 09/01/2016 19:24

I don't care how authorities view my children - if the school see them as statistics that's fine - but for me they are people and I certainly won't take any crap off our school about attendance .
They can send as many shitty letters as they like because they will be getting letters back stating that first and foremost my children's physical and mental health trumps their attendance records.

jamdonut · 09/01/2016 19:27

I must be a bad mother then. I sent my son back to school after he had his brace fitted. And his elder sister when she had hers.!

But I did write and explain to the school before treatment started, for both of them, what was happening and how often appointments would be etc. Had absolutely no problems with school, and their absences were all authorised and didn't affect their attendance records.

Sofiria · 09/01/2016 19:30

BrianCoxReborn I'm really sorry for what you and your DD must be going through, and it really highlights how absurd and damaging these data-driven blanket policies are.

You've probably already heard this (and please don't feel obliged to tell me why it isn't an option for you, if it isn't - I'm writing on the small chance you might not have considered it already) but it might be an idea to deregister your DD from school and have her officially home educated so that she can focus on her mental health without the threat of attendance officers and the like.

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 09/01/2016 19:40

Ds misses a lot of school.

Asd appointments.
Podiatrists
Physio
Salt
Dietician

It's laughable if I could get these appointments in holiday times, when every other parents want the same thing.

I provide every letter to the school in which they photocopy and put it in a file and when eystyn inspected they was impressed that the headteacher had proof to explain low attendance.

SuburbanRhonda · 09/01/2016 20:02

These threads always run exactly the same.

A high percentage of posters think the school decides how to manage attendance. A small percentage think teachers send the letters out. Many many people think schools have autonomy in whether or not to evidence the measures they have in place to improve attendance.

I manage attendance in a primary school - believe me, I have much better things to do than have meetings with parents about their child's absence due to illness. And our office staff have much better things to do than print and send out these letters.

But we have to do it. At least in our school attendance awards are also given to children who would have had 100% attendance had they not been ill.

BishopBrennansArse · 09/01/2016 20:06

jamdonut - did your two children have four extractions at the same time the brace was fitted?

A bad parent would be one who sends their child to school when they wouldn't work under the same conditions. So if you're not prepared to get a fifth of your teeth extracted then merrily go to work then work it out...

tiggytape · 09/01/2016 21:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mistigri · 09/01/2016 21:08

BrianCox how awful for you and your DD :( I hope she is getting the help she needs.

My DD has some (much less serious) mental health issues which led to her missing some school at the end of last term (her attendance was probably under 95%). There is a high probability that we will need to keep her off in future, and that her psych appointments will sometimes fall during school hours. Fortunately she's not in a UK school ...

BrianCoxReborn · 09/01/2016 21:42

Thank you for your sympathy misti and Sofiria

CAMHS have been amazing. The teaching staff have been helpful in their desire to help get her back to school, even the LA attendance officer was a decent chap. It's the school AO who is an absolute bellend.

Having said that about the teaching staff, constant phone calls are just not helpful. We saw them (meeting with CAMHS) just before Christmas, CAMHS told them that DD would not be returning to school any time soon.

We had our routine therapy appointment booked for this week.

School went back on the 4th. I got a call on the 6th asking for an update Ffs.

There was no progress to report in 2 bloody weeks.

Home Education is not an avenue I want to go down, DD and I are too volatile in our relationship so it just wouldn't work. CAMHS have reassured me that as much as they may threaten court action (they haven't yet, it's me catastrophically) there isn't a court in the land that would take an LA's statistic based case over a psychiatric evaluation.

BrianCoxReborn · 09/01/2016 21:43

*Catastrophising

grannytomine · 09/01/2016 21:55

When my DD had her brace fitted she went straight back to school, I figured that sitting at home she would focus on it more. Maybe I'm heartless. When she had surgery, both jaws broken, moved and reset and wisdom teeth out on the Tuesday she was out at an 18th birthday party on the Saturday, after 3 days in hospital. As one of the nurses said, "It's not too bad, you did look like you'd been hit by a bus now you just look like you've been hit by a car." Mind you I didn't make her go to the party.

Original poster
PingpongDingDong · 09/01/2016 22:58

Good god tiggy I am past caring about it now! Thank you for your forensic analysis of my timings though. i think making a child go back into school for a PE lesson just after having a brace fitted and probably in pain and probably not having eaten much is beyond ridiculous.

As if it's actually going to make any difference to her in the long run. School is extremely important but if a parent of a child in my class returned them to school after painful dental work for the sake of 1 lesson I would think them a very heartless parent indeed.

OP posts:
Original poster
PingpongDingDong · 09/01/2016 23:01

Can I just add all of these absences WERE authorised! She had no unauthorised absences at all!

OP posts:
munkisocks · 09/01/2016 23:22

I had braces for 3 years (orthodontist made a mistake and I had to keep them on twice as long). I went for them tightening often and it was agony afterwards. Usually I would have half a day off school for it, either leaving early or going in late. Just ignore the letter it's pretty standard it seems.

redstrawberry10 · 09/01/2016 23:25

how did we get to this place? Someone's DD gets braces and needs a couple of days off and parents get sent nasty letters? What next? Leukemia only gets 3.5 days off, with a nasty note on day 4?

Schools and the government should back off.

tiggytape · 10/01/2016 00:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

frenchie12 · 10/01/2016 19:33

These new regulations get on my nerves. DD who at Secondary says that students are always being sent home ill as their parents are scared to keep them off due to the tightened up rules.

DD has had 8 days off with 2 viruses with temps and one ep of d+v and we got a letter to say her attendance was 88%. She is excelling at school, always works hard, behaves well and does all her homework on time whilst other kids have 100% attendance but piss about every lesson and don't do their work. Since she started primary she has never had a day off school for holidays when other kids took the full ten days every year.

Kids are just a figure these days and I can only see absence going up as parents continue to send their ill kids in with assorted bugs.

JoffreyBaratheon · 11/01/2016 15:51

I just spoke to the person responsible for sending out The Letter re my 13 year old. (91% attendance - he had 3 days off so far this year - with sickness bugs and the rest were all ortho appointments that he attended around 9 AM and was back on his way to school by 9:30.... (but two/three bus rides away depending on route). Totally got no joy. Apparently they are 'authorised' absences but "still count as absences". If he drops in an appt card when he gets back to school she "won't count it" despite the fact "it's an absence"... wtf? Well why not tell parents that in the first place? I told her I had been ringing constantly and telling reception where he was and that he'd be in late.... and they'd said "Fine". Am I fucking psychic? But how can a handful of ortho appointents (only one of which was an entire day off) come in at 91%, when he was usually in school by 10:30 anyway?

It's like talking to a robot. These school admin people are remarkably charmless and have zero phone manner, as well, or so it is at my kids' school.

AllMyBestFriendsAreMetalheads · 11/01/2016 16:22

It's because he missed morning registration, he was absent then, so as far as the school is concerned he's absent for the whole morning, even if he is back at 9:30. Schools would rather you took him into school to be registered, then take him for an appointment, even though your way means he actually misses less school time.

Because it isn't about time spent in school, it's just ticking boxes.

ludog · 11/01/2016 21:38

When I hear these stories I am very relieved that I live in Ireland. I really don't think I could cope with this level of unnecessary burocracy

JoffreyBaratheon · 11/01/2016 22:34

Yes, wish I lived in Ireland. It was like something from a Kafka novel "Yes they are authorised absences but they are still absences".

So why bother with the concept of 'authorised' absences if you count authroised and unauthorised as the same thing? And if you now expect kids to show the office an appt card - then why not inform parents that the school's policy has changed, rather than tell them on the phone "That's fine" - if it isn't? My kids have been at this school since 2001 (I have 5 kids and spaced in such a way I have always had kids at this school since then) and this was never an issue til last term.

redstrawberry10 · 12/01/2016 10:00

I really don't think I could cope with this level of unnecessary burocracy

You might explode in England. I think half our gdp is unnecessary bureaucracy.