Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Aibu to think they should

43 replies

BlueMoonRising · 07/01/2016 12:15

Stick around till I'm finished? I sat down with the kids this morning to do a craft activity. We all enjoy craft, and mil have I'd ask the same craft kit so we could do them together - we were doing ceramic painting.

The kids finished first, then rushed off to play something else together. Aibu to think they should have stayed with me for the additional 20 minutes it took me, as we were doing the craft activity as a family? DH thinks I am.

OP posts:

OohMavis · 07/01/2016 13:35

YABU, and a selfish cow.

Not really! lol jk.

unimaginativename13 · 07/01/2016 13:39

What's going on .... My brain is fried

Original poster

BlueMoonRising · 07/01/2016 13:40

Bored? Yes, possibly. Work isn't back to full capacity yet, so I'm twiddling my thumbs a bit today. It was inspired by a thread I was reading this morning though (although it's not about that thread) so it's not like I've been sitting contemplating it for months!

Fictitious mil was involved because I needed to explain the of the same craft sets, and she might as well be involved along with fictitious dh. Didn't want to involve DM, as she actually exists.

Love the snidey remark about it being a necessary interruption to the telly. I assume that poster is of the option that's how I regard mealtimes.

Funny. I don't have any means of even getting a TV signal in my house

OP posts:

PerspicaciaTick · 07/01/2016 13:41

I don't think craft is primarily a social activity. If the DCs were painting their own pots and you were painting yours, then it entirely possible that you took longer because you were working on a more intricate/complex design (working towards a more "professional" finish) than the children. I would assume that the majority of your attention would be focused on your activity, not socialising. Absolutely fair enough if the DCs go off and play.
The same if you spend an extra 20 minutes chewing slowly and fiddling with your cutlery - concentrate on what you are doing, don't make your eating/crafting the central activity while you hold court over captive relatives.
Waiting an extra few minutes while someone finishes up is different - but making people wait for you for more than 5-10 minutes is unfair.

MarkRuffaloCrumble · 07/01/2016 13:59

I think that in a crafty situation, everyone works at a different pace and so yes, if you are doing it really neatly and carefully and they're just racing to get it done, once the DCs are finished, they can go and do something else (plus I'd appreciate the peace and lack of wobbly table once they'd gone!)

At mealtimes, I think that it's polite to all sit down and wait to eat together and stay at the table until everyone has finished, but not entirely necessary every day. My DD takes aaaaages to eat and her DBs get bored waiting for her, so if they start being annoying and disruptive I tell them to go rather than taunting her about how slow she is and how much she still has left to eat!

I think there's a happy medium where they stay long enough to be sociable but don't get bored and restless. At a restaurant I would expect them to stay put unless there was a specific alternative (play area etc) in which case, again I'd appreciate a peaceful leisurely coffee while they bugger off rather than have them moan that they're bored.

Figwin · 07/01/2016 14:03

Well this seems like a load of attention seeking crap

Asskicker · 07/01/2016 14:13

Fictitious mil was involved because I needed to explain the of the same craft sets, and she might as well be involved along with fictitious dh. Didn't want to involve DM, as she actually exists

I think you are still taking the piss.

You didn't want to involve your mum on an anonymous forum, on a thread that is fictitious. Do made up a dh and mil to explain the craft kit?

Figwin · 07/01/2016 14:16

Asskicker there is no other way that story could have been told. How else does someone get craft kits and it was en essential part of the story where the fictitious craft kits came from

Also, if this was a meal situation, why would it take you 20 minutes extra to finish your meal? You must have people waiting all over the place for you

Arfarfanarf · 07/01/2016 14:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

BlueMoonRising · 07/01/2016 14:31

Arfarf, while it was inspired by your thread, it wasn't inspired by your comments :)

People that don't like the thread, move on. I was curious, so I asked the question. Got the answers.

In some way, aren't ALL threads attention seeking?? Nobody posts in order to get no response...

OP posts:

Original poster

BlueMoonRising · 07/01/2016 14:34

Asskicker, you seem to have an issue with mils. At no point in the story was the mil a problem, slagged off or otherwise demeaned. In fact she was the kind gifter of craft sets that were obviously appreciated as they were used by all parties.

I don't understand your problem with that. At all.

OP posts:

Arfarfanarf · 07/01/2016 14:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Asskicker · 07/01/2016 15:26

I don't understand your problem with that. At all

Yes, you must have got that where I accused you of making up a mil story so you could slag her off.

Oh that's right....I didn't.

I just don't get the need to include her in the story. I also don't get the reluctance to add your DM instead.

Original poster

BlueMoonRising · 07/01/2016 17:01

Well if it's not that, I can't see why it makes any difference to you whether it is a mil or a dm in the story.

OP posts:

user7755 · 07/01/2016 17:08

What an odd thread! [hmmm]

FWIW the two are in no way comparable, one is an activity to entertain your kids for a bit, where everyone is focussed on a task. The other is an opportunity for everyone the chance to sit down and share food and news.

And I don't understand where MIL comes into the equation.

Leelu6 · 07/01/2016 19:57

I'm annoyed at your sentence below, it makes no sense.

We all enjoy craft, and mil have I'd ask the same craft kit so we could do them together.

queenMab99 · 07/01/2016 22:31

My children were not expected to sit for ages, when small, they would ask politely 'please may I leave the table' when they had finished, and were allowed to go and play. As they grew up they would stay and be involved in the conversation. This seemed to work well and has carried on with grandchildren.

MerryMarigold · 08/01/2016 09:00

NownowBOno, at the fictitious sister/ wedding thread. Yes, I read this thread and the one about someone's ex wife getting mad that the new woman had been moved in days after she'd been moved out. Oh, and it was actually not a husband/ wife situation but 2 wives, and was just 'testing'. I didn't bother to respond on that one. It does seem to be becoming a 'thing' on AIBU (hopefully not for long).

This one I do think is a bit more fair enough.

Flip

1 2

Swipe left for the next trending thread