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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not keep all DC at home if their siblings are ill?

23 replies

livvielunch · 06/01/2016 12:49

My three preschool DC and I have a tummy bug but my 9 yo is so far fine. I was up pretty much all night last night and typically we all settled at around 6 am, then my alarm went off at 7. I got up and woke 9 yo, made her lunch, had a shower etc then woke the others and got them dressed before driving 9 yo to school. We were five mins late because of having to pull over because of two of her siblings being sick. I saw my friend on the way back to the car and she noticed the kids looked poorly so I explained that they were and she said she'd have kept 9 yo home too and stayed in bed and that if one of her dc is ill and off school she keeps the other one off too.

I know 9 yo will probably catch it but surely she'd end up missing loads of school if I kept her off every time her siblings are poorly? Or am I in the wrong and spreading illness unnecessarily?

OP posts:
BathtimeFunkster · 06/01/2016 12:50

YANBU

She's not sick. She might never catch this bug. She might have had it before.

Birdsgottafly · 06/01/2016 12:51

My middle DD never got what her two siblings had, so for Bugs/Viruses, I think it's fine.

I would always be cautious if it was a childhood illness, such as Chicken Pox/Scarlett Fever etc.

dementedpixie · 06/01/2016 12:52

No I wouldn't keep them all off but sounds like your younger ones are really quite poorly.

Artandco · 06/01/2016 12:59

Depends. In your senario i would have tbh as k don't think it's fair on the younger three to be taken out throwing up out of car doors. We also walk so would be children vomitting in the street everywhere.

I would send the other if someone could stay at home with the sick and another drop and collect other child like Dh or a friend.

If I felt ill and could pass out in the street with several puking pre schoolers alone then no I wouldn't bother. I would just call the school and explain that 4 out of 5 of us are ill/ sick, no way of getting the he last Non sick child in so I would be keeping them at home. At 9 years I would ask school to email over what work they are doing that day so they can get on with it alone at home, do some reading and writing or can research a topic for school themselves

PennyHasNoSurname · 06/01/2016 13:01

I wouldnt have kept the 9yp off, no. However Id have begged and pleaded someone to take 9yo to school to save dragging three ill preschoolers out.

IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece · 06/01/2016 13:06

In your current situation, If you couldn't get someone to drop the 9yo for you then I'd have kept her home.

That was incredibly unfair on the poorly ones to drag them out when they were poorly enough that you had to pull over for them to be sick. Not sure why you would do that tbh

inlovewithhubby · 06/01/2016 13:06

You are SOOOOO not being unreasonable. Your 9yo is much less likely to succumb if she stays away from the vomitorium. If you kept her off each time a sibling were ill, as well as when she is herself ill, you'd be reprimanded for poor attendance by the school. Parents can be so bloody precious - tell that woman to bog off!

BathtimeFunkster · 06/01/2016 13:07

Yes, I also would have made other arrangements for getting well child to school and not dragged sick littlies out.

inlovewithhubby · 06/01/2016 13:09

Those who wouldn't have dragged out little ones - anyone though that OP might not be thinking entirely straight because she's ill and had no kip? Well done for getting your daughter there at all and coping with the sick ones on the way. I'd applaud you rather than judge you.

inlovewithhubby · 06/01/2016 13:10

*thought not though

BathtimeFunkster · 06/01/2016 13:15

I'm not judging her, I'm just saying that I try to avoid bringing sick kids out in the car.

I think getting the 9 year old out of the house was a good call, but I wouldn't judge someone who kept her off due to the hassle of the school run with everyone sick.

cdtaylornats · 06/01/2016 13:18

Could be your 9 year old is infected already it just hasn't shown as symptoms. You could be infecting her whole class.

Saxons · 06/01/2016 13:19

Unfair to drag the little ones out. Should have got someone to take 9 year old in

livvielunch · 06/01/2016 13:20

If I'd had someone to take her to school I obviously wouldn't have taken the little ones out, but I didn't so it was all of us or none of us.

OP posts:
NotMeNotYouNotAnyone · 06/01/2016 13:21

Yes i think she should've not dragged thrill ones out BUT I agree with PP that OP's brain is probably frazzled and things she would've thought of on a normal morning won't occur to anyone who's been up all night and feeling like crap. Or she may not have had anyone who she could ask to help at such short notice.

Hope your littlies feel better soon and your eldest doesn't catch it Flowers

inlovewithhubby · 06/01/2016 13:24

She may have infected everyone in her class - er, she is asymptomatic. If parents kept their asymptomatic children off 'sick' the eduction system would grind to a halt. That is absolutely ridiculous.

Chattymummyhere · 06/01/2016 13:37

I would of sent the oldest in but got someone else to take them.

I did keep my preschooler off when my oldest had a leg injury which meant he wasn't allowed to bend his leg at all but I figured it was only preschool and although I could get the drop off done nobody would of been able to pick her up and it was only 2 days she missed.

MrsTedMosby · 06/01/2016 13:38

I probably would have kept her off. I did one day last year - 3 of mine had a sickness bug and so did I. The oldest took himself to school as usual but I couldn't get out of bed without feeling sick so the youngest stayed home with us.

They all normally have really good attendance so I dont think it matters that much.

tbtc20 · 06/01/2016 13:39

I think the most risky thing you did was drive on no sleep with all your children in the car.

But, in answer to your question, of course the 9 yo should go to school.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 06/01/2016 13:41

I would have sent 9yr old DD to school so long as she was well. It doesn't always follow that all siblings catch every bug.

However, I wouldn't have wanted to drag three pre-schoolers out when they were still at the vomiting stage of an illness (so really needing to stay asleep whilst they could).

In my case, DH would have dropped DD off at school & gone in to work a bit later. Or I would have begged my neighbour (the nice one) to let DD walk with her DCs to school.

I'm not sure what I'd do if I had absolutely no-one to call on & no DH to help a bit.

thelouise · 06/01/2016 15:45

YANBU. It would be ridiculous to keep a child off school because their sibling is ill. Your eldest has 3 preschool aged siblings and if you did that, I bet she'd never be at school!

RubbleBubble00 · 06/01/2016 16:02

Utterly mad to keep 9 yr old off. Wouldn't be first time iv bundled dc into car with sick bowls/buckets to drop others at school. (Old enough to drop at the gates)

RubbleBubble00 · 06/01/2016 16:03

Iv no dh to help as he works away and live a distance from school so I would have done same as op

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