To thinK that noise from small children is unavoidable when you live next door to them.

[ModreB]

DH and I live in a small semi with DH and DS2 and 3. DS1 lived here before he moved away for work. Up until last year, we had elderly neighbours, who never mentioned the noise from my DS's. Which I think was considerable, seeing we had 3 DS's who were normal boys playing in their own home. Elderly previous neighbours had children of their own who were grown up.

Last year, we got new neighbours with 3 small children. They are about 7yo, 3yo and less than 1yo. (From what I can see of the sizes.) We do talk but don't know each other IYSWIM.

So, during the day, they play, loudly. I find it fine, when I'm home. DS's say it disturbs them doing studying, sleeping etc. They (DS's) both work when not at school/college during non-holiday times from about 6am.

At bedtime next door kids play up, shout, scream, run up and down stairs, but I say to DS's they are kids. The parents talk loudly but don't yell or scream. Kids go to bed at about 9pm each night.

Overnight the youngest one cries a lot. I hear it and roll over. DH hears it and rolls over. I can tell that its not my DC crying. DS's hear it and complains that it wakes them up.

My point is, small children make noise. Their parents are far more invested than me in a good nights sleep. The parents are probably far more interested in non broken sleep than I am. I have said this to the DS's but they don't get it.

DS's should get over it as when they where they same age they were just as bad as next door.

So, live and let live or ask them to keep the kids down.

(Which I won't do but asking for opinions.)

Are you asking if your DSs are being unreasonable?

Yes, they probably are, if they were the same once upon a time.

Yes I am. The noise from next door is what I consider reasonable.

I expect children to be noisy yes however I do encourage them to do quiet play opposed to running around the house screaming.

They can play outside and jump and yell and shout.

Inside its play with your toys etc but no screaming around the house

For my sanity if no one else's

You are teaching them to be tolerant of others by reminding them that noisy children are a fact of life. And good on you for being patient!

Kids wake at night and often cry. Fact of life.
I wouldn't expect kids to play so loudly that neighbours could hear it!

We have just moved in to a very quiet little close and seem to have the only young children here. Our neighbours are whisper-quiet so I am conscious of encouraging DD1(3yrs) and DD2 (19mo) to not be too manic. Luckily they have good bedtimes so evenings are quiet, but they are early risers.

I truly don't want to terrorise the neighbours (and we are perfectly accepting of their dogs barking etc) so it's good to know that there are people out there who accept that kids won't always whisper and tiptoe. YANBU for telling your DSs to relax about it.

YANBU. I think your DSs need to get some ear plugs. If you ask them to keep the noise down all that will happen is the parents will be left feeling uncomfortable in their own home, and the noise would carry on.

My friends teen in our old road complained about the little ones next door making noise at bed time. She told her ds that she would go next door and say to them that he would be more than willing not to play Xbox between 9pm and midnight so as not to disturb her little ones sleeping next door and in return could she make them quieter for an hour each evening and move the baby to a different room when it cried

Ds decided he could put up with it

My neighbours kids scream a lot, they wake me in the night and I never get a lie in as the screaming starts at 7am. I am exhausted as i do shift work and really need my sleep ! I can hear them through wax ear plugs .. Sometimes I go to work after having a very broken night's sleep feeling unsafe to do tasks at work. I would never dream of saying anything because as pp says I don't want them to feel uncomfortable in their own home.

I enjoy hearing them play. DS3 plays musical instruments but not after next doors kids are in bed. And NEVER after 7pm. He actually said tonight they seem more quiet when he plays classical music. So maybe that's the way.