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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

About feeling very low about this week (redundancy)

29 replies

Janeymoo50 · 28/12/2015 19:20

New Years Eve is my last day at work. I feel very, very tearful about it. Have worked there for 26 years. If I'm honest the job is dull at times, awful manager and a 4.5 hour commute most days. But, I have never (luckily) been unemployed. I know the first week or so will probably be fun, no getting up at 5.15 and getting home at 8pm. But I just feel rotten, unwanted and worry I will never find another job (I am 51 and my current job is quite specialised and is all I've done since my mid 20's).

The payout is "ok", not massive but only about a years take home pay. My girlfriend is very supportive, says everything will be ok, she works full time and our mortgage is not horrendous. I just feel a bit, I don't know, worthless now. We were always equal, joint income before tax about 42k.

I'm going to start looking for jobs, do my cv etc and even some refresher courses if possible but it just feels so very, very odd.

Any advice, wise Mumnetters??

OP posts:

alltheworld · 28/12/2015 19:25

Read what colour is your parachute. Be open to taking a different direction. Schedule fun stuff and Jon hunting every day after giving yourself a break. Stay positive.

monkeysox · 28/12/2015 19:28

You are fortunate in getting a decent payout. Hopefully that will be plenty to tide you over while you find a new job.

Fizrim · 28/12/2015 19:32

Ah, sorry to hear this. Someone I know who was made redundant said she wanted any job for about the first six weeks so I do think it will take a bit of time to get used to.

It's not you that is not wanted though - just the role that you used to do. Good luck with the job search.

tibbawyrots · 28/12/2015 19:32

You'll be fine. Keep an open mind, you may find yourself drawn in a different direction than previously. I've been made redundant twice now and both times I took a very different path. When one door closes, another opens. Good luck!

RaeSkywalker · 28/12/2015 19:33

for you.

I've never been in this position but I think I'd try to treat finding a new job like a job- take a couple of days to myself and then start looking on job sites when you'd start work, etc. I guess a positive is that a lot of jobs open up in January. Good luck

londonrach · 28/12/2015 19:34

Wow..new year...new job. Right are you planning to stay within that area of work or explore other areas to work. With a years worth of pay you have some time to play with. Gaps in cv can be hidden by temp jobs, studying etc. Would studying helping you get where you want to work. If you decide to stay within same area of work make job hunting a 9-5 job with abreak at lunch for a walk. Get up as you normally would and be at your desk at 9am doing cv, putting applications in etc. make it a 4 day week with one day off (wednesday maybe) for something fun. Good luck. Took my husband a couple of months working 9-5 job hunting but he got amazing job as a result!

Original poster

Janeymoo50 · 28/12/2015 19:44

Fab advice londonrach.

OP posts:

tobysmum77 · 28/12/2015 19:54

Londonrach is absolutely right. I would add that 51 isn't in any way considered old these days so don't even go there. Most people get made redundant at some point. Good luck and chin up :)

Iwanttokillthem · 28/12/2015 19:56

I think at your age it would be worth widening the circle for job types . Its amazing what different jobs there are out there which can use the skills you now have .
You need some time to take stock and decide what to do and which way you want to go. I must say though that there are probably loads of possibilities less than a 4.5 hour commute .

PerpendicularVincent · 28/12/2015 19:56

When you get interviews, say that you see the redundancy as an opportunity to find an exciting new role, and be positive and constructive. As you've been in your job for so long, you need to show that you aren't 'stale', and are embracing the change.

Spend the time before you get a new role preparing; brush up your skills and CV, meet agencies and network. Travel, learn something new - you have time to do something you've always wanted! And it looks good to a potential employer.

If there is a professional or trade association, join it. Get yourself out there.

londonrach has some good advice. Make your job getting another job, and focus on that every day. You'll get rejections, sometimes no response, and will feel disheartened at times, but a great job is out there for you.

Geepee71 · 28/12/2015 20:01

Sign on with the job centre, this will ensure your stamp gets paid. They also have facilities you can use and my experience was they were helpful in the main. Had the odd staff member who was sneery, but soon changed when they realised I was keen to get back to work!

Trooperslane · 28/12/2015 20:26

Agree with pps.

You haven't been fired through incompetence - things change and the role is no longer there.

Nothing to be ashamed of. You've clearly got a great track record having been there so long and the world is truly your oyster.

New year, new beginning

not jealous of DH who was in your position recently and has a new job

Original poster

Janeymoo50 · 28/12/2015 20:57

But I cannot sign on as my payment is over 16k. Not much over but still.

OP posts:

emwithme · 28/12/2015 21:08

Who told you that?

You will get contributions based JSA for (I think) six months. This will pay a pittance, financially, but more importantly will maintain your NI contributions.

hooliodancer · 28/12/2015 21:08

You sign on and get your national insurance paid, that doesn't take savings into account.

The first 6 months is paid anyway though. However much you have in savings.

RB68 · 28/12/2015 21:16

yes get the signing on over and done with it is excruciatingly painful - plan to do something enjoyable afterwards to take the taste away.

Try and get some help with CV - are work paying for any help at all? Coaching or mentoring to find new roles etc.

You also need to sit down and figure out what you actually want to do and write it out so you can eb clear with yourself and anyone asking what you are looking for - useful for signing on as well as they have a large database of jobs which are poorly coded and sorted - so the more you can narrow it down the better as the less dross they throw at you

Good look - enjoy the first lie in then treat it like a job to find a job - but then that will still be a lie in for you!!!

Set yourself a little office up and a system for keeping things and searching for jobs

TheClacksAreDown · 28/12/2015 21:22

You get contribution based JSA for 6 months regardless of savings.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 28/12/2015 21:35

Wow, 26 years! No wonder your feelings are all over the place! Take a bit of time to reflect if you can. Have a few days of NOT thinking. Only sign on for JSA if you really have to.

You have just as much "worth" as ever, your salary doesn't define you as a person. Take the opportunity to think, re-evaluate, have a rest!

It will feel odd to start with, but you will get used to not working for this employer and hopefully secure another job you REALLY like. Exciting and a wee bit scary at the same time I guess?

Original poster

Janeymoo50 · 28/12/2015 22:33

Thanks Luis, nice post.

OP posts:

LuisSuarezTeeth · 28/12/2015 22:44

Best of luck Janey :)

Original poster

Janeymoo50 · 10/02/2016 21:32

YAAAAY.....I got offered a job today after a brilliant 6 hour interview/assessment yesterday. I'd applied for 9 jobs since Jan 4th, never even heard from 7 of them, had one other interview 3 weeks ago and found out I had not been selected a week ago. Got the good news today at 4pm and it's only 15 mins away (driving). I only found out about it on Friday and spent the whole weekend revising their product range etc. Yaaay.

OP posts:

chickindude · 10/02/2016 21:36

Well done! Huge congratulations

JassyRadlett · 10/02/2016 21:37

Yay! Congratulations!

WeShouldOpenABar · 10/02/2016 21:37

Congratulations! And such a short commute, you won't know yourself

Rangirl · 10/02/2016 21:39

Congratulations and well done

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