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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not drive for 20 mins (and back) to meet my sister?

43 replies

gBean · 19/12/2015 15:56

I ordered a phone for my sister as my firm did a partnership Thing with Apple so she got it cheaper. It arrived today and she wants me to drive for 20-25 mins (and back) to meet her halfway to hand it over.

I've been on my own all day with three kids and a puppy, after a long hard week in a new demanding job and I feel like I'm coming down with a cold.

Sis is ill with urine infection, has a toddler and a newborn.

I can't decided if IABU. She won't start using the phone straight away, but she needs the charger. I want to suggest she buys one from a supermarket for a tenner. I've offered to meet her on Monday...

OP posts:
SirChenjin · 19/12/2015 17:01

I'd do it - wouldn't even have to think twice tbh. 20 mins is just up the road really, no distance at all.

diddl · 19/12/2015 17:06

Doesn't anyone else think that OP should be waiting until Monday to do this non urgent thing then?

If you go Monday would you be able to drive to hers & visit?

mintoil · 19/12/2015 17:11

It is NOT urgent. If it is then her DP can come over later when he isn't so busy and get it then.

Ilikedmyoldusernamebetter · 19/12/2015 17:20

Its not really a matter of whether its harder to be coming down with a cold after a hard week at work and alone with 3 kids, one of whom has additional needs, or to have a "busy" partner, a toddler, a newborn and a urine infection is it? Its a matter of whether the sister "needs" her new phone urgently - which she doesn't.

If the sister had left her antibiotics at OP's, OP would be Unreasonable to refuse to drive 20 minutes each way to give her them, but if its a bit of unwanted hassle for OP (given she's tired and run down and will have to take her 7 yo with her) and just "handy" but not remotely essential for the sister, why should she go- why does one person "trump" the other because her current situation is a bit harder unless the other person's actions have the potential to ease the problem?

Driving a 40 minute round trip when tired and full of cold - to meet her sister half way, so sister will also have to drive a 40 minute round trip with UTI, toddler and newborn - when sister or sister's DP could do a 10 minute round trip and buy a supermarket charger to do until Monday, is just daft.

Its actually a really weird thing for the sister to expect OP to do - OP could the fact sister's DP is so busy he can't get her a charger actually be the elephant in the room? What's your relationship like with your sister? Could it be she actually wants some company or to talk to you - could her DP have left or be being unpleasant to her at home (hence meeting half way without him there) the relationship be on the rocks?

Youarentkiddingme · 19/12/2015 17:21

It's not a million miles away but in certainly wouldn't fancy a non necessary trip out in the dark.
I agree tomorrow morning would be a good compromise.

Oldraver · 19/12/2015 17:32

If she has a DP who is 'too busy' and would rather let her go traipsing out with UTI and a newborn then she has bigger problems than a fucked phone chaarger

GinandJag · 19/12/2015 17:34

I'd drive for 8 hours to see my sister. 20 minutes is a no-brainer.

strawberrypenguin · 19/12/2015 17:36

I think if she wants it that much her DP can come and get it. The OP isn't feeling well either and has already done her sis a favour getting the phone.

poocatcherchampion · 19/12/2015 17:39

I wish my sisters lived that close too.

I'd do it no worries and my 3 DC all need to be loaded in the car. Some child music and I'd have 40 mins of peace :)

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 19/12/2015 17:41

It's a mobile phone, it can wait.

You're not unreasonable to say no.

Don't go.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 19/12/2015 17:44

Bloody Hell, spare us the ' I wish my sister lived so close', bollocks,Hmm it's for a mobile phone charger, not a medical emergency.

Those simpering that you'd do it, give over.

diddl · 19/12/2015 17:48

I agree Still

OP has suggested Monday, not said no!

villainousbroodmare · 19/12/2015 17:54

Ah, go on! Grin

SirChenjin · 19/12/2015 17:58

Spare us the those simpering that you'd do it bollocks.

No-one needs to get over anything.

Jux · 19/12/2015 17:58

What does she want the charger for, when she doesn't want the phone? You say she could get a charger 5 mins away and yet prefers to drive 20+ mins and the return journey, in order to get it.

Makes no sense. Her dp obviously thinks she's being a bit silly too - or is he a bit of a shit?

CwtchMeQuick · 19/12/2015 17:58

Personally, I think I'd drive the whole way and probably take her a stash of painkillers, cystitis sachets, cranberry juice, and something nice for her to eat. And I'd probably stay and sort the toddler if her partner isn't there.
This is only because I know how awful UTIs are with a toddler, can't imagine what hell it would be with a newborn too. If my sister was a poorly as I get with utis I'd just want to give her a hug and make her a cuppa.

Teacakequeen · 19/12/2015 18:13

What's her partner busy doing?

Original poster
gBean · 19/12/2015 19:49

I've arranged to meet her tomorrow - her dp is more than capable of getting her a charger/cranberry juice.

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