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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To suggest that ff babies are generally more content than breastfed babies?

931 replies

mrsb26 · 08/12/2015 20:16

...because they are fuller for longer?

Following on from an article I read recently regarding a study that suggested that of its recipients, the ff babies were generally deemed to be more calm, easy to settle to sleep etc than breastfed babies.

I know this is bound to be a taboo subject, but I must say, as a breastfeeding mother myself to a 4 month old dd, I have considered whether she'd be more satisfied on formula. She's not the easiest of babies and, to me, seems fussier and more demanding than her formula fed peers.

For example, she is really hard to settle to sleep for naps. She will sometimes feed to sleep, but not always (I know this is a debate on itself). I have never been to the shops or out for a walk for half an hour without her fussing (even if it's just for a little bit). She will sit on my knee or go to someone else for five minutes tops before fussing and starting to cry.

I'm not doubting the benefits of the quality of breastmilk, obviously. I guess I just feel like I'm filling up a tank that's emptying as quick as it's filling^^ and that she's never fully satisfied. I know breastmilk is digested quicker, but still.

She has no issues re: reflux, tongue tie or anything either.

Of course there are behavioural differences amongst all babies, but as a general rule, what is your opinion? Interested to hear from anyone who has perhaps breastfed one baby and formula fed another.

OP posts:
TaliZorah · 09/12/2015 19:26

It might be natural and what they're there for but its still an accurate description

Booboostwo · 09/12/2015 19:26

How much the baby needs the breast can differ from baby to baby...in my grand experience of two babies! Purely anecdotal but DD was a slow and frequent breast feeder, who used the breast for comfort every time she was in pain, scared, lonely, etc. she also fell asleep with the nipple in her mouth and would wake up if I tried to prise it out. DS is a fast and infrequent feeder (both very large babies), who doesn't breast feed for comfort, happy to drop feeds for solids, happy to let go of the nipple, turn his back on me and sleep. A very different experience of the time and commitment required to bf.

Freezingwinter · 09/12/2015 19:26

Your insinuation is that she's a human dummy when in fact the dummy was invented to replace the nipple.

Does breastfeeding make you a human milk bottle? Grin

Snossidge · 09/12/2015 19:27

Human pacifier.
Human baby carrier.
Human feeding bottle.

Snossidge · 09/12/2015 19:29

Rocking your baby to sleep like a Human Baby Swing. Bouncing your baby on your knee like a Human Fisher Price Jumperoo.

Freezingwinter · 09/12/2015 19:29

Snossidge I love your username (off topic but here ya go)

bumbleymummy · 09/12/2015 19:40

I don't think so Tali. It's more that dummies are artificial pacifiers - they are replacing the mother.

Alisvolatpropiis · 09/12/2015 19:42

A form of pacifier has existed for centuries, because it has long not been the norm to put baby on boob if it so much as squeaks.

I wouldn't describe it as merely "acting like a mother" because formula feeding and behaving like a mother are not mutually exclusive terms, as far as I am aware.

CultureSucksDownWords · 09/12/2015 19:47

Alis, no one said they were mutually exclusive! One way of being a mother doesn't negate all other ways of being a mother. The point is that calling a woman a "human pacifier" is odd.

Snossidge · 09/12/2015 19:48

Pacifying your baby is acting like a mother, despite some popular approaches advocating leaving babies to cry.

Alisvolatpropiis · 09/12/2015 19:49

But if the baby isn't being fed, that is essentially what is going on.

It's a term I've heard used amongst breastfeeding mums.

Alisvolatpropiis · 09/12/2015 19:51

Snoss agree, irrespective of method.

CultureSucksDownWords · 09/12/2015 19:55

It's not a term I've heard a breastfeeding mother use in rl. I just don't like the way it describes an often normal part of a breastfeeding mother/baby dynamic, and refers to the mother as an object.

TurquoiseDress · 09/12/2015 19:55

OP- in my (limited) experience
I'd say you were correct.

Before my LO was even born, friends & aquiantances would ask what I planning in terms of feeding.

Said that I'd give BF a crack, if it didn't work out then I'd FF.
Quite a few of them commented that FF would allow us to get into a good routine & that he'd sleep well.

Did about 2 weeks mixed feeding then on FF and he always napped well during the day, feeding every 3 or 4 hours. Slept through at around 4 months.

I don't think you can generalise but that was my own experience.
Will get back to you after baby number 2!

CultureSucksDownWords · 09/12/2015 19:57

It's not a term I've heard a breastfeeding mother use in rl. I just don't like the way it describes an often normal part of a breastfeeding mother/baby dynamic, and refers to the mother as an object.

Cotto · 09/12/2015 20:10

Bloody hell its all kicked off! Grin

Im really dont give a shit what anyone calls my BF my babies.
I loved seeing their little faces when they latched on - like human crack Grin
Utterly blissful experience and yes it did really matter what my babies were fed on.
BF is way more than just calories .

Freezingwinter · 09/12/2015 20:12

Cottco you could have read my mind. Totally agree Flowers

TaliZorah · 09/12/2015 20:13

I don't see it as much different to giving a bottle and a cuddle and yes I've done both.

Cotto · 09/12/2015 20:20

That's your opinion Tali
Anyone can give a baby a bottle and a cuddle- different to giving the milk your baby needs at that time- with the right nutrients and also the mothers hormones.
They have skin to skin contact with the mother only if they are BF.

Its a more intense relationship-based around the childs needs not around the get the baby to sleep through the nightmantra

No comparison.

DixieNormas · 09/12/2015 20:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DixieNormas · 09/12/2015 20:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TaliZorah · 09/12/2015 20:24

They have skin to skin contact with the mother only if they are BF.

That's a load of crap I did skin to skin with DS after I switched to formula.

Your post just makes it sound like its about YOUR needs. You need to be needed and need to be the only one who can you feed your baby.

Why is it a bad thing for a baby to sleep through the night?

FattySantaRobin · 09/12/2015 20:25

They have skin to skin contact with the mother only if they are BF.

So what the fuck have I been doing with my formula fed babies? Did they all have some sort of skin coloured garment between me and them at bath times? When having a bottle after a bath?

Cotto · 09/12/2015 20:26

I do speak for myself- why would I speak for other parents,
BF is different from FF
Get over it !!Grin

Cotto · 09/12/2015 20:27

I do speak for myself- why would I speak for other parents,
BF is different from FF
Get over it !!Grin