to not allow DSD, who hasn't yet passed driving test, to have 6yr old DD as a passenger

[CheekyMaleekey]

DH is outraged that I won't allow DD to sit in the back, while DSD drives, with him as passenger. She's failed her test twice. He says she's a good driver.

I think it's reckless. AIBU?

No chance. Not even if she had past her test to be honest. I would want at least a year or so 'real' driving experience before putting my kids in a car with someone.

if the kid is like most her age, she will talk constantly. This is very distracting and an inexperienced driver may not cope.

leave the passengers behind.

I let my younger DD sit in the car when elder DD is practicing, she has taken 2 tests so is probably about the same level as your DSD.
My DD2 is older though.

I don't get in the car with DD1 (unless there is no other option) but that is because I am a nervous passenger and we usually end up arguing.

Firstly small children are distracting, singing, chatting, not understanding when to shut up. Secondly, if something was to happen, your DSD would never get over harming her sister. I think setting the benchmark of having passed her test at least is definitely NBU.

Curiouser - it is definitely allowed.

Experience does not equal good. I would wager that a very large proportion of experienced drivers would be highly unlikely to pass a test these days. A newer driver is more likely IMO to pay attention to everything and not take stupid chances.

It's good practice to get used to driving with distractions though? Will help her pass her test and ultimately be a better and more confident driver.

yes, drivers do need to multiplex, but while she is still getting the mechanics of the skill, the fewer distractions the better.

I still turn the radio off if I'm in a busy car park, and while most adults know to stop talking at a junction/roundabout, kids don't and have to be asked to be quiet.

I agree with you OP.

Do you normally get on pretty well? Because it might come across as you not caring if DH and DSD get into an accident but you do if DD does.

I think it's incredibly unlikely that she will suddenly do something stupid and dangerous on the school run. However, kids are distracting. My DDad always had us in the car when he practiced for his test. He survived, as did we.

Yanbu I would not be happy, unless it's duel control. As a learner driver, I would not be happy carrying extra passengers, especially children.

That's why the premiums on recently passed drivers are set so high as they are more likely to have accidents!

Insurance is cheaper for learner drivers than newly passed though. It shoots up when they pass and are thus unsupervised.

SoupDragon

Not always so, my insurance when I was learning was 1400 per year and my insurance (in my first year of driving) is now £1100.

OP, YANBU. It's not a dual control car so there is absolutely nothing your DH can do if something happens.

I can see why you wouldn't be happy with it.

The point about 6yo distracting DSD is a good one, and for that reason alone I'd also worry. Just having loud music on in the car is enough for me to get distracted and react slower, I'd worry about a new driver and the distraction a young sister could bring.

I would tell DSD that too, it's not that you're not confident in her driving abilities, it's that you don't want DD to distract her when she's not used to dealing with that sort of distraction.

Has she done intensive courses, so that she's had a lot of lessons but not over a very long period of time? How long has she actually been learning for?

I don't think you understand how difficult driving tests actually are. I failed one recently after being told by the examiner that my driving was perfect.

If she is at the level where she is ready to take her test, no doubt she can carry passengers on a short, familiar journey.

Does she even want to have a child in the car while she drives?

For me, learning to drive was very stressful, I preferred to be on the road alone after I had passed my test. Having people in there who would suffer if I caused an accident (or got involved in one) adds an extra layer of stress.

I assume there is another way for DD to get home from school?

learners are easily distracted and indeed learning. there is a distinction between a learner and a new driver. if the test meant nothing and wasn't a reflection of someone's ability then there would be no need for a test.
in Canada learners are not allowed anyone else in the vehicle other than an adult with a full drivers license.
yanbu

I used to drive to collect my DB from school as a learner but once I passed my test my parents would not let me have any passengers for 6 months. However DB was a young teen so capable of being quiet, I wouldn't have thought I'd have been allowed with younger children who could be a distraction.

As much as at the time it drove me mad that I wasn't allowed to take passengers I shall be doing the same for my DC.

So in answer yes I would let an 'experienced learner' DC drive the others assuming they were old enough to understand they had to be quiet. I wouldn't allow it with a newly passed driver though.

She wouldn't be driving my DD until 6 months after she had passed her test.

Why the need for anyone else in the car? Can't think of the reason to put in a child in with a learner driver?

I wouldn't, but I have a car phobia as it is and just wouldn't be able to take the risk!