Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Pregnant and told to move on bus

49 replies

spartafrag · 03/12/2015 17:54

I'm 32 weeks pregnant and was getting the bus home earlier. I sit at the front in the priority seats (not the wheelchair and buggy ones but technically the first row of seats on the bus). I sit there so that there isn't a possibility I'll fall making my way up the bus to get a seat as its moving and because it's easier to get off of its busy (SPD and rhesus negative so would be tricky if I took any blows to bump/fell).

I was sat there on a half empty bus and this well abled 50 year old looking woman got on, she took one look at me and told me to move to the back despite there being a space next to me. I said I didn't have a problem with her sitting next to me but she just tutted at me, said I shouldn't be sitting there and went and sat a bit further up the bus. There were about 6 people on it and there were available seats much closer to the front if that's what she was bothered about. The whole thing startled me and the driver asked me if I was okay as I got off. AIBU to think that woman was a little crazy?

OP posts:

KanyesVest · 03/12/2015 18:32

I got an earful from an older man when I was 38 weeks pregnant and in my way to the physio for SPD treatment. I was so thrown by it, I got up. I wasn't even in a priority seat . Hope you're OK op, try to forget it and make sure you get a priority seat on the couch tonight

toffeeboffin · 03/12/2015 18:33

Next time just tell her to fuck off. That'll teach her.

Greengardenpixie · 03/12/2015 18:36

Doesn't matter if OP looks pregnant.
Yeh, i know this.
Im not justifying just merely trying to think of a reason why she might say this.

alltouchedout · 03/12/2015 18:37

She sounds rude and odd. Even if you weren't heavily pregnant how's she to know you don't have a hidden disability? Silly woman!

LineyReborn · 03/12/2015 18:39

Bloody hell. When did 50 equate to old?

Hope you're ok, OP. Try and forget it and have a good evening watching bad telly or something nice.

chillycurtains · 03/12/2015 19:12

Not all disablities are visual so the woman was being very very very unreasonable. She had no right to speak to you about where you were sitting.

People like that are unpleasant to encounter but the best thing is to brush it off and forget about it.

kali110 · 03/12/2015 20:18

She was unreasonable but you are also to say she looked able bodied.
I get talked about by people whenever i am on public transport for sitting in those seats as i look young and able bodied when i am not.

kissmethere · 03/12/2015 20:33

Ha! Definitely she had nothing better to do. Dont sweat people like that. It's upsetting but some people just HAVE to say something for no reason.

MummySparkle · 03/12/2015 21:05

YANBU she sounds loopy! My mum is in her 50s and I know she would never dream of doing anything like that.

I've had looks from people for sitting on the very front seat of a double decker bus when I was 8 months pregnant. It was this time of year so very busy with shoppers. I had a big coat on and a bag on what was left of my lap, so it wouldn't have been obvious that I was pregnant. I would have been living had anybody challenged me though. There are so many reasons why a person might need to sit down near the front of a bus, and probably half of them aren't obvious at a quick glance.

MummyZELC · 03/12/2015 21:12

I had a similar experience when heavily pregnant - except the stupid cow wanted me to move to put her shopping trolley there! Let's just say she got told to 'fuck off' with probably a couple more obscenities!

littlemermaid80 · 03/12/2015 21:36

There was a woman on crutches in our previous town, everyone knew her, she was as mad as a box of snakes.
Every time she got on the bus, she would heard straight to the "priority seating" and if there was anyone there, pregnant, elderly, it didn't matter, she'd bellow "EXCUSE ME I'M DISABLED" at the top of her voice. Plus she always wanted the window seat, the aisle seat wasn't good enough!
She got told to erm, do one, several times.

YANBU. She sounds rude and ignorant.

x2boys · 03/12/2015 21:44

Just ignore I sat in a priority seat today no other seats were available there was nobody standing up and nobody who appeared to have a disability if some body else came on the bus who needed it or wanted it I would have stood up anyway if a seats availabLe and nobody need s I can't see the problem ut I would have definitely stood up for you with out being asked .

CerseiHeartsJaime4ever · 03/12/2015 21:52

I had similar when an old lady told me the wheelchair space wasn't for my buggy, it was for her bag. I said it's not for either actually, it's the wheel chair space and if one comes we both have to move. She flipped out - it was for her bag and NO ONE else.

The she said my son was too young to have his own phone (it was a peppa pig toy)

Yanbu, she obvs had issues unrelated to you

DownstairsMixUp · 03/12/2015 22:13

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

MagicalHamSandwich · 03/12/2015 22:17

Slightly unhinged - there are just people like that. I've been reprimanded by complete strangers for my clothes, my posture, my choice of seat on public transport and even my choice of mobile.

Just ignore and have a quiet chuckle to yourself once they're out of sight!

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 03/12/2015 22:35

IME there is a disproportionately high number of oddballs to be encountered on the average public bus. You just happened to meet one today.

Ignore it :)

ohtheholidays · 03/12/2015 22:45

She was being a dick because even if she needed one of those seats, like you said there were other priority seats she could sit in and I say that as someone who is disabled and has 2 children that are disabled.

Some people just like to have something to moan about or someone to moan at.

emwantsbiscuits · 04/12/2015 09:07

I would be taken aback too and YANBU at all.
I agree with the other posters. She sounds like she has mental issues. Such a shame that she was really rude to you. :(
I'm 39 weeks pregnant and rh neg too so well understand why you're keen to sit on those seats.
I hope that you enjoy the rest of your pregnancy OP xxx

Birdsgottafly · 04/12/2015 09:28

There are plenty of people who don't like other people and will try to be Nasty, or on a constant power trip, to those that they think they can pick on, in most cases, pregnant Women/New Mums.

MH issues aside.

I am Vocal about misuse of Priorty seating, when I know the circumstances (local non disabled/confident teens etc that plonk themselves in the front seats), because I transport people in wheelchairs.

The seats are there for the most needy, but we should all really consider if we do need them. I'm recovering from Pneumonia, some days I do need them, on other days, I don't.

Some people are selfish arseholes because she clearly didn't need the seat.

ouryve · 04/12/2015 09:34

Ignore.

I'm not far short of 50 and do have an invisible disability. Someone heavily pregnant needs those seats far more than I do.

I prefer to hide further back where I can take the aisle seat when the bus isny full, to save my lower back from the strain of shuffling across.

NeedAScarfForMyGiraffe · 04/12/2015 09:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jelly101 · 04/12/2015 11:03

I always remember waiting for the bus when I was 34 weeks pregnant. I had just missed one so I had to wait 20 minutes for another.

About 5 minutes before the bus was due, a woman who lives in my aunties street (she's 61) came to the bus stop. When the bus came, I was fully prepared to let her go in front of me and get on the bus first. I hadn't even moved and she stuck her hand out in front of me abruptly, making contact with my stomach (you could tell that I was heavily pregnant) and said 'just hold on a minute' and got on the bus first.

What annoyed me more was that even though I had waited in the rain for 20 minutes, I was going to let her on the bus first anyway. I couldn't believe how rude she was.

Another incident I remember is when my DS was a few weeks old and I was catching the bus. There were around 4 people on there and when I got on there was an elderly woman sitting in the priority seats (fair enough), but I was struggling to fit my pushchair in the space and the lady never even budged her feet to make room and proceeded to tut at me when I asked if she could move her feet slightly, (she could see I was struggling) as though I was an inconvenience. My son was in a carry cot at the time so I couldn't even collapse the pushchair down. The seats right behind her we're both free, without having to go up any steps, but she never even attempted to make things a bit easier for me.

Adelecarberry87 · 04/12/2015 11:17

I've been heavily pregnant, struggled with my son and made to stand up. Whilst able bodied people sat there and watched. In the end an old lady sat my son on her knee so he was safe as we were flying all over the place. Theres some extremely rude public transport users. I avoid the bus and go to town when my husbands off work instead.

kali110 · 05/12/2015 16:57

How do so many people know that others are able bodied??
I'm sure not everybody has invisible disabilities, but i do and so do a few people i know.
We all look young and able bodied!
I've been moaned at and talked about on public transport for not giving up my seat

Flip

1 2