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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to try a dummy to stop my nipples from falling of?!

58 replies

AngelicCurls · 02/12/2015 21:56

Posting here for traffic-sorry Blush

DS 11wk has just spent the last 90 mins sucking. He started off feeding well, swallowing milk but is now just sucking and not swallowing. If I unlatch him he fusses then starts to cry. Rocking him to sleep just makes him cross.

Up until now I've fed him to sleep in about half an hour, slid him across to his crib (we've a homemade side cot type arrangement) and he's stayed zonked for the next 4-5 hrs.

Last night was horrendous, took nearly 2 hrs to get to sleep, slept for 3 hrs then took another hour to go off again after his feed, before his big sister decided she wanted to wake me up as wellSad

So I sent DH get a dummy tonight when after the 4th time I tried to unlatch him resulted in him shoving his whole fist in his mouth, gagging then projectile vomming milk all down the wall. he's now sucking quite happily on it but I'm all guilt striken... What if he is hungry/on a growth spurt? Will he still grizzle for a feed with a dummy? I don't want him to not feed if he needs it but I can't cope with another night like this (or rather my poor boobs can't!), plus I'd really like to go downstairs and eat my dinner now (hungry emoticon!)

OP posts:
sunnyawry · 02/12/2015 22:00

You're onto a winner if he's sucking on it happily. Get some food. Dummy will prob fall out when he's deep asleep. He will still let you know when he's hungry.

CasualJersey · 02/12/2015 22:02

YANBU

Don't feel guilty

Have some rest

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/12/2015 22:04

DD had a dummy and was a milk pig. No worries about her not letting me know if she was hungry.

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 02/12/2015 22:04

I feel your pain! Definitely use the dummy. They saved my sanity when dd was tiny. I'm having dc2 soon and will be introducing a dummy at about 6 weeks. If he's hungry, he's unlikely to take a dummy so don't worry.

My nipple actually did fall off... I was in the Ikea restaurant and dd was 2 weeks old. Quite a traumatic moment... But it grew back thank god! If your nipples are in a really bad state then I really recommend nipple shields. Mine healed in a few days once I started using them. Hope things get easier soon!

sunnyawry · 02/12/2015 22:05

NotAWhale omfg how traumatic!

Pollyputhtekettleon · 02/12/2015 22:06

YABRediculous to worry! Dummy are great. Ignore the rubbish fear mongering about confusion/starving them/buck teeth. You baby is 11 weeks. We'll able to feed properly and relax with a dummy in between.

BertieBotts · 02/12/2015 22:07

It's fine. He'll definitely let you know when he's hungry. Don't worry!

Do you have real life help with BF - not a health visitor, but somebody who is actually trained in BF support? If you need help on how to find someone give a shout. If things improve then you might not need it (it could just be a growth spurt/one off :) ) but generally if you're having pain or prolonged feeding it's a good idea to get everything checked just in case.

Congratulations on your baby. Now eat, sleep!

GreatFuckability · 02/12/2015 22:08

Your nipple FELL OFF????Shock

Dummies and nipple shields were my very best friends

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 02/12/2015 22:13

It was awful. The top half of it came right off. It was like a small jelly tot on the lino floor. I didn't know what to do (I was a little bit hysterical), but luckily dh kept a cool head and picked it up in a napkin Grin

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 02/12/2015 22:14

Honestly it's completely fine now. You'd never guess from looking at it.

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/12/2015 22:14

luckily dh kept a cool head and picked it up in a napkin Is he the next fucking James Bond? Shock I think my DH would have run, screaming.

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 02/12/2015 22:16

He's proud to be a Mumsnet legend Grin

GreatFuckability · 02/12/2015 22:18

Jesus Notawhale I'm impressed with your husband! I'm glad it got better!

Katastrophe13 · 02/12/2015 22:20

He will definitely spit the dummy and yell his head off if he needs milk, don't worry about that!!

Jesus notawhale, I thought my nips got In a bad state!!! Had no idea nipples could regenerate like dr who, you learn something new every day.

ProvisionallyAnxious · 02/12/2015 22:21

It was like a small jelly tot on the lino floor.

As a not-yet-parent on Mumsnet, I read parenting threads to save up tips for days to come. Occasionally, I read things that make me go ahahaha maybe I should re-think the days to come thing.

Original poster
AngelicCurls · 02/12/2015 22:21

Jeez, I can't imaging how traumatic a nipple falling off would be!!

Thanks for all the reassurance, it's much appreciated.

No issues with BF now thankfully, had tongue tie snipped at 5d and has been plain sailing since then. He's not feeding more in the day so I don't think It's a growth spurt and I don't have any pain per se, just when he suckles for that length of time it starts to feel a bit irritating (nipple-wise!)

I know I'm just a dummy snob, I'm not a fan of them and was secretly glad DD never took one, but he's gone to sleep now and I'm downstairs about to eat dinner so am very relieved!

Also, do I sterilise the dummy every day? Or more frequently?

OP posts:
Original poster
AngelicCurls · 02/12/2015 22:23

Cross posted...
jelly tot on the floor is possible the most disturbing image I've had for a while!

OP posts:
TheCarpenter · 02/12/2015 22:33

Lots of people are dummy-snobs. Until they realise their actual use and that it isn't for 'shutting up a baby'. Grin

I encouraged them once I realised this. DC only feed/suckle on me when they're hungry. BF like a dream and I get a break when they want comfort. They can still have the comfort of cuddles with a dummy, but Daddy can share the joy and being pinned to the couch too. It's deprives them of nothing and helps you get a break.

Enjoy your dinner!

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 02/12/2015 22:46

My (left) nipple has never been so -in-famous

I don't know what we were thinking in going to Ikea in the first place. I'd had a very traumatic birth and difficult start to breastfeeding. I can only assume that the sleep deprivation clouded our judgement that day. We'd been to the midwife clinic and been signed over to the health visitor, it was a sparkly sunny wintry morning, dd was asleep in the car seat, I'd washed my hair... We just thought "wahey! Let's go to Ikea and buy a Poang chair!" Utter, utter madness with a gannetous newborn.

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 02/12/2015 22:49

I think we sterilised them pretty often at first, and then less often. Dd always preferred the MAM ones, which come in a handy mini steriliser/storage box. She still has one at 21 months, although strictly just at bedtime. It's usually somewhere on the other side of the room by morning. She's a dummy finger. Every now and then we have to dig them out from behind the bookcase.

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 02/12/2015 22:51

Dummy flinger, not finger.

Mmmmcake123 · 02/12/2015 22:54

I think the dummy snob thing comes from us mums worrying about toddlers who refuse to give a dummy up, but that is a long way off and probably won't even happen! For now the best thing for you is to get a break in order to recharge. I might be completely wrong but when I bf, my lo persistently used me as a soother, it meant that I got hardly any sleep and woke up without enough milk to satisfy. My lo would not accept a dummy, oh how I tried. Give yourself a break, sleep is very important for building up a good milk supply IMO. Good luck and hope your dinner was tasty, you need to be treated as well as your little cutie baby

SquinkiesRule · 02/12/2015 22:54

My middle boy loved his dummy. He just wanted to suck, all he did was suck, he was so calm and happy so long as he was latched on. So at 6 weeks I fed him as usual, then popped in the dummy and his little eyes rolled up in pleasure and he was in love. Don't feel bad, all we want is a happy healthy baby. I got those soft little NUK ones it never bothered his latch or my milk supply.
Other two hated dummies. One had nothing, one had her thumb.

Peaceloveandpartyrings · 02/12/2015 23:20

I was a dummy snob, until an EIGHT HOUR suckling session. I just flipped out. It is awful even without nipples falling off (wtf!). I cracked and gave DS one around 3-4 weeks but he gave it up himself at around 8-9 months, which I was so pleased about because I was worried about having to take it off him as a toddler.
Embrace the dummy.

MrsBojingles · 02/12/2015 23:44

I tried desperately to get DD to take a dummy, she wouldn't have it. Happily at 8 weeks she found her thumb, stopped sucking it by 6 months. Now chews her fingers instead.