to ignore/not accept apology

[mikado1]

Dh has apologised for the same thing he always apologises for-namely getting srressed with ds in very non-emergency situations, when staying calm would be a great help. I then have to leave what I am doing to calm things down. He has said sorry but aibu to have sighed and said nothing? I was making dinner and trying to get baby off to sleep and could have done with a help rather than having more to do.

My mom's catch phrase was always "Don't tell me you're sorry, show me you're sorry by not doing it again".

If he's saying sorry and still doing it, it's not a real apology is it?

Well exactly. I always say sorry means you won't do it again. I am going to use your mum's line. I am mad because he could have really been a help at time but instead chose to react.

I had to sneakily teach my DH how to deal with potentially stressful situations - for some reason he'd get cross about things being, drooped, spilled, broken etc.

My initial response to him is always "Was anybody hurt?" and when he says 'no' then go "phew, good job, now let's sort out X"

Now his response is much better and calmer about things like that.

With your DH maybe help him find away to not get so stressed?

I really have tried tho mostly he seems to resent my trying and says I'm patronising and if I say something while he's in a stress, forget it! Same bloody thing here tonight Seems to have no perspective re life/bedtime with small children. Thunder cloud over the house as a result. I am tempted to say last night's apology obvs meant nothing. .