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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to ask why some people walk directly into my path?

69 replies

SuperFlyHigh · 21/11/2015 16:21

Have recently noticed this phenomenon and wanted to ask AIBU about people who when you're out walking walk deliberately towards you into your path of walking causing you to swerve. Diagonally seems a favourite tactic and i almost have to leap out of the road!

An ex colleague of mine said this happened to him too so it can't be a one off.

Why do they do it?! Mostly people by themselves.

OP posts:
Wagglebees · 21/11/2015 23:57

my illness means that sometimes my spacial awareness goes to shit and to get out of someone's way takes careful manoeuvring and massive effort so if I feel myself going like that I pick a clear bit of the pavement/road and head down that way. But that doesn't stop people suddenly deciding to head towards me instead of walking on the other clear bit. I nearly fell over twice tonight trying to get down a high street because of people walking side by side in groups and refusing to move out of anyone's way. I should've just stayed in in hindsight.

I have noticed that if you fix your eyes on a distant point and walk with your head up, straight through, everyone will automatically get out of your way. If you can manage that then it never fails.

Spectre8 · 22/11/2015 00:46

My biggest gripe if people walking in pairs...you have a couple or a pair of people walking side by side towards you and you need to pass each other, the pavement isn't quite wide enough that you can all pass by without one person moving aside. Never fails to amaze me how the single person has to stop or squeeze past the pair of people, you would think one of the two would sort of move into a single file so you can all pass easily, but no never ever! ARGHHH

ZoeTurtle · 22/11/2015 17:54

One of you has to give way. My rule is if somebody changes course and puts themselves in my path, they should give way. If we're both walking in a straight line, or if I have to cross into their path to avoid an obstacle, I'll move.

I don't move for people absorbed in their phones and not looking. I'll crash into them if they don't move, and hope their phones get damaged. May get me in trouble one day but honestly it'll be worth it to teach these twats to fucking look where they're going.

ZoeTurtle · 22/11/2015 17:55

I also don't move for groups. They have room to get into single/double file or whatever. I'm not stepping into the road for them.

Andylion · 22/11/2015 18:28

My biggest gripe if people walking in pairs...... Or when they walk in pairs but with a huge bit of room between them, but not enough room for me to pass through, just enough room that they are taking the space of 2 and half people.

SuperFlyHigh · 22/11/2015 18:30

My whole point originally is so I'm walking in a straight line towards eg the train station, most sane people can see you're walking on right/left hand side and normally adjust accordingly. But I've had people also literally veer into my path, like do a sideways step into my path. Why?!

Groups of people are even worse and really rude not to mention dangerous if I have to step into the road....

The thing is when I see bigger men or women and taller too they generally do not have this problem so because I'm small (5 foot 5?!) these people take advantage of my size?! Confused [sceptical]

OP posts:
RoboticSealpup · 22/11/2015 19:20

If you fix your eyes at a point just above people's heads as you walk through a crowd of people walking in the opposite direction, they don't bump into you. I'm not sure why, but it always seems to work.

RoboticSealpup · 22/11/2015 19:21

Then again, I'm quite a bit taller than you.

NorbertDentressangle · 22/11/2015 19:32

Spectre8 and Andylion - yes, the pairs who take up an entire pavement s width and don't go to single file, step to one side or close the gap to allow you past drive me mad too!

Another scenario to throw into the equation (this happens to me all the time) ..... you're standing in a shop browsing something on the shelves and someone comes and stands between you and the things you're looking at. They don't just nip into the gap, grab what they need off the shelf and step away again, oh no, they stand there for ages, blocking your view so that you're just left staring at the back of their head!

WhatALoadOfOldBollocks · 22/11/2015 19:51

I get it a lot. I can be walking to the side of a pavement and someone who was over the other side or in the middle starts veering towards me. Most of the time it's because they're on their phones but not always. I refuse to move out of the way because they were the ones to change their course and get in my way. If they're on their phones I tend to stop. It usually gives them a bit of a shock to realise they've almost crashed into someone because they were oblivious to their surroundings.

"Not to mention the people walking in twos or threes, taking up the whole pavement, who don't move over at all so you have to either stop or walk in the road!"
Oh yes, I've had that. On one occassion I just kept walking (right on the edge of the pavement I might add) and the young women barged straight into me, then had the audacity to turn around and give me daggers! She probably expected me to walk into the road so her and her mates could continue walking 3 abreast along the narrow pavement. God forbid one of them should move over to make way for anyone coming the other way. Well fuck that.Angry

amarmai · 22/11/2015 21:01

part free floating aggression, part self entitlement, part more people around, part different use of public space in other parts of the world.

LadyColinCampbell · 22/11/2015 21:05

OP I think you're overthinking it a little bit, I'm sure that nobody thinks "ooh, that woman looks like she needs pissing off, let's walk straight in front of her." It's annoying when people don't have enough awareness of others to step into an awkward place or bump into you in the shops but most people say a quick sorry if they are close enough and don't intentionally try to annoy you. We all have to share busy public places!

TheHouseOnTheLane · 22/11/2015 21:18

I give way to anyone who is more vulnerable than me...I move when they're approaching me so that they have the inside....the wall edge of the path rather than the road edge.

That's basic good manners. If it's a person who is equal to me...as in similar age (40s) then I judge their expression...if they look sad or friendly then I give way.

If they look Angry then I don't.

It's something I've given FAR too much time to!

SuperFlyHigh · 22/11/2015 21:22

Ladycolin actually if you read my OP I mention where my male colleague who's about 5 foot 7 has the same problem...

I do actually think it's related to height.

Also we both live and work in one of the busiest cities in the world, London!

OP posts:
SuperFlyHigh · 22/11/2015 21:24

amarmai I think you have it spot on actually combo if all those factors!

OP posts:
Spiritdreams · 24/09/2018 02:53

I'm cool with it if someone is clumsy, for whatever reason, or dizzy, has dyspraxia, is trying to handle a kid with a tantrum, etc. You're fine. But for some it seems to be totally on purpose. Like... I won't move. You move. Subconsciously seeing others as not mattering.

I'm happy to move aside if it seems necessary, or just so we don't all bump into each other 24/7. But some people (and this ain't no complex) just expect you to be the one who moves, and it gets old. Like people can sense who's the anxious one, the one more likely to move. I'm short and quiet and sometimes have felt like I'm seen as an easy push or an empty space... maybe not even on purpose, just, subconsciously.

I've even noticed myself do it very occasionally. I only do it when I've had it up to here moving aside, either on the street or putting my needs second, and then I stride along like I'm ready to murder something, and you'd be surprised who moves. Like we really do have law of the jungle or something. In this case there's a chance I have been the one described here as the selfish walker - but only when I have zero f---s left to give. And even then, I don't do that just to stand in the spot someone else had, or to barge into someone's path when there was tons of room, that sort of nonsense.

Lastly, a shout out to teenagers (in my area anyways), they are polite and will let people through! Even the 'toughies'. They rock. If you say excuse me, they will. And I move some for them too.

Whereismumhiding2 · 24/09/2018 03:29

@Spiritdreams- how on earth did you find this zombie thread? It's 3 years old!!

Spiritdreams · 24/09/2018 06:19

I found it on the first page of a google search, thought some people had a point and added my thoughts.

But thanks for taking the time out of your day to point this out to me!

SamanthaJayne4 · 24/09/2018 08:40

Sometimes it's accidental and is normal give and take but some people do it deliberately. I carry on walking and look out for street furniture which I can dodge behind at the last minute (just step to the side, doesn't look odd!). It does perplex the idiots!

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