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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Naked woman in sauna

256 replies

DyslexicScientist · 19/11/2015 20:48

This just happened, local leisure center a young woman walked into the sauna naked. Someone else immediatly said to her "you can't be in here like that love, its not allowed". She replied I'm German, this is sauna, does this offend you?. The other woman said no, but it is the rules. The naked woman then went on about how she always does it, sauna doesn't work unless your naked and everywhere else in Europe does this.

Some young men opened the sauna door, and closed it immediately when they saw her. She laughed and said back " its OK you can come in". She clearly heard people telling her it wasn't allowed and was enjoying the attention she got.

I kind of see her point about prefering to be naked, but there are rules in place and she was obviously making other people uncomfortable.

Was I bu to tell reception on the way out?

OP posts:
MistressoftheYoniverse · 20/11/2015 16:36

Is looking automatically sexual? Hmm

SirChenjin · 20/11/2015 16:39

At naked cocks?

Yeah, I'd say it was. I wouldn't want to think any bloke in a supposedly non-sexual sauna was looking at my boobs or fanjo.

And I should have put a Grin after the Hmm in my previous post - I was being facetious.

Radiatorvalves · 20/11/2015 16:49

When in Rome I say...

Many moons ago I found myself in the public sauna in St moritz with a lot of British marines. I knew these guys well (no not THAT well) and was a little bit self conscious.... I'd heard about their very exciting love lives (multiple) in far too much detail.

A small Swiss bloke yelled KEINE ANZUG as I tried to slip discretely I to the sauna. The pool was glacial. So off kit it was... Once my eyes adjusted, it was quite clear that the boys had more reason to be self conscious than me. Despite their Casanova reputations, there were no massive cocks draped anywhere.

MistressoftheYoniverse · 20/11/2015 16:57

ahhh ok..Grin but I don't think it necessarily is Sir might just be for observation purposes ya know... you do know that someone will be looking at your giblets in the non sexual sauna right?..secretly eyeing up your boobs and fanjo

SirChenjin · 20/11/2015 16:59

Which is precisely why I keep covered up - my giblets are my business, observational purposes or otherwise Grin

PacificDogwod · 20/11/2015 17:00

Is now the time to regale you all with the story of how I took my then-boyfriend/now-DH to a v posh Roman bath in Germany? Ancient site, lovely mosaics all round, lots of 'Old Money' - and us Grin.
It only occurred to me to tell DH as we paid at the entrance that it was all nekkid and mixed.
He went a bit Shock, then gulped and went in - I will give him credit for this forever.
It was segregated changing rooms, we were supplied with huge fluffy towels and a thorough and naked shower (with proper washing) was compulsory expected. We then met again (with towels artfully draped over relevant bits) outside the changing rooms - only to be confronted by an older gentleman with a hindquarter amputation (leg missing including the buttock/pelvis) and the most horrific chest/back scarring. He was quite at home in the place, suggested where we should start and then wandered off with the help of his crutch. We later had a fascinating conversation with him in one of the more temperate resting pools about his injuries (WW2 - what else) and the baths (he lived in one of the v posh flats above the place) and Life In General.
The whole thing was a great experience.

I agree that not every sauna experience is totally asexually, but IME the social pressure for appropriate behaviour is usually obeyed. And ANY epilation is just…. Shock

I don't actually like sauna's all that much btw.

BertrandRussell · 20/11/2015 17:00

Wel, you know what they say- foreigners start at Calais (or in this case, Strasbourg) and stop at nothing..........

Archfarchnad · 20/11/2015 17:04

Statements like "people don't care what you look like, nothing sexual about it" are to be taken with a grain of salt in my experience. Friends and I have definitely experienced especially older men staring.

Maybe you're going to the wrong saunas or are in the 'wrong' bit of Germany. Here in Berlin we're all perfectly well behaved, and the clientele is generally very mixed in age and gender. I've honestly heard of anybody being put off by men staring. Or women for that matter. Or genitalia being waved around anywhere. As for big cocks, erm, they ALL look small and shrivelled in a sauna surely, but I don't really look. I used to go to a climbing wall where we always had a sauna afterwards, that particular one was about 75% male, most of them under 40 (ie reflecting the demogrpahic of most climbers), there was no problem being in a sauna with 3 or 4 men I didn't know. The only tension was between people who wanted complete silence and people who thought talking among friends was acceptable - now that led to some REAL arguments.

Most people take a large towel in with them, which is large enough so that if you want to lie down (space allowing) you have enough space for your whole torso, and if you want to sit it will cover your bum, legs and feet. You can use the towel to wrap around you when walking around outside. Then you use the towel too on the recliner while you're relaxing. It would be utterly disgusting to have bare skin sweating onto the wood of the sauna - about as disgusting as wearing a swimming costume that you sweat into and then possibly go swimming in afterwards. Ewww.

Whoever asked about the protocol for a steam room, where you obviously can't take a towel in with you: The steam room has a hose in there. When you arrive you wash down the section of seating you want to use so it's completely clean.

"The funny thing about Germans is that in the sauna they happily cavort naked, yet when going outside between about November and April they have 365 layers of Tchibo undergarments and overgarments on, so no centimetre of skin is exposed." True, it's funniest of all with the small babies under those huge duvets. But to be fair, it does get bloody cold here and central heating is a fairly recent innovation, so for older people the only option for survival was wearing a lot in winter. Presumably the sauna was their only option for getting nekkid properly for months on end. Talking of Tchibo, their ski stuff is out [[http://www.tchibo.de/skibekleidung-ski-outfits-t400059466.html this week]. If you want to stock up on your 365 layers. I can recommend the microfleece Sturmhaube.

"I remember in the 70's camping in Scotland, went to the toilet block and there was a German lady starkers with foot up on the sink giving her fanjo a through going over." I think that was the 1970s rather than anything else. It would be a bit extreme these days, even in Germany. A perfunctory going-over, fine, but a thorough going-over should be reserved for a private cubicle or home.

SirChenjin · 20/11/2015 17:05

But you still know that there's every chance some bloke/woman is looking at your nekkid bits, even if they're not actually doing anything??! Shock

British, uptight and proud. Thank you very much.

Archfarchnad · 20/11/2015 17:06

Good grief, I didn't check that last post. The first paragraph was a quote from a PP, and then it should be:

I've honestly never heard of anybody being put off by men staring.

ItchyArmpits · 20/11/2015 17:07

when in Rome

I'd be very surprised to hear that Italians are into mixed nude public saunas tbh.

(It's over a decade since I lived there, maybe things have changed)

Archfarchnad · 20/11/2015 17:12

Well, obviously that's your prerogative to be uptight and proud. I don't really get why you're proud of having a negative characteristic, but one of the wonderful things about the world is that we're all just so different Smile.

"you still know that there's every chance some bloke/woman is looking at your nekkid bits, even if they're not actually doing anything" Well they can't be looking all that much or I'd notice. And since I'm neither proud nor ashamed of my naked body - it's just there, being, existing, neither positive nor negative - why should I be worried if someone looks at it a bit?

itsmine · 20/11/2015 17:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

reni2 · 20/11/2015 17:17

I don't like random strangers' nakedness, but I also see all manner of unpleasant bacteria and fungi doing the limbo and multiplying in places where the sun don't shine covered in lycra swimsuits.

SirChenjin · 20/11/2015 17:17

I was being facetious, referencing the comparisons between cultures on here, and poking gentle fun at myself - something the Brits are very good at. I don't really get why you didn't understand that, but as your say - we're all just so different Smile

If you don't mind blokes looking at your naked breasts or genitalia, then that's your look out. I do - and that's mine. Should you be worried? I can't answer that - I wouldn't presume to tell you how you should feel about it.

Whathaveilost · 20/11/2015 17:19

I am currently in a hotel complexion a European country and have been swimming every day. I was looking forward to going in the sauna until I saw the nude only signs!!

I wish I could get rid of some of my inhibitions!!

RiverTam · 20/11/2015 17:24

I love how people are getting aerated about this woman not doing the done thing in the UK when Brits abroad have been ignoring and trampling over local customs for centuries. Bout time we got a taste of our own medicine.

MistressoftheYoniverse · 20/11/2015 17:25

sweat isn't dirty...well only if you are dirty already Hmm

ThoughtfulBird · 20/11/2015 17:28

If I was in a naked sauna I would do nothing but stare at the cocks on display.

I love cocks, me.

SirChenjin · 20/11/2015 17:29

Mmm..not sure that the Germans have behaved much better over the centuries Tam.

MistressoftheYoniverse · 20/11/2015 17:32

Grin Bird I know I would look...might even do a couple of 'head surveys' strictly for observational purposes of course!

Archfarchnad · 20/11/2015 17:34

"I was being facetious, referencing the comparisons between cultures on here, and poking gentle fun at myself"

Oh, were you, I missed that altogether. Grin I became a German citizen recently and had to hand in my sense of humour at the same time. Ever since then I've had problems identifying particularly subtle forms of humour such as facetiousness. Do forgive.

"If you don't mind blokes looking at your naked breasts or genitalia," Actually the point is that I don't think they ARE looking that much. If they were obviously staring of course I would feel uneasy because that's anti-social behaviour, and would either complain to the management or go to female-only sauna sessions. Being uptight about bodies actually makes society a much more unpleasant place as a whole, I think. It's also a vicious circle: there's less nudity in the UK, so when there are naked bodies loads of men start staring presumably, which makes the women more self-conscious and then they cover up, which makes the men more intent on seeing nudity because it's unusual, and so the cycle goes on and on.

On the other hand, prudery can be hilarious to watch in action. There is nothing funnier than the sight of Irish people going swimming in the Irish Sea at Forty Foot just outside Dublin. There's nowhere to change so people get into real contortions with their towels when changing just so that nobody might see a stray ball or boob - as a result it takes ages to change and is the most inelegant thing ever.

"Still not getting the sweating into a swimming cozzie disgust. Others nakedness is far more repelling" Now are you being serious here or is it that 'humour' thing, poking gentle fun, etc mentioned above? Gwan, give me a clue.

DyslexicScientist · 20/11/2015 17:36

Wow. Ibdont think sweating in a biki is that bad. Its only for a very shot time its not like your wearing it for the rest of the day and have a plunge pool afterwards. No different than sweating when dam ng all night or working out.

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 20/11/2015 17:39

Sweating into a swimsuit = disgusting
Sweating into a towel =absolutely fine
apparently

BoffinMum · 20/11/2015 17:40

The thing about the mammoth cocks is probably a bit like going into somewhere and realising someone has three legs, or three nipples, or something. It's a subconscious thing grabbing your attention, and then your inner voice shouts "O.M.G.!! LOOK AT THAT!!" whilst you try to maintain a degree of external sang froid (difficult in a sauna, admittedly). I have to say I think in the two particular cases I am thinking of, there was definitely a degree of provocative and deliberate alpha male cock draping by middle aged men.

Whathaveilost, Just wrap a bath towel around you. That is allowed. It will be fine.

SirChenjin, my family looks pretty Viking as well. I think we all appreciate there was not a lot of telly in North Lincolnshire in 1100 and the Vikings were the most exciting thing to happen for a long while, so it was bound to happen.