To want to pummel DH...

[Gatehouse77]

...for the most irritatingly, unnecessarily noisy way he gulps his fucking tea?

I have always known that his about him - I simply cannot sit next to him when he's drinking tea (I say tea because that's what he drinks 97% of the time) because it sends me into a rage but apart from sitting on my bed, which I don't want to do - could that constitute me being unreasonable? - I have little choice. Normally, I don't sit so near him but pesky kids are lolling on the alternatives atm.

Oh, and you can forget having tea in bed in the mornings (a suggestion by him on a rare weekend morning that we don't have to get up and on with something) because it would start my day with rage. RAGE, I tell you!

Husband's nose whistles when we're watching TV

Titsywoo
Both my dh and my best friend have jaws that click when they eat.

My jaw clicks, too. Not something I can actually change, tbh. Lucky for me, DP and the DCs think it's funny.

Must admit I'm now drinking tea wondering if I'm making a loud noise.

I used to sit next to a guy at work who would slurp down a bowl of cereal each morning and you'd hear the spoon against his teeth every time he put it in his mouth. The slurping was bad enough but why bite the spoon?! And he was one of those people who breathes really heavily when he eats, like he struggles to both breathe and eat. He was a joy.

I drink all hot drinks really noisily. I luxuriate in the anticipatory in draw of breath as the mug approaches my mouth, the slurp, the swill around the mouth, the loud double gulp then a long sigh of pleasure. After every mouthful. It sends DH into a murderous fury, which has the unfortunate side effect of making me snort hot coffee out of my nose. Our marriage survives only because he brings my coffee to me in bed and I courteously don't start drinking it til he is out of earshot. I've tried drinking quietly but it's just not as pleasurable!

My dad breathes really heavily through his nose whilst eating. It drives me MAD. Shut up!! Breathe normally!!

These little tales of domesticity are making me laugh. A welcome distraction from yesterday's events.

My grandmother used to clip us round the back of the head (Gibbs style for any NCIS fans ) if we did the loud exhale after a drink!

Oh, and don't get me started on those that clank their cutlery! Lips not teeth!!

I had a very strict upbringing...can you tell?!

When my Mum got fed up of us eating with wings - elbows up high - she made us eat with books under our arms . And to stop my sister eating with her mouth open she had to eat in front of a mirror so she had to see what we all did!

Lastly, my eldest brother used to lean down to his food ("Food to your mouth, bot mouth to your food!") she got him to eat with a snooker cue threaded behind his back and through the crook of his arms so he couldn't bend!

Sod LTB, KTB!

A close friend of mine is a real lip smacked when she eats. And DH is a crunchy chomper

Rage indeed

Ds(8) drives me insane with his gulping of drinks and eating with his mouth open! It's like sitting next to a concrete mixer sometimes. Soundtrack to mealtimes in our house is this interspersed with cries of 'close your mouth!!' from me and dh.

DH chews in his sleep. So loudly that it can wake me up if, miraculously, I've fallen asleep before him. One day, I will smother him with the pillow