To get annoyed that DH's idea of housework is just moving stuff around?

[starsandstars]

He piles things up, shoves things into cupboards, piles things on windowsills etc. But no actual cleaning or proper tidying is ever done.

I was out at work for 12 hours on Saturday and when I got home I was met with a "Ta Da" type flourish. Literally all he had done was move things around; a pile of washing from the top of the tumble dryer had been put in the hallway upstairs. Kids toys in the lounge just put in a pile rather than taken up upstairs. Things had just been piled up neatly on the worktop rather than put away in cupboards. No hoovering, no dusting, no cleaning of kitchen or bathrooms,just a bizarre move around of stuff.

And before anyone says I should be grateful he does anything at all, I'll point out we are both fully functioning adults, both working full time

Washing doesn't need to be put away! You can take the clothes you want to wear as easily (well easier really, unless it's under clothes you rarely wear) from a pile than from inside a wardrobe.

But yes, if he'll later moan that it's not put away, then fair enough, he's a git and YANBU.

Ugh. My DH has form for this too.

"Tidying" the kids toys away by throwing them in a huge heap into drawers, when they all have places to be, so bits aren't lost for next time.

Asking me plaintively if I know where the X is - where it's always been, where it lives, which is usually in a blindingly obvious place you've taken it from many times before, perhaps?

Accusing me of "moving" something when it's been lying around on a surface for days waiting to be put away by its owner until I crack...

"Soaking" the dishes, see also "stacking the plates near the dishwasher" and "moving the rubbish near the bin that needs emptying".

Requiring praise/acknowledgement for hoovering/washing up etc. like a child that needs encouragement when no one else me gets a pat on the back for mundane everyday tasks.

Gah. I am not a great housekeeper, it does not come naturally to me, but it would come a damn sight more natural if the other adult in the house was a bit more proactive and a bit less faux-helpless in the domestic sphere.

Disclaimer: I may be unreasonably riled tonight by the pizza-on-the-base-of-the-over fiasco...

Ex husband used to this sweep the floor into pile in the corner for me to clean up.
Put away his clothes leave everyone elses
Take 3 hours to iron his 5 shirts not the boys shirt as that was my job.
Take all afternoon to do the washing up on a Sunday.

Put every into piles so you could find stuff.
Broke our marriage

My husband tidies things into black sacks and puts them in the garage. Then tells me to tidy the mess in the garage.

If you knew the number of times he has lost his valuable things (he put in said black sack....)

Lists lists lists were my solution here. My dh did stuff like yours op. I put a list on the back of a kitchen cupboard door. I said it was for anyone doing stuff particularly the older kids but it was really for him. The improvement is immense. I go to do something and it's already done. At last! I won't say how many years it took but older kids might be a hint.