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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

New neighbours...am I overreacting?

84 replies

3sugarsplease · 09/11/2015 13:25

Last week we had new neighbours move next door to us. We live in a semi detached house and our house and the new neighbours house are the only homes at the end of the drive - with a little courtyard where we have two car parking spaces each.

On the day they moved in. 5 cars descended outside our house blocking our car in aswell as a removal man. No one came to our door introduced themselves, said hello - nothing. It was only when we needed to leave the house that I had to ask them to move their car so we could leave. Upon our return our car parking space has turned into their own private rubbish heap - broken chairs, ripped up carpet, electric cables etc. Our other space keeps being occupied my another one of their cars. I don't feel comfortable parking down the drive on the road as its busy street and I can't get our 14 week old DS out of the car in his seat.

It's day 5 now and the constant banging is driving me bonkers (granted I'm sleep deprived) but they are drilling up until 9pm at night. It's hard getting DS down for naps and when he goes down at 7 he's woken up but the drilling/banging.

It's now 5 days in... AIBU to pop round for a polite word?

OP posts:

Gottagetmoving · 09/11/2015 15:44

I'd have been over there the second they blocked my car in and put their shit in my parking space. 'Hi, I'm OP, your neighbour. One of your cars is in my spot. It needs to be moved

Exactly!
OP should know whether it is her spot or not. Why do people not know these things when they buy a house?
Assuming OP knows this, there is no.point waiting to see if people become more considerate eventually.
The new neighbours have shown who they are - they are people who do as they please without so much as showing any concern or courtesy toward OP.
You have to let people know you don't tolerate this attitude. You don't have to be aggressive or rude. Just firm.

Gottagetmoving · 09/11/2015 15:48

Also, you don't ASK people to move their car from your property or explain you have a baby.
They are not doing you a favour.

NewLife4Me · 09/11/2015 16:09

I would check out the council for the noise as 6pm is late enough for some councils.
It is not the fault of the law if the home owners work until 6pm, in fact they can either take time off or pay a builder to do the work.
Why should people be put out because of others working hours?
This is as irrelevant as having a baby.

I'd mention that there are 2 spaces each and if junk covers one of yours could you use one of theirs instead.

Idefix · 09/11/2015 16:12

You need to be brave and pop over and lay the ground rules regarding your car parking spaces, don't let what is happening become the norm. I imagine your landlord will be able to tell you if the spaces are allocated to you he may want to charge them rent for the spaces if they keep doing this .

I think drilling till 9pm after full day of banging and other building work is very unreasonable. Would say where I live in Europe there are very strict rules on noise and people have a legal right to quite for long periods during the and evening so I might out of sync there.

Original poster

3sugarsplease · 09/11/2015 16:16

Sorry for the delay - these are our spaces as there was this confusion when we moved in with another neighbour who accesses her back garden via the front courtyard as to who the spaces belong to. She's also a stickler for rules. My landlord (no letting agent) had the deeds and showed us our allocated spaces. Maybe it's a case of going to hers and getting them and showing them to neighbours.

So far they don't sound considerate... I've always been super respectful of our neighbours, if the dogs bark, I bring them in front the garden, il turn music off in cars before pulling up outside, I turn the television down at 10 etc.

OP posts:

Lariflete · 09/11/2015 16:16

Agree with expat
We occasionally have trouble with people doing this; our house is the only one with a dropped kerb and drive on our side of the road, so don't really understand why people think it's ok.

As soon as I see it, I go out and politely tell them to move. I think I'm seen as a bit of a pita by the neighbours a couple of doors down who seem to constantly have friends who do it, but tbh they've stopped doing it and so I don't care.

Original poster

3sugarsplease · 09/11/2015 16:19

Also they are no builders, haven't seen any builders, vans, tools etc.

They could be laying new flooring, shelves, skirting boards etc. Whilst I appreciate this work must be done I still find it rude they wouldn't even knock on the door and say we have just moved in, doing a little DIY, blah blah blah

OP posts:

PeasinPod1 · 09/11/2015 16:25

3 sugars, great you know for sure these are your spaces. Is the rubbish still there/cars often in your space?

ButterflyUpSoHigh · 09/11/2015 16:35

I would see them about the parking. The DIY though they are not being unreasonable. Everyone does that when they move in it's to be expected. I know it is annoying. We had new neighbours who drilled and banged day and night for 6 weeks.

goodnightdarthvader1 · 09/11/2015 16:40

A polite word may be all that's necessary - I advise against going in all guns blazing.

My DH and I moved into a second floor flat. No DIY (we were renting), but one morning after we'd been there about a week, the Sky man turned up to install the satellite dish, at 7.30am. He was earlier than we were expecting but not early enough to be a real nuisance, so we thought. He started drilling, went out to his van to get some supplies, and the grumpy neighbour downstairs (no DC, just his girlfriend, never seemed to leave the house for work, either of them) sprinted upstairs ranting and raving about the unreasonable hour and threatened to lock the workman out. We politely explained this was a one off and he stormed back to his flat.

Before moving in with my DH, I lived in a top floor flat, shared the floor with another woman (separate flats). I emptied my bin bag and put it outside my door (studio flat, had a friend staying over, not much space to swing a cat) intended to take it downstairs when we left in 10 mins. It had been outside my door for all of a minute when the woman next door knocked and told me very rudely I needed to take my rubbish downstairs, not leave it on the landing. I explained I was about to do just that, in about 8 minutes.

Granted, your neighbours sound a bit inconsiderate, but it could be a misunderstanding. Before vilifying them or making plans to move, go and (politely) talk to them.

Original poster

3sugarsplease · 09/11/2015 16:41

Peasin - yes the pile of rubbish is still there. It's being added to. I feel like such a moany neighbour...

OP posts:

Original poster

3sugarsplease · 09/11/2015 16:44

Goodnight - I agree. We are moving in January though so if they do continue to be inconsiderate at least we won't have to put up with it for long... And when we move to our new home I will be knocking on next doors house first thing to introduce ourselves and apologise for any disruption we cause polishes halo for being an angel neighbour

OP posts:

Hatethis22 · 09/11/2015 16:48

As you know for sure that they're yours I'd be round there having a word.

Sunnymeg · 09/11/2015 16:52

As you are renting, I would complain to the landlord or your property agent, they can sort it out and have the conversation with the neighbours. When I had a problem with tenants of a nearby property I contacted the landlord and it was resolved in a couple of hours. Good Luck

BeckerLleytonNever · 09/11/2015 17:07

Id say to them ''ddo you know these spaces are allocated? these ones are mine and those are yours.''

or else park in their space.

bloody anti social feckers and diying late into the night too.

id move if I were you, they don't sound nice at all. and the fecker nightmare neighbours always win. theres no justice.

Damselindestress · 09/11/2015 17:07

You need to have a word about the parking space. They clearly haven't realised it's allocated to your property and need to be politely informed or the problem, like the pile of rubbish, is only going to get bigger. Don't let them get into the habit of using your parking space, nip it in the bud. Standing up for yourself is not being a moany neighbour, it is being assertive. YANBU.

roundaboutthetown · 09/11/2015 17:43

Phone the council about fly tipping?

Carmelasoprano · 09/11/2015 20:58

No you have the patience of a saint! What appalling manners. Put a note through their door, keep a copy.
We have new neighbours, surly, entitled and rude. They didn't have the courtesy to inform us of pending works which were meant to last two weeks...12 weeks of misery later and no apology for the morning, late evening and weekend drilling and banging.
We no longer acknowledge each other which suits me...we will be renting the house out soon as a HMO plus we know that a commercial building right at the back of their home will be demolished soon and a block of flats will be built directly overlooking their garden! We won't be opposing the application....

LimboNovember · 09/11/2015 21:06

Maybe it's a case of going to hers and getting them and showing them to neighbours

Its without doubt a case of this can you own LL do this???

As for them knocking on your door, actually its a two way thing, maybe they thought you might knock, maybe they just dont care.

Either way its a PERFECT opportunity to go round ( with a bottle and flowers or something) be really sweet and kind, and say hi, been frantic, seen coming and going but not had a chance to properly introduce.

then by the way, its not clear I know but that drive is ours, and we need it, would it be at all possible to clear the rubbish or can dh help you>

THEN you say BTW I know these walls are THIN and we can hear everything, please let us know if the baby gets too loud!we are conscious of the noise you may hear...similairy, do you think you have much more DIY to do....

LimboNovember · 09/11/2015 21:07

But you must act now whatever you do, as pp said once htey get into the habit and used to doing it they think its theirs and your stopping them from using theirs....stop it now.

maddening · 09/11/2015 21:14

Knock on, tell them to move the rubbish by the end of the day and that you require access to your parking at all times.

CFSsucks · 09/11/2015 22:34

It's your parking space, tell them to move their stuff! They are being extremely inconsiderate. I think banging until 9pm is not on either.

amarmai · 10/11/2015 02:18

As you're leaving there,this is a good opportunity to practice faking it until you make it-standing up for yourself i mean.

roundaboutthetown · 10/11/2015 08:07

Go round with a bottle of wine, tell them welcome to the neighbourhood and, oh, by the way, would they mind moving their rubbish from your parking space, so that you can park your car by your house? And then, if they refuse, phone the council to inform them that your neighbours are illegally dumping rubbish. Sorted.

Helmetbymidnight · 10/11/2015 08:11

I wouldn't go round with a bottle of wine.

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