Ok, so I'll start by saying I completely acknowledge I don't have the monopoly on hard times. And that I have a home, DC and a reasonable income which is more than some.
But I also have no family (only child, parents died in my early 20s, grandparents before I was 10). 2 DC by 2 different men, eldest has no contact with his father or family, never has had. Younger sees his dad regularly. His dad, my Ex, was physically and emotionally abusive to me for years. He also stole tens of thousands from me and hasn't paid a penny since we split. I was with him for 8 years, wanted to leave for 7 but had no help/ no one to turn to.
No one believed me about the abuse. When we split up people said what a shame and that the abuse was just 'ups and downs'. I called the police on him more than once, they refused to intervene. His family said I was a liar, accused me of hitting the DC, and of stealing money. They threatened to report me to the police, which would have cost me my job. Luckily, it was an empty threat.
No one I know has ever acknowledged what an arse my Ex was, let alone said I did well to get away. Similarly I don't get anyone telling me I'm doing a good job managing as a lone parent. Instead I was told it was my fault my eldest DC failed the 11plus, I'm so clever I should have made him study. And also I should have made him do better in his exams, again that's my fault. And it's my fault both DC have missed school, even though the school haven't always told me when they're not there, and when they often have to leave after I leave for work (again that's my fault for working because obviously I should be there to take them every day even though they're in their teens. When my younger DC was in yr5, I was told it was a safeguarding issue that I wanted him to walk home from school alone (15-20 min walk) and the school insisted I got him a mobile phone. After saying it would be better if I got his grandparents to collect him if I couldn't (I explained they were dead, asked if an aunt could...they patently didn't believe me when I said I was an only child). And that's just the tip of the iceberg.
I've just had enough of everything being my fault. I'm only one person, I have no help, bit however many times I make that clear, I never seem to get any leeway. I work ft (in a job I don't even really like any more, but I can't afford to leave), I have to travel with work sometimes overnight, I have no family to help, and no friends who would put themselves out to. I do the best I can. Yet it's never good enough.
And then I look around at others (yes I know you can't judge blah blah), who get divorced, no abuse just fall out of love etc, and there's family and friends all rallying round about how sad it is, they get plenty of maintenance so dont need to work ft, and yet it's all violins about how hard it is for them. No one ever says that to me, and I'm so sick and tired of it.
And if one time the school, or my employers, or anyone I know just said 'bloody hell, that's tough' it would make a real difference. Let alone if anyone actually offered me help.