to be concerned my friend drank a bottle and a half of wine and 10 vodkas in the house on her own on Saturday night.

[FedUpWithJudgementalPeople]

She doesn't drink every day but she binge drinks like this probably once a month.

She doesn't remember various texts she sent while drunk this time. Horrible texts (not to me - to someone else).

I'm concerned but also annoyed with her. She is acting like this is all fine - just a blip apparently.

EatShit - so you think it's ok to have blackouts and not remember what you've said or done or texted someone? I shouldn't be worried by that?!!!

The content of the texts was horrible - she could get reported to the police for harassment basically. The texts weren't to me but I am sad my lovely sweet friend is sending texts like that at all.

Regardless of how big the measures of vodka are, and how many she drunk, your friend would know how much is left in the bottle. I would bet she's drunk most of the bottle. Maybe left an inch.

There're 28 units in a bottle of dark rum (40%) and 40 in a litre.

Can't you see the difference between having a couple of drinks a night for a couple of weeks and having them all in one go?

It's the same impact on your body whether you drink alone or in company, U2.

Of course it does Imperial. Someone drinking that much on their own worries me more than someone relatively young drinking that much on a night out. Both equally as dangerous of course.

As a very light drinker I don't really understand what on earth is fun about drinking so much and waking up feeling like crap.

Derek If you talk to medical professionals they will tell you that it is much more harmful to 'save' your units and drink them in one binge, than to drink a small amount at regular intervals.

Your way of drinking is dangerous, whether you like it or not.

I'd be more worried about what she's doing when she's drinking, i.e sending texts and ruining friendships, then I would be about what she's drinking.

I've had friends who drink at different levels, some can drink quite a bit in one go, and still remain the same people, or at least not act so ridiculous that they lose friendships or cause real problems. I've other friends who have two drinks and become nasty or really wreckless. It's those ones that worry me.

good god. That is verging on rock star death territory and it is a REAL risk.

the ho-ho-so-funny-I-can't-remember thing is actually brain damage, which is not really that hilarious, is it?

as others note, no-one can help her unless she accepts help.

You're right to be concerned, but there's not much you can do about it unfortunately.

You can tell her that you're concerned for her physical and mental wellbeing, and maybe she will take that on board, and maybe she won't - it's up to her.

I'm a former 'problem drinker/alcoholic' OP.
I would be very surprised if she's not drinking smaller amounts at other times, as well.
Yes, she is risking her health, alongside the social risks of sending abusive texts. Does she use social media as well? Not a wise thing to do when drunk.
There's not much to add really. I would suggest you show her this thread, but she would probably just notice EatshitDerek's post to validate her drinking and ignore all the others.

Has she read the texts she sent? If so, how did she react?

I think it does matter that she's drinking this much alone, too. I know the physical effect isn't any different, but there are so many factors that can increase your intake when drinking socially (everyone buying rounds; people insisting on shots; someone buying doubles when you think you're getting singles; drinking games; peer pressure; social anxiety; special price offers; closing time approaching; plain old having a great time and just not noticing how much you're putting away)... and it's so different from just sitting there, alone, and working through a huge amount of alcohol. No conversation, no encouragement. You and the bottle. Very depressing.

I too am surprised she wasn't very sick. Tell her you're worried and then - let it go.

the other reason it matters drinking alone is that there isn't anyone to clear the vomit from your throat or notice you've stopped breathing.

two words: Amy Winehouse.

She told me she was v v hungover so I asked what she'd had drink. I was slightly shocked by the response. If she'd said a bottle and a half of wine I would have thought that was quite a lot, never mind the vodkas!!
I don't think I'd really realised until now quantities - like I knew she binged sometimes but was taken a back but the sheer volume of booze she'd got through.

On the texts she is cringing but when I said to her that if someone had sent her those texts I would be telling her to go to the police she got a bit defensive.
She's read back some of the texts but others she says she's deleted as she doesn't want to look at them.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-32798569

Interesting experiment comparing binge drinking with daily drinking over a month. Note how dangerously drunk on of the twins becomes after consuming his weeks units in one go.
"But when we looked at all the readings we'd taken, he'd clearly been in a dangerous state the night before. He was actually at his worst a few hours after we'd gone to sleep, when the level of alcohol in his blood was, according to the text books, enough to put him at danger of death. "

Your friend is playing with fire consuming that much in one go.

That's a huge amount by any standards op, but yes I do believe it's significant that she drinks like that alone in particular. Apart from anything else it's hugely dangerous and she risks choking on her own vomit with nobody there to take care of her. Blackouts are bad news too, but particularly if she's doing silly things that impact on her personal relationships, such as sending abusive texts. Dsis has a history of doing this when she's had a few and it has certainly damaged relationships along the way. I'm no angel and have blacked out in the past. I'd always end up remembering though (and cringing) until about 18 months ago when I overstepped my own limit doing shots. I still haven't recovered my memory of that evening and thankfully I was among trusted friends but anything could have happened and I wouldn't have known. It scared me immensely and I haven't got drunk since. I always thought i knew my limits but shorts shots are the devil's work!

I have a friend who always doubles the amount she drinks when telling others about it. (I know because we've been out together on several occasions, and I know exactly what we drunk and exactly what she told people we'd drunk the next day). If she has behaved badly, she will triple it.

I would be more worried about the behaviour than the alcohol, tbh.

I have a friend who always doubles the amount she drinks when telling others about it.

How unusual!

shovetheholly most people do the opposite. They either underestimate, forget or deliberately lie. As for the behaviour, personality changes when drinking are a sign of problem drinking.

OK, some context. I should add that we used to work together in an extremely liberal environment where it was quite normal to drink very heavily and be out from end of work until 4am with colleagues! Quite unlike most workplaces I hear about on Mumsnet!

I used to drink like that. In between binges I drank heavily. Once I started I couldn't stop. That's probably why I luckily ended up in aa and 4 years sober. I would be worried.

Good god! All that and she wasn't in A&E!?

Drinking that amount on a big night out would be way OTT. To do it at home alone is worrying, and I would say a sign of a real problem. It goes far beyond a bit of a binge and is into real danger area.