surely I'm not unreasonable?!

[HunterHearstHelmsley]

My sister and her partner are living with me at the moment. They had friends over yesterday evening (fine but prior warning would have been nice!)

Friends arrived with two Boxer dogs. I wasn't particularly pleased as I think it's incredibly rude to turn up with your dogs but anyway I thought ok and put up with it.

Until... I was "told" (not asked) to put my cats out as the dogs don't like them. This was met with a HELL NO. Guests weren't impressed and put their dogs in the car and didn't stay long.

I've been informed I'm a terrible host and should have turfed the cats out. I think I wasn't a bloody host and i'm not putting the cats out for visiting dogs.

Mumsnet jury, please?!

Yanbu of course. But is it possible your sister told them that the dogs would be fine and the cats could be put out? That might put a different spin on the request.

I think that she is forgetting who's home it actually is and unless you put your foot down, it will likely get worse with you being made to feel like the guest.

Maybe it's time that she moved on for the sake of your future relationship

it's bad enough that your sister didn't ask your permission for guests - I take it from your update it's not a formal, everyone equal house share arrangement - because again, the guest shouldn't have guests!! but if she knew about the dogs and said fine...

yes, short sharp shock time. I am definitely thinking that the guests were the ones who had no idea what the real situation was btw.

Well, I'd have laughed at whoever it is who told you to put the cats out. A lot. And your sister needs some stern words sent her way. Refusing to be ordered around in your own home by guests you didn't invite does NOT make you a bad host. Their problem is that you haven't rolled over and obeyed.

Not unreasonable in the slightest, are you kidding??
Your home, not theirs! Its rude enough to turn up with a pair of dogs but to actually ask you to put the cats outside is unbelievable.

AshleyWilkes!! Dreams, dreams always dreams with you, never common sense.!!! (sorry)

But you weren't their host anyway, were you? In my book you could only have been their host if you had invited them. You are simply the owner of the house in which the person who invited them is living. As such, it is your sister who is the bad host as she should have told them from the outset that they couldn't bring their dogs.

I love dogs but it is absolutely not OK to bring them to someone's house without asking if it's ok. My OH's friend once dropped round with his very very energetic sheepdog.... cue my poor rescue cats who took ages to get used to humans and were very very nervous at the time going mental trying to escape out of the kitchen, windows were shut so they kept leaping up at a shut window then falling in the sink repeatedly before I could let them out in their panic :-( . just no.

My mum regularly brings her crazy dog with her, and its fine as my crazy dog loves him coming round however she asks every single time - I've never said no -yet- but she checks incase I'm not feeling the madness that day. You are definitely NBU your house, your rules, your cats!!

YANBU

The people / animals who live there trump visitors. My mil is looking after a dog for six months. My DS hates dogs and gets frightened. I'm not keen. Hence we don't visit unless we are invited and dog is removed. But I don't force us on them either. So my mil can choose its up to her as its her house.

christina!if you prefer the relationship with your dogs rather than your niece that's fine!

Wow... unanimous!

Sister is something of a nightmare... I'm one of the few people who tells her where to get off so there's always a strop if she doesn't get her own way (she's a lot younger than me). She's paying a very minimal amount due to having no money (her fault) which I'll put up with as long as she doesn't behave stupidly.

Perhaps you'd like to remind her of her option to move out, pay the market rate for lodgers/flat shares and enjoy all that that brings.

YANBU

But she is behaving stupidly, clearly she is.

First I wouldn't allow anyone to bring their dogs round unless they had asked before.

I don't like cats, however I can't believe anyone would think turfing the cats that live there put so someones dogs can run around the house is ok.

Why would you take your dogs to someone's house who you don't know?

She's a bit of a pisstaker tbh, if she were my guest, she would have been told this morning I would like her to look into other places to live. She's taken advantage of your kindness.