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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not get the big fuss over homes for ex serviceman?

64 replies

LibidinousSwine · 24/10/2015 19:24

Admittedly I don't know anyone who would be in need of one so perhaps my view is one-sided. I'm happy to be educated if that's the case.

So why the hype? Our fire and police service personnel risk their lives for us on a daily basis yet there's no clamour for them to be showered with respect and free housing.

Forces veterans who are badly injured I believe can be badly let down on return to the UK which is scandalous. What I'm on about is the perfectly able bodied veterans who have finished a paid career in the forces and now come to retirement age, yet seem to have not managed to plan for this (despite knowing, often for years in advance, when their term would end) Perhaps my view is overly simplistic but as I said, I just don't get it.

OP posts:

HeySoulSister · 24/10/2015 20:12

Oh right. So who should the criteria be applied to then?

HeySoulSister · 24/10/2015 20:12

I can sympathise with that sparkly

Original poster

LibidinousSwine · 24/10/2015 20:13

dontask I didn't mean to imply that you were feckless because you are not on the ladder now. Simply that after a term of twenty odd years surely it is possible to have saved a few thousand pounds so you can at least rent a house when the time comes?
And all these veterans who have never paid a bill or fed themselves? What did they do on leave and before they joined up?

OP posts:

museumum · 24/10/2015 20:15

I live near a barracks and have 100% sympathy for forces families of relatively non-senior army. They move a lot. They often need to rent for their family. The spouses often can't work due to the upheaval.
Around here there's no way they could buy an investment property and rent a family home as income from renting out barely covers mortgage repayments and certainly not all the maintenance and decoration required to rent out long term.
There aren't actually all that many "live-in" jobs for people with families outside the forces and none other I'm aware of that require regular movement around the country and Europe for the family.

BertieBotts · 24/10/2015 20:18

Anybody can apply for social housing. You don't have to be in need. The reality is of course that only those in need have any chance of getting close because the lists are so long. This is because we don't have enough houses. The number of people applying hasn't risen (any more than population has risen).

no73 · 24/10/2015 20:21

But they aren't getting free housing though are they??

Help for Veterans housing means they are being part of a special community to help them rehabilitate and learn skills to help them overcome their mental health and/or physical problems from being in some very nasty war zones.

Would you really deny someone with only one working limb left some special form of housing and sense of community with other soldiers??

Your DSS might be lucky in the support he had from family. He may not have bad PTSD that has stopped him from finding employment. He has all his limbs.

I am not sure where you have got this 'free' housing from as it is not happening. Service personal move around so much that they have lost ties to their former home county. The council in their childhood town will not put them on their waiting list as they have not lived their in previous years. The council of the town their last post was will not put them on their waiting list as they have no ties to that area apart from being stationed there.

Others may have not managed to save as their wives do not work due to constantly being moved around, having young children with no family support around. They may have to pay maintenance to previous children/wives, half their pension payout may have to go to ex wives meaning their is not much left to save.

You must really live in a very cherished world that you can not even think about why some people may not have been able to buy a house. The job market is not great, some service personal haven't gone far up the career ladder so their pension will not enormous. Plus no amount of deposit is going to get you a mortgage if you haven't got paid employment.

dontaskdonttell · 24/10/2015 20:22

Sparkly, it's a nightmare! I have 2 small kids and another on the way so I'm not in a position to be looking right now but I know how hard it is! Plus, moving all the time, people see regular moves all over the country on your cv and won't even interview you!!

I'm not saying all military should go to the top of the housing, not at all. But for those who are the most vulnerable with drug or alcohol problems, ptsd or other mental health problems or injuries, that are a direct result of their service, should absolutely receive help.

Personally I think there should be teams who deal with this, military or in councils or government. Their specific role should be dealing with those veterans who are vulnerable and need help. There should be special units, like house shares etc where they are with other people who understand, but are also helped to get jobs, to learn to live in the civilian world they left behind long ago.

maryann1975 · 24/10/2015 20:26

My DH did 22 years in the military (he finished as a sergent in the raf on £30k+) and we were able to plan for the future and save so when he left the forces we were in a position to buy our own home. We were lucky that 'home' is an area that we could afford to buy in though. If we had wanted to move to a very expensive area (anywhere in the south I guess) we wouldnt have had the funds to do this in the same way teachers/police/nurses struggle to buy their own homes.
We had military friends (similar rank/pay scale) who didn't save for their future and spent all their disposable income on having a good life at the time. (Married quarters rent is much cheaper than private rents/average morgagte payments, we took this saving and used it as a house deposit). They then bought good cars/expensive holidays with their lump sum pension and then complain they can't afford anywhere to live. On the other hand, I had a friend who, with her DH were the first in their families to buy their own home thanks to him being in the military and earning a good wage.

Our forces do deserve help and the ones who are suffering deserve every bit of help they get (and then some). But help shouldn't be universal just because someone is a veteran. I know soldiers who managed a whole career going nowhere except california for three months, twice. To compare the danger they faced to someone who went and did six month tours to Iraq/Afghanistan six times is quite insulting. Help should always be given to those who deserve it, but just becasue you have served, this shouldn't be the only question before you are given somewhere to live.

AnyoneFucoffee · 24/10/2015 20:28

perhaps my view is slightly clouded by DSS who was in the forces (tours in NI and Afghanistan) and now works as a civilian. He and his wife have managed to buy a house and raise a family with relative ease, probably due to careful planning and a lot of family support while he was away. I suppose not everyone is that focused or fortunate?

DH and I managed to buy a house and raise a family with no family support whatsoever.

Not everyone is as fortunate as us.

dementedma · 24/10/2015 20:28

Agree with many of the issues raised here. The serving person is often the only breadwinner in a family as spouses can't hold down a job due to constant moving. Yes, ideally the serving person will plan for the future and put money away for when they transition out, but ideally, we all should be planning for our futures and its easier said than done. It's particularly difficult when dealing with being thousands of miles from home, in a combat zone, and unsure of getting through the next 24 hours.

AnyoneFucoffee · 24/10/2015 20:29

And DH did tours in NI, Iraq and Afghanistan (x4)

HeySoulSister · 24/10/2015 20:32

Op what do you mean by 'never paid a bill or fed themselves'?

HeySoulSister · 24/10/2015 20:32

Do you think they don't have bills then?

HeySoulSister · 24/10/2015 20:33

Or don't go to asda?

Owllady · 24/10/2015 20:39

Gosh some of you are incredibly naive :( life isn't black and white, especially if you've served in Afghanistan
Urgh at this thread. It beggars belief

SparklyTinselTits · 24/10/2015 20:41

Owllady have a drink on me!!

dontaskdonttell · 24/10/2015 20:43

It's hard to read how some people to see forces families and service men and women!!!

SparklyTinselTits · 24/10/2015 20:45

dontask why are you surprised?? After all....our husbands only risk their lives so they can get a free house at the end of it

Crazypetlady · 24/10/2015 20:54

They supported their country in turn it should support them.
I think it's a brilliant scheme worth all of the fuss.

HopefulAnxiety · 24/10/2015 21:09

I'm a pacifist and I think the DIY SOS scheme is bloody brilliant. Just from my own experience with mental illness, it's hell. A community where everyone gets what it's like and can support each other sounds fantastic. Whether I agree with war or not, it doesn't stop me from appreciating the sacrifice members of the forces and their families make, and the upheaval they endure.

PatrickJaneIsRedJohn · 24/10/2015 21:19

If one more person tells me I must be living on a free house I will scream.

I pay more rent for this house via the army grading system then I would pay on the open market.

Yet, it's not the house I'd pick and it's not the location I'd want.

DH is currently away for a month. Just for a bog standard exercise. This is a totally normal occurrence. He will be back for a week then away for another week. When he went on this exercise he'd been back for 3 days from 2 weeks away. How many other jobs have that?

Washediris · 24/10/2015 21:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HeySoulSister · 24/10/2015 21:39

I agree wash

dontaskdonttell · 24/10/2015 22:05

Wise words from wash and Patrick. It's very easy to think you understand our life from watching something on tv for 5 minutes. It can never explain what we go through and all because we fell in love with a soldier.

I stand by my position, so much more needs to be done to help the most vulnerable soldiers.

leccybill · 10/11/2017 20:56

I thought the veteran on this week's episode about the final house in the street for veterans was absolutely lovely, and truly appreciative and deserving of what they'd done for him. Moved me to tears actually. I hope he and his children enjoy their new home.

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