To be having panic attacks at the thought of dd going to stay with IL's alone?

[Realitea]

I do suffer with anxiety so I don't know if my response is normal or not.
IL's live two hours away. Dd is nearly 5 and has stayed there before but always with me and dh or at least just dh.
Mil wants to take dd and have her stay overnight.
Im worried about them forgetting to put up the fire guard, leaving food out that dd could choke on, some of their massive heavy furniture falling on dd as she climbs all the time at the moment! Am I just being irrational?
I don't like the idea of her being there without me or dh supervising her. I'm being made to feel silly. Mil does have her other grand child stay very regularly and she is younger than dd so it's like I'm the odd one out in finding it hard.

She is nearly five. Barring any sort of additional needs she really shouldnt be climbing on furniture, not know to stay away from a hot fire, have trouble chewing her food.

She either has the potential to do all of these, in which case you need to address them, or she doesnt do these and it is just your anxiety which you are going to need to work on.

Op I have a climber too, we have larger pieces of furniture nailed to the walls.

Because it is an issue isnt it, if you have a climber and larger pieces of free standing furniture, maybe if you don't have a climber its hard to understand?

Op, you mention that you never stayed at GP or friends. That is a highly unusual childhood. Not staying with GP because they were dead , is one thing, but never staying with friends ? All of mine were having regular sleepovers with granny from about 3 months. Definitely not with me there. What would be the point ? It's time to spend quality time with DH. Think it's a bit insulting to your mil to have a 'chat' with her about keeping your dd safe, I presume she successfully raised your DH and any siblings.? I would just mention that she is a bit of a climber at the moment- although I agree that at five she shouldn't be doing this and is quite old enough to be warned not to do it at granny's. All in all I think you are projecting your anxiety because you didn't have sleepovers and therefore this is the fear of unknown.

I don't think not staying with grandparents or friends is higly unusual. It wasn't that common when I was a child. The only people my sister and I stayed with were an aunt and uncle in Devon. We loved staying with them.

I only stayed with my nana and an aunt occasionaly growing up staying at friends houses wasnt a thing its not that unusual ime

Another who didn't sleepover with grandparents or friends alone until I was a teenager (family lived 200 miles away so wasn't an option).

DD (5 and also a climber) has had sleepovers with my parents since she was about 3 (years, not months). Hell would freeze over before that happened with the in laws (and not just due to distance).

The op said she never had sleepovers. Not occasionally, or with an aunt and uncle. As for not until 3 yrs think I would have lost the plot with three years without a long night out and a lie in. Dcs have absolutely no memory of them now. There is no award in the long run for not having the odd enjoyable kids free night. The only reward is happy self confident children who can adjust to changing situations.