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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Would this BU?

15 replies

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 23/10/2015 15:47

To give ds his 'share' of the child benefit and get him to fend for himself for a week?

Not next week, as its half term.

He gets a free school dinner every day, so won't starve!

Only for a week, as a lesson. Not forever as a punishment.

But so he can appreciate that steak or prawns for dinner every day isn't sustainable!

He will need to choose a box of cereal and 7 dinners. Milk is always in the fridge. Not going to be that picky!

He thinks he knows everything. WIBU to let him prove it for a week?

OP posts:

hellsbellsmelons · 23/10/2015 16:25

How old is he?
Why would he think steak or prawns are sustainable every day.
Have you taught him about money and what things cost etc...?

SaucyJack · 23/10/2015 16:28

How old is he?

LittleRedSparke · 23/10/2015 16:30

if he is 6 then no, if he is 14 then yes

Original poster

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 23/10/2015 16:34

He is 12.

Yes, he knows we don't have those things every day.

But he has hit the teenage version of the toddler 'I want it ' phase.

He used to be good at meal-planning, but now every meal either has to be a bucket of pasta or a bucket of meat. Maybe a baked bean if we have to eat a vegetable. He loves his veg!

We often have a baked spud with cheese and beans. Perfectly acceptable as Saturday night tea. Reasonably balanced. And cheap! As money is limited, it is a good meal we can all eat (dd is wheat-free). But noooooo. I can't eat THAT. I'll starve. That's not enough. Can I have a whole pack of prawns on it (can't share, I'm allergic)? Can't we get Chinese on the way home instead?

Typical teenage whinges as it isn't his favourite (even though he chooses his fillings!)

OP posts:

SaucyJack · 23/10/2015 16:49

I think it's fine then at his age. In fact, my 8&10 year old's would love the challenge as a one-off.

I assume it'll be done under a bit of supervision tho.

Clobbered · 23/10/2015 16:55

Sounds like he is developing The Hunger. My 11 year old nephew has an appetite like I have never seen. He will happily eat a whole chicken and half a loaf of bread at a sitting. Are you sure he isn't genuinely hungry?

VimFuego101 · 23/10/2015 16:59

I'm not sure a baked potato is enough to sustain a boy going through a growth spurt to be honest. I would challenge him to do a meal plan on your budget so he can see how expensive everything is, but I would also look at what cheap snacks you can give him to fill him up. Porridge, pasta, noodles, toast, boiled eggs, etc - and teach him to cook them himself?

Seeline · 23/10/2015 17:04

I agree that at that age, he probably does need more than a baked potato to keep him going. My Ds would see that as a snack before dinner. What else might he have eaten for the rest of the day?

MrsHathaway · 23/10/2015 17:26

Is he a first child (£20) or subsequent (£10)?

Original poster

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 23/10/2015 18:05

He is first. He would get £20.
Baked potato is huge when he choses one. With a whole can of beans. (Own brand, not basics). And a load of cheese.

He is always 'nice hungry'. Won't eat strawberries too often.
Always wants to eat cheese and pasta. With more cheese and pasta. Followed by bread. With cheese...

Yes, he will be supervised. He can cook loads of things.

OP posts:

Marilynsbigsister · 23/10/2015 18:54

Good for you OP. My dd1 has known how to budget. Since yr 7. Now in first yr of uni and her halls (group of 12) are in awe of her. Within a week she had got everyone into communal meals, they think she is a white witch because they are spending so little on food , to what they expected. (One mum even sent her a bouquet and asked her to pass her wisdom to her dd) you are teaching a really valuable life lesson.

Gottagetmoving · 23/10/2015 19:00

Yes,...let him do it. It is true though, that at some point many teenage lads have a huge appetite, my DS are ridiculous amounts but was skinny and played lots of sports.
I never took any notice of the 'I want'' demands though. He just got whatever I was making.

missymayhemsmum · 23/10/2015 19:10

Yanbu. But stock up on bread, jam, fruit and milk.

Unreasonablebetty · 23/10/2015 19:23

Sorry if I'm missing the point, but if he loves pasta, bread and cheese I don't see the problem?
Bulk bags of pasta cost around £3 and would keep him going forever!
And you can get huge slabs of cheese quite cheaply...
It sounds like he's hungry, and just wants to eat what food he likes? It's him being a teenager, he might learn quite a bit from doing the budgeting for meals with you. Take him shopping and point out how far the money you get for him goes.but I think you will need to look into making sure he feels full, as a jacket potato might not be filling him enough.

mysteryfairy · 23/10/2015 19:33

I think you are being a tiny bit unreasonable.

Great to teach him to budget but you also have to accept that teenage boys develop huge appetites and he isn't being greedy or unreasonable - it's just biology. My DSs are 19 and 18 and I despaired of keeping up with what they ate. But as other posters have said you do have to work at what you can buy to fill him on your budget and make sure it's available to him and not too complicated.

It's inevitable that you either need to spend more or somehow buy cheaper if your budget is totally inflexible as he now needs a lot more calories per day than a small child.

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