To think this should have been discussed with me.

[TastingTheRainbow]

Quick question. This has pissed me off and I'm not sure if it's me being a control freak or if it's genuinely unreasonable.

I've just found out that my partner has given a key to our house to her best friend as well as her mum ( her sister already has one and has for a long time). Now it's not the fact that she's given a key to these people, (although I do worry that so many people having a key leads to a greater risk of someone losing one etc) but I think it's something that should have been discussed with me first to make sure I was ok with it before handing out keys to my house to people.

So AIBU?

YANBU

For what reason has she given them the key?

No. Why on earth would they all need keys?

What reason does she give for handing out so many keys? Bizarre!

Depends if they're the type to pop in unannounced I suppose. Is give my mum a key without discussing it with dh - but she'd only use it if prearranged.

Maybe she's worried about getting locked out?

YANBU - have you asked her why she has given out the keys and explained how you feel? Time for a change of locks maybe?

Safer to have a spare key in a keysafe and keep changing the code.

You say 'our' house and then 'my' house.
Sooo many people had a key to my house.
It never bothered me.
Sisters, BILs, PIL, parents, neighbours.
Saved me having to break into my own house on many occasions!

Absolutely you should have been asked first.

Yanbu

What would happen if someone lost a key? Is you address written on it?

Is your address written on it

YANBU - I would be fuming if DH gave out a house key to one person let alone giving them out like sweets. Don't these people think it's weird that they have keys to your house? Does she have keys to all of these people's houses??

Yanbu

I wouldnt be bothered by a key given to her mum or sister. We've both given a key to our own parents and tbh that was a given. I can't remember really having a conversation about it, even though it will have been mentioned in passing.

The friend I would take much more issue with. Yes I do think that, in that instance, she really should have talked to you first. Just as much as leaving the key to a parent can be seen as normal, it certainly isn't the case for a friend.

What is her reason for doing so?

I have given a spare key to two of my friends as well as my parents. It never crossed my mind to discuss it with DH in advance. He knows and is fine with it.

I also have keys to four other people's houses in addition to my parents'.

It doesn't seem at all odd to me.