To be dreading Christmas already?

[Toomanycoatstocount]

Do a bit of lurking and now have decided to post (and expect to get bashed for being so Scrooge-like!)
AIBU to be dreading Christmas already?!
I'm a nurse, am due to start a new job soonish so could be working, and I have to go to my in laws who drive me slightly mad and they want to go out for Christmas dinner!
Any requests on dealing with this (or kicks up the bum!) would be great

You will be working so your in laws don't matter

You can always volunteer for work if you're not rota-ed

Yeah, I think i'd just put myself down to work to be honest. In fact, I quite often do this

I think I might (DP will be fine with this- he knows I can only handle his parents in small doses!)
The other thing about is, when we stay at their house, we don't have a bed so have to sleep on the floor... I wonder if I could ask to do nights?!

Volunteer to work. I would if I could (for different reasons).

I hate it also. I would just ignore the whole thing if it was up to me. Every year I look for an excuse for not putting up a tree etc. Unfortunately everyone else in household loves it, well seen they don't have to do the endless shopping, wrapping etc. I cannot stand the commercialism of it all. Believe it or not I'm a committed Christian but we are so far removed from the true message of Christmas, it totally stresses me out

I love Christmas but I've just got my roster and I'm doing a 0700-1900 Christmas day and boxing day then 1800-0600 nights finishing on New Years day morning. I'm getting depressed already as I won't have a chance to see family at all over Christmas.

I'm not even sure if I'd be excited if I was seeing my own family, there's too much drama and putting on a big show!
If I had my way, it would just be me and DP.
Maybe next year... Except both sets of parents would kill us!

Ouch NCIS that's no fun at all!
Did you work last year?!
Hopefully your family can arrange something special for you the weekend before!

I'm opting out too brokenhearted55a. Everyone has either died or left. Am gonna block it out and pretend its not happening! (Fingers in ears - la la la)

I love Christmas day because me and DS spend all day in our pjs playing with new presents, watching loads of TV and scoffing treats. My mum normally comes over and joins in. DS hates roast dinner and always asks for his favourite pasta dish which also happens to be my mum's favourite. So I'm not in the kitchen for hours either.

Any invites on Christmas day and I just say "no sorry, we have a tradition of staying at home and relaxing."

Life's too short OP. Do whatever you want.

You don't 'have' to do anything, let alone spend it with people you don't want to, sleeping on a floor. Bigger how 'mad' other people will get. You're adults. Start doing your own Christmas. Don't mean to sound harsh, honestly, but its true. I genuinely don't understand why people don't spend their time as they want, especially when they've settled into their own family life.

Broken-hearted I would love to go away somewhere. DP is the only child though and my mother makes a massive show of Christmas every year. (We've been alternating Christmases for the past five years!) So I'm not sure which year we'd get to go!!

I'm not exactly dreading it, but I am unsettled about it. The past 18 months have been full of not so good events that have set things rather topsy turvy. Some things have settled, some haven't, some never will. I'd rather just skip Christmas but unfortunately I AM Christmas as far as the family goes. I made a few changes that lessened the load last year and will make a few more this year. I'll end up having a lovely time, I know. It's just getting there, iyswim.

Luckily it's not drunken uncles, narc mothers, or terrible in-laws so I really shouldn't complain. It's just some of 'those things that happen' in all our lives, things to do with aging family members, adult children pursuing paths we'd prefer they didn't, the usual crap.

If nights are not an option, I shall suck it up!
Thanks MNetters

I hope things straighten out for you acrossthepond

Thanks tigger - unfortunately I have a lot of responsibility to my family, I can't just not do something because I don't fancy it!

Oh thanks Toomany, I'm sure they either will or I'll find some sugar and make that fucking lemonade (and add gin). You know, I'd never really put the words down before. Just doing that has helped me to realize that I don't have it quite so bad and that I do have options. And that I need to yield some control to others who have offered to help! So I thank you for that, too.

YANBU. I'm dreading it too, and opting out. My Mother has not taken this well but has forgotten that it will be my stillborn son's birthday and frankly, I don't give a shit.

Hopefully I'll have a newborn by then but she won't know if we celebrate it or not this year. I'll take part in it again in a few years when she's older.

I bloody hate it. A huge a amount of work falls entirely on my shoulders just for one bloody day. I can't describe the relief I feel come christmas evening when it's nearly all over.

I'm not that bothered either, we have, BiL, SIL and their two children staying at ours + my mum as we're hosting. PIL, SIL and her boyfriend will be coming also and I will also have a newborn and a toddler. I quite like my in laws but it's going to be like a farm yard here and probably be more stress than it's worth. The only two things I am looking forward too is the food and seeing DS open his presents as this is the first year he fully understands the concept.

I am more of a new year person, except I don't think I will be staying up until all hours on the lash with two small children.

Am counting down until Xmas 2016 as we're in NZ sunning ourselves on a deck with a BBQ, not putting on the Christmas jumpers.

Christmas is a pain, in my opinion.

I am now able to ignore, ignore, ignore until a few weeks prior.

DC are teens so they just get ££, adults get nothing now and i am hoping ot get out of hosting this year too.

I wouldn't mind having a job which meant i could bow out gracefully and leave them all to it.

I have a lot of responsibility to my family, I can't just not do something because I don't fancy it!

Noooooo - this is the story of my life! Don't fall into this trap (yet) OP, especially while you're young (are you young?) and don't have DCs of your own (?) and the rest of your family still have one another. You CAN do your own thing for xmas if you want to. There's years and years of being responsible ahead of you - like when members of the family get old and are alone, and when you've got family wanting to see the DCs. It doesn't sound like that's the case here yet.

If any of my older DDs felt they couldn't do their own thing for xmas i'd be upset. I make a big thing of xmas because everyone seems to love it and strive to come here. If deep down they'd rather stay in bed with their DPs or drive off to a cozy hotel then i'd want them to feel they could say so! I'd miss them, of course, but apart from that i'd only be envious