To be really irritated by this woman's attitude and want to make a complaint?

[Timeforanamechangey]

There is a young guy on my uni course, 'X', with aspergers. Everyone on the course (fairly small classes) and all the tutors know about this.

There are a few women who have not been particularly nice about it and keeps making comments but there is one woman in particular, '?', who is really getting on my nerves with her attitude.

For example, X kept sneezing loudly during the class. Pretty obviously not doing it on purpose to annoy her but Y was getting really irritated and kept making comments about how annoying he was being any how pisse off she was getting. She was sitting about 2 feet from him at the time, he has aspergers he's not deaf!

She loudly comments that she prefers it when he isn't there and makes little snarky remarks about him all the time.

I'm really quite angry about it and feel like I should say something to the course tutor to ask them to have a word with her about it.

I know it's probably passive aggressive of me but I hate confrontations and I have to be on the course with her for the next few years and I cba with dealing with her bitching if I say anything. Everyone has noticed her saying things so it wouldnt be obvious it was me.

Aibu to consider doing this? I am possibly being oversensitive as my ds has autism and I can't bear the thought of people treating him like this. X doesn't seem to have noticed or care very much but tbh that isn't the point to me. She is behaving like a bully and she wouldn't dare be that openly hostile to someone NT. Aibu?

Your opinion that behaving like a dick is suggestive of high functioning autism is wrong and extremely offensive Scremer.

Just to update, I did make a complaint. I went and had a word with the course tutor who actually said she had noticed this behaviour herself in a few people and that she would look into it.

I was in the room earlier having a conversation with another tutor when 2 of the women on my course (close friends of Y) went into a big monologue about how annoying X is being, how disruptive to the class and disturbing their learning, how they are fed up with having to 'tell him off' in lessons Etc. They were asking the tutor to write a letter to some higher up person at the uni to basically tell them to 'deal with' X, one of them even threatened not to come in anymore!

When they left I told the tutor that actually, a lot of what they said was massively exagerrated and that they were making a massive issue out of everything he said or did and I felt it was tantamount to bullying. I mean, you can't just refuse to come in to class because you find one of the other students annoying or I would never go in and threaten not to attend unless the other person is removed!

They were also demanding that X have a 1:1, apparently X has been offered one but has refused and it is down to him and his parents if he wants one, which he doesn't. They were very unhappy about this and essentially wanted the tutor to write to his parents to force them to supply X with a 1:1. I mean, really? These people just have no idea do they?

One of them even commented 'oh X's mum should come and spend the day in the classroom with us and she how she likes it'. REALLY!!!! Did you actually just say that! Because obviously him sitting in a classroom 2 days a week and clicking his pen a bit too often or sneezing a bit too loudly is OBVIOUSLY sooooo much worse than having to look after him all day every day, dealing with any and all sensory issues and all the other stuff he and his parents have to deal with. Are some people really that deluded! I was beyond furious. Do they have any idea just how difficult it can be as a person on the autistic spectrum just to live and interact with other people, like everyone else does. The poor boy just wants to learn, exactly like them, he doesn't deserve this.

I don't know very much about autism or Asperger's, but I have a somewhat large experience of bullies.
Fair play to you OP, sticking up for this young man.

If he irritates her so much, why is she sitting 2ft next to him?

Speak up. You're an adult - you don't need to run to authority to do your telling off for you. Call her on her unpleasant behaviour. I'm sure everyone else in the class thinks she's being unpleasant too.

Oh - teach me not to rtft

Thanks for the update, OP.
Good for you for doing something about this.

Thanks, it just really aggravates me how they are so unwilling to try and see things from his side. I know that not everyone has a good understanding of asd but I feel like even if they did they would act the same way.