To feel my DDs good behaviour has been taken advantage of by a teacher

[Three4two]

DD is upset. She is in yr 4. The school has a Green Amber Red behaviour policy. Every Friday just before home time those who have been Green all week get rewarded with 30 mins playtime.
Today at the beginning of green time the teacher (not her usual teacher) asked DD to tidy up the classroom instead and told her she would get a reward. She spent the half hour tidying but he never came back to the classroom as the usual teacher returned to let them out at home time. Needless to say she got no reward and wasted her green time. I hear from one of my other DDs he has done this before and always chooses the reliable ones to do the tidying. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt that he just forgot the reward but he shouldn't have asked her to do this during green time in the first place. I'm quite angry. DD is always on green and I don't think she should be 'rewarded' by tidying up.

Can you send a message saying he has forgotten the reward and please could he remedy it as it would be a shame to let a child down?

At that age I would have thought I had had a treat, the teacher is showing they trust you and you feel proud of that. Tidying up during lunch time was definitely considered to be a privilege at primary when I was there.

No she shouldn't. Surely the whole class should be helping to tidy, not just one child doing it all

How times have changed!

Being 'trusted' to tidy up or take the register to the office, was like being given a Pride of Britain award when I was a kid

If your DD doesn't like it, then I would have a word I suppose.

The point is all the other kids were outside having fun as it was designated reward time. Maybe I'm wrong but not sure how tidying up constitutes a reward. If it was I'm sure our kids would all be a lot tidier at home.

I'm firmly on your side! Have a word, it is not ok to have a good girl (!) tidy up after everyone else. A whole lot of questionable things going on there.

Of all of the petty grievances about schools and teachers on mumsnet this one has to take the .

I am totally with troublewithangels, this is a total non-issue and you'll just be seen as one of "those" parents if you complain to the school about this.
My DD1 is also in year 4 and would have felt very pleased to have been tasked with this, she definitely wouldn't complain that she didn't get a prize for it

Sometime you just have to suck up these things.It is part of life.

Enjoy the eye roll when you bring this up on Monday

I struggle to believe that any child ever thinks it's a privilege to tidy up when they could otherwise be playing with their friends. I suspect that people viewing their own pasts with rose-coloured spectacles are thinking of occasions when they've were asked to tidy up as an alternative to something they didn't want to do. I was certainly delighted to do so when it got me out of playing netball in the rain.

It seems to me that when a teacher promises something they need to deliver, otherwise what sort of lessons are they teaching the children? And if being asked to deliver on their promises causes eye rolling, they're in the wrong profession.

Complete non issue unless your DD came home in floods of tears for missing the extra break time.

At that age I would have loved being trusted to tidy up the classroom and my DS would also see that as a treat. It's a shame he forgot the reward and you could follow up about that but anything else and you will be 'that' parent IMO.

The teacher shouldn't have offered a reward though, you don't do this to kids or to anyone. It's a sure way to lose respect and trust.

There was nothing wrong with him asking her to tidy up, he obviously finds her responsible enough.

Maybe the teacher who has done this before goes out of the classroom he is abducted by Aliens and is brain washed to forget all about rewards.

He may just think "Thank God for that" "I'm shattered" and forget.
He may go straight onto something else and remember his promise hours later.

Just have a kind word with him and ask him to either stop promising rewards, or remember he's done it.

Ds3 was telling me about staying in for a few minutes to tidy up the other lunchtime. He seemed quite pleased to have been chosen. Apparently the teacher chooses different kids each time.

I barely registered tbh. Am I a bad parent?

If it's the first time, id just tell dd not to worry about it, she was very helpful to the teacher etc.

If it happened on a regular basis I would say something as it isn't fair for her to be tidying whilst everyone else is outside having fun.

What a bonkers policy (the green amber red thingy). Wjat about those kids who get red on Monday (or Amber) and that it, no Green Time on Friday. Whats to motivate them to be Green the rest of the week?

Honestly though OP unless it is frequently ypur dd getting this then it is just not an issue.

You are 'angry' about this....

Oh dear

YANBU. If a reward is promised then it should be given. Teachers should be setting an example of consistency and doing what they say they will.

I'm not against DD being asked to tidy up. I agree with kids being asked to tidy the classroom. I just don't agree with her being asked while everyone else is getting rewarded. There is a big behaviour issue in the school and green time is a major thing for those who have behaved. The teachers talk about it all week to encourage good behaviour.
Quite honestly I couldn't care less if the teachers all find me annoying as my responsibility is to DD, not them.
Hiccup girl, yes she was in floods of tears.

DS would be gutted if he was asked to tidy up rather than play outside with his pals. He would be doubly gutted if the promised reward was then not forthcoming.

Hopefully he would tell the teacher to bugger off politely decline the tidying next time it was offered.

Pick your battles OP

Tell her not to be so dramatic and to ask the teacher on Monday.

Floods of tears over nothing!