Facebook and birth announcements

[GrinAndTonic]

My DB and SIL were having DC2 today via planned c-section.

I heard nothing all morning and assumed it was moved to the afternoon.
At 3pm today a friend messaged me to say congratulations on the birth of my nephew. Yep, I found out that my nephew was born at 8:30am and the news was posted on FB first. I found out from someone I wasn't related to.

My DM had been up to the hospital and seen everyone and also posted on FB but didn't even call me.

I have received a message from SIL asking when I am visiting as she wants the gift I have bought (a sling - DM told her what it was).

I feel so disappointed in the manner that I found out. I understand that this is a special and difficult time (due to the cesarean) but how hard is it for DB to text? If you can Facebook you can text/call.

So AIBU?

[slithytove]

Of course, the first time, we had to tell people that dd hadn't survived birth.

So that took priority. How fortunate you haven't heard that, and that your brother has had a healthy son. (More important than him being your nephew incidentally).

You come across as very me me me.

[ballerinabelle]

My bil and sil waited 14 hours after the birth of their baby to tell anyone and she had been for 36 hours before that. Didn't hear a thing for over two days. Both sets of parents were beside themselves with worry. The least BIL could've done was send a text at some point but you see OP people are strange. Don't worry about it. I certainly wouldn't be rushing to give them a present though.

[jorahmormont]

All of our friends, and most extended family, found out through FB.

We called close family - my dad and siblings (my mum was second birth partner), OH's parents, OH's sister and my nan - immediately after the birth (bearing in mind she was born just before midnight, so it was about 1am by the time we were making the phone calls.

Everyone else found out the next morning when we updated Facebook. If people complained about how they found out, I couldn't care less. I'd done a drip induction on gas and air, been stitched for two hours and was still on constant watch for a blood transfusion because I was so anaemic, and OH was exhausted having not slept for a week. If anyone had called us selfish - or drama queen, spoilt, whatever - I'd have told them not to be so bloody entitled.

[Mmmmcake123]

My dh rang parents, my mum first and told her to tell my dsis which she did. I then group texted friends shortly after. My dsis loves fb but didn't post anything, we hadn't discussed it she just knew better. In op's case I think DM should have let her know but if she was at the hospital already probably just got swept up in the moment. I think sil posting on fb is similar to my group text, she could have thought you already knew or was maybe just so excited forgot about you not having access whilst at work. Think your DM should have remembered this if she had been forewarned by you.

[pinotblush]

Im also thinking that it sounds as if you don't have the best of relationships with your sister-in-law and of course your brother knows this, so Im not really surprised

[Mmmmcake123]

Don't feel hurt tho, it's not worth and as for asking for the sling, I just think she is being a bit giddy rather than blatantly out of order.
Gobby, that was just too abrupt and not very northern

[ElizabethG81]

I think it's really rude actually. I wouldn't say anything, but I'd think this was pretty classless. You make sure family and close friends know first, then put it on Facebook if you really must.

[PaulAnkaTheDog]

slithy

[Orangeisthenewbanana]

We called both sets of parents and my sister within 1-2 hours of DD being born and sent BIL a text at the same time (they had a 3 month old, so couldn't really call them in case we disturbed baby too!). The next day we sent texts to close friends/family (DD born at midnight) and announced on FB later on that day. We felt it was important that closer family/friends knew before the wider world of FB acquaintances, but each to their own. I don't blame you for being a little annoyed, especially when their first contact is to demand a gift from you.

Of course it's possible they thought your DM would just tell you?

[TurquoiseDress]

When my LO was born last year, after my OH had gone home I texted all my close friends with a couple of photos. OH did the same.

I put one photo up on FB with name & details at least about 3 days later.

Really wouldn't have wanted to do that in the first few hours after the birth, I preferred to undivifually contact my siblings & close friends.

I'm someone who is slightly addicted to FB, but when it came to the birth of my baby I didn't want to make it the first place for an announcement.

Also my auntie accidentally told all of my FB by basically announcing the birth, name etc. I actually just deleted her post a few hours later but already had messages coming in.