To expect him to do more about his snoring?

[Hansolosyoyo]

We live in a tiny house that I believe to be made of rice paper. My partner snores. If he goes to bed first I can hear him snoring from our living room & I get THE FEAR #dundundun. It makes me dread going to bed. I wear earplugs despite an allergy to latex and silicone (what luck, eh?) to try to dampen the sound but I still hear it & even worse I can feel it vibrating through our mattress. There isn't enough space for me to sleep elsewhere or to have single beds (even if we could afford them). He does have some physical anomaly that causes him to snore but he refuses to wear the specially made mouth guard the doctors gave him as it hurts him & freaks him out. I'm made to feel like a nag for raising the issue with him & he makes such a fuss if I try to turn him into his side where at least the snoring doesn't cause the bed to vibrate. In reality I'm lying here in such a rage from yet another night of lack of sleep that my pacifist beliefs can get to France! I know he can't help it but am I being unreasonable to expect him to try to do something about it when dr's have already tried to help & he refuses it? The only good night'some sleep I've had in 8 years are when he's on night shift and that isn't often. I'm demented here :,(

Would one of these help?

www.amazon.co.uk/Snore-No-More-Boxing-Glove/dp/B00964191U

I have ear plugs, topped with noise cancelling headphones that are then plugged into a white noise app on my phone.
It works! DH and I can now share a room when we go away! Takes a while to get used to sleeping in headphones but it does mean you get some sleep.

DH snores something awful and it makes no difference what position he is in. We have slept in separate rooms for 3 years but will have to start sharing again in a few weeks as we need to swap bedrooms around as DD2 is almost too big for her crib. There isn't room for both of them in DD1's room so DD1 will be sleeping in DH's room. I have told him to lose weight but he says that his weight is on his stomach, not his neck so it will make no difference and reckons that nobody would see a GP about snoring as there is nothing that can be done.

My husband has a specially made mandible repositioner. A mouth guard. It is the most amazing thing in the world. When he first got it, it hurt his jaw so he called the dentist who made it - if your OH has the same it can be adjusted so that's it's less severe. We did that, it was a little less effective but was a compromise. We recently sent it away to have the anti snoring power increased and my husband missed it! He finally realised that his snoring was affecting his sleep to. As an added bonus the mouth guard also helps stop his teeth grinding, his teeth banging, his moaning and his puff, puff, puffing. It's saved out sleep - insist your OH wears his special mask and does the special exercises (guardian article). Good luck!

I'm not alone!!!! I've been with my current partner 7 years.. he snores VERY loudly!! He always sleeps on his back which makes it worse, but once he's there he won't budge. I kick him, hit him, hold his nose, smothered him with a pillow all sorts lol he just gets angry rolls on his side for all of 5 seconds then slumps back to his back. If he lies on his front he snores as well. He hits ypu in your sleep too, talks/shouts, jumps, kicks, stops breathing.. and no these aren't cos of me lol! Thing is if I tell him I had a shit night sleep he gets really angry and pissy, he gets really angry if he finds me on the sofa and I feel guilty for leaving the bed. He's got this wierd thing where I have to be in bed with him for him to fall asleep and when I'm not there he gets funny so when he wakes up and I'm asleep on the sofa he hates it. I've made jokes about sleeping in separate rooms (jokes.. well truthful jokes!) And he gets really annoyed and says he never wants to be one of those couples who sleep in separate rooms.... but will he go to the doctors n sort it out??? No. Thing is he's always tired as well as me? He can't wake up in the morning either. And if my son is sick in the night or cry it wakes me up literally nothing wakes him up.. we have a baby due in Dec and I honestly worry that his snoring will keep the baby awake or he won't ever wake up to help me out. We have tried some stuff a mouth wash which he tried once and didn't like so never used again.. tried the nose strip but it didn't work.. we got the gum shield and it worked but after 2 nights he refused to wear it. Now apprently its my problem cos he can't hear himself snoring it's me who can't sleep so it's my problem... but if it was the other way round...

My DP is a snorer too.

He snores on his back, his side, when he's sitting up ...hell, he'd probably snore if you hung him upside down by his feet!

It's not a weight issue but is possibly sinus related. He's just been referred to a ENT specialist so I'm crossing my fingers that they'll be a solution of some sort.

A tip for getting them to shut up without moving yourself is to make a clicking sound with your tongue against the roof of your mouth (difficult to explain but the sort of noise you would make to attract a horse's attention IYSWIM). It might only be short-lived respite but at least it takes minimal effort.

All you women feeling guilty because your OHs are keeping you from sleeping!! You're mad!! Who the feck do these men think they are, feeling entitled to put you through torture night after night, THEM getting pissy with YOU for objecting to broken, inadequate sleep. And as for the ones who won't even make an effort - fuck 'em!

Sheesh. You all need to stand up for yourselves. Tell them to sleep on the couch unless and until they can sleep cooperatively with someone else.

What Sushi said: torture because sleep deprivation is a method of torture.

My husband is a snorer and we now sleep in separate beds. Always. Well except when we have visitors and have to give up the spare room. My mum is always commenting that this is no way to have a marriage and I say it wouldn't be a marriage if I had to sleep with him. I kick him, push him, thump him yet within seconds he's snoring again. And he can be in any position not just on his back. I'm convinced it's a weight thing, he didn't snore when we first met!

My DH snores. He used to do a lot to mitigate it, but when we moved into a house with a spare room he started sleeping in there. At first just every now and then when we were both exhausted, but now it's all the time unless we have visitors. I suggested he go back to the doctor, but he hasn't. We both sleep much better in separate rooms, but our marriage seems to be on the rocks. I think the lack of intimacy at night is a huge part of it, but his lack of concern about trying to fix it makes me incredibly resentful too.

WTF is up with these partners who get pissy if you leave the bed when they are blissfully asleep and snoring like a warthog?

Fucking hell.

Last night my partner was a bit snore-y but mostly had restless legs and I was in one of those mega light sleep type nights. So about halfway through the night I got up and slept elsewhere. Got woken up first thing by a hug and a 'sorry I kept you awake didn't I?'. Got back into bed with him for a bit and that was that.

I'm just gobsmacked that people can be so selfish that they are not only more than happy to torture their partners with sleep deprivation (and it is torturous) but also get angry that their partners go to sleep elsewhere and try at least to get some sort of decent nights rest.

I am not sure why this has wound me up so strongly tonight. It just feels as though there is this undercurrent of acceptance at what is frankly cruel behaviour. I could not put my loved one through that sort of sleep deprivation night after night and not give a shit, or have the cheek to get mad at them for waking me / sleeping elsewhere.