About computer games before school

[BondGate]

DS1 (4 yrs) started school this September and has been having a hard time settling in. Yesterday, his teacher gave me a glowing report about him at pick-up, which we were very pleased about.

This morning, while I was in the shower, DS1 asked DH if he could play the monster game (an online computer game that's supposed to help children learn to read). DH said yes, and I've got out of the shower to find DS1 engrossed in this.

I'm not happy. Since school started, I've introduced a policy of no TV or games on the tablet in the mornings before school, because if we let DC do these, it just slows everything down and makes it a lot harder to get to school on time. DH is aware of this and had said he was fine with this.

But apparently the monster game is an exception because (a) DS1 was really good at school yesterday so should have things he asks for and (b) I didn't specifically say DC weren't to play on the desktop computer before school.

DH isn't taking DS1 to school this morning BTW, so it's not really going to impact DH if this messes up our morning routine.

AIBU?

You posted this at 7am. Unless you have an hour commute to school I really can't see why playing on the computer to while away half an hour at this time of the morning would be any problem. I don't care really. So long as they're washed, dressed and breakfasted they can do what the heck else they want before school.

How do you know they don't got to breakfast club first?

Nope, all banned in my house. I did allow them to play on their phones before school (12 & 8) but DD started getting lippy and not putting her phone down when we are supposed to be out the door (at 6:45)
So I've put a ban on them.

I wouldn't make a huge hoo haa over it, just remind hubby and say well in that case afterschool extra is fine but not in the am it makes things too difficult and as you do the am organising your rules - if he thinks otherwise then he needs to sort the morning routine.

Having said that my DD was on the ipad at 1/4 to 7 this am as her friend facetimed her. I was furious - I have set rules around this ie not before 1/4 to 8 at the earliest and that if at any point I say turn it off it goes off. I lost the plot!!! So we don't always all get it right

Morning screen time banned here as I noticed makes my DD v uncooperative and ratty. Just my experience but the effect was marked.

What did kids do before 'screen time'?

I've just returned from holiday and the amount of times we ate out and saw kids sat in the restaurants with tablets and phones. Surely there's ways to entertain kids at home and out without a bloody screen - my parents managed it ok!

There are ways to entertain children without tablets, but sadly most of it involves actually having to speak to your child- which is why some of us prefer to avoid it ;-)

I've suffered through too many games of Eye Fucking Spy than I care to remember.

Unlimited screen time here. All the problems getting ds out of the door have been unconnected with screens.

- I thought I was quite lenient but my dcs (8 &10) are allowed no screen time during the school week (maybe a little bit of TV occasionally). Weekend they are allowed 1 hour Saturday and 1 hour Sunday (which they only get as reward for good behaviour) holidays they are allowed 30 mins per day (only as reward for good behaviour). THey are not as interested in TV so I am a bit more flexible with it during weekends and holiday. Screen time before school????? It hadn't even crossed my mind!

My two are allowed to watch TV when they are completely ready for school - I think that's been the case since Reception. They are now in Y6, and can be trusted to get themselves up, breakfasted and to school, on time, totally unsupervised, and including half an hour or so of TV. My work here is done.

That said, OP, YANBU, because it's a policy, agreed on by you both, and your husband has buggered around with it. Never OK.

Sleep time is very precious in our house as we usually get home pretty late at night. We get up with exactly the right amount of time to spare for getting washed, dressed, breakfasted and out of the door. So no, definitely no spare time for screens.

If I had an early bird child I probably wouldn't mind though.

But YANBU anyway, because you and your husband had already agreed no.

We have a no technology rule in the morning. No tv, no computers, no kindle, no ipad etc etc! Ds now 9 has asked again recently but I am sticking to my guns on this one. I may have relented by now if he was one of those kids who is up at 6 but he is rarely up before 7.45 and would still be in his pants at 8.45 when we need to leave as it is without a serious amount of chivying up!

We used to read together over breakfast, still do occassionally, mostly now we chat. If your DH wants to do something with him they could read actual books.

Screen time only in school holidays in our house. Apart from occasionally watching music videos on youtube. This was a consequence of their behaviour deteriorating and complete inability to be able to finish the game and hand over phone/ipad.

TV is usually only on at weekends.

DCs are 10 and 7.

No morning screen time here or tv. We get up with enough time to get ready for school. After school there is no tv or screen time until homework is completed by both DD's. then they can do what they want

ds is regularly up two or even three hours before he needs to leave the house. I am not a morning person. I am really happy that he has screen time in the mornings.

On the other hand we are strict about screen time at night. I expect ds to drop off between 8.30 and 9pm. The only screen time he gets after 6pm is watching the news with us. The rest is reading/talking/playing etc. To be honest, when he gets home from school @ 3.30pm a lot of his time is voluntarily outside playing football.

Horses for courses