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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To still go away for a weekend when I have Shingles?

43 replies

Whereyourtreasureis · 07/10/2015 23:59

I'm hoping for some wise advice if possible.
DH and I have a long-overdue weekend away this weekend. Haven't been away together in almost a year, and knowing our 3 DCs were spending the weekend with their Grandma this week, we booked a concert and 2 nights in a hotel and don't want to miss it. So of fucking course, a week ago I came down with an infection. One side of my face, my stomach and one tit for God sake is still covered in blistery spots. I've finished my course of Acyclovir, and plastered my body in calamine for a week, but I still have the blisters.
But I really don't want to miss going away this weekend, I feel OK in myself, occasional pains and temperature but this is controlled with Codeine and Paracetamol prescribed at the time.
I am just on the fence wondering if it would be irresponsible to surround myself with a lot of people at the weekend? Once I was told by GP it was Shingles, I asked DH to take DCs to school, as I know there's a lot of babies and young children up there that I shouldn't be around until I'm well. Maybe I'm being over-cautious or over-worried. But WitBU to attend an event with spots still remaining from Shingles? Thank you Smile

OP posts:
Whereyourtreasureis · 08/10/2015 00:00

I should add, the event is over18, so no risk of children who haven't had chickenpox yet being there.

OP posts:
fulldutypaid · 08/10/2015 00:13

Why not give your GP a quick call and check if its ok?

Wolfiefan · 08/10/2015 00:16

NHS website seems to suggest someone would have to come into contact with an open blister. Not sure how likely that is. Risk to person changing the sheets?

KatieLatie · 08/10/2015 00:16

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Blueturquoise · 08/10/2015 00:16

I don't know if you re still contagious or not at this stage - why don't you talk to the GP or whomever gave you meds - get a check up and see?
To be honest I wouldn't be concerned about contact with kids who haven't had CP as much I would about immune compromised people such as someone on or getting over chemo or with a severe illness.
My friend had cancer, long term, and was often on low dose chemo to buy her some extra time, several times she was really ill, due to someone s inconsideration in a circumstance like this (exactly like this actually - she caught shingles from someone who thought they were healed up).
Anyway there are those who really are battling to partake in life for the sake of their kids and someone inadvertently exposing them can really set them back.
I know you wouldn't do it deliberately but it does happen ......

SingingSamosa · 08/10/2015 00:24

I think that if you are still contagious (which I suspect you are) then you are severely risking the health of other people. Catching chicken pox in early pregnancy is really dangerous for the baby (and there are plenty of people who didn't get the pox as children). As others have said - immune-suppressed people are fairly common too. It's not just people with cancer, it's all those with auto-immune diseases such as Crohn's, diabetes, lupus, RA etc, who take immune suppressants to control their illness. There are many of them about (I'm one!). Catching chickenpox from you would be very bad for them. The maid who is changing your bedding at the hotel, the waiting staff in the restaurants, the people who use the toilets at the concert after you...etc etc.
Your weekend away can happen another time, risking putting someone in hospital/having a miscarriage is, in my opinion, being very selfish.

gamerchick · 08/10/2015 00:30

You can't catch shingles blue chickenpox yes but not shingles.

It's a tough one OP, you know you can pass on chickenpox so it's up to you whether you should take the risk. I don't know what I would do if my turn comes.

Whereyourtreasureis · 08/10/2015 00:36

I've tried getting back in to GP, and also for a telephone appointment, they cannot see me until the 20th. It is stupidly busy here.

We cancelled a visit this week to a relative of DH's who has just had her baby (obviously!), and have taken precautions with keeping my distance from my elderly GP's since i knew what it was.

All the blisters i have are covered over. They are still lumps, and a few are painful underneath. They aren't weepy, just very visible. It was last Monday eve I began anti-virals, so by Saturday, it will have been 13 days.

OP posts:
JassyRadlett · 08/10/2015 00:45

I should add, the event is over18, so no risk of children who haven't had chickenpox yet being there.

My grandmother gave me chicken pox via her shingles when I was 21. It was horrific.

missingmumxox · 08/10/2015 00:54

sorry I got chicken pox at 23 from a patient with Shingles, but on the plus side you say you have had antivirals, and you can cover the areas with with shingles as it can be covered, if you can then you are good to go, just dispose of dressings really well, so you don't expose others to them, that is the important bit.

the antivirals are the icing on the cake, but if their are pregnant/immunosupressed people I would just avoid :)

NewBallsPlease00 · 08/10/2015 01:02

Please don't, at 39 weeks pg I'm so nervous of going out as I've twice seen spotty kids or adults clearly not scabbed
It's annoying, I have dc, I get need for time off, but it's also hugely selfish

kali110 · 08/10/2015 01:41

I think it would be unfair. I have health problems and a low immune system and i catch everything going.
It's quite dangerous for me with the medication i am on if i am sick or diarrhoea as the meds aren't in my system so there are bad consquences.I'm also in severe pain everyday anyway.
Theres also people going through chemo who don't need to get it.
I don't leave the
House a lot as it is, but once a week i do need food or go to docs/hospital trips.
I hope you feel better soon though, it sounds nasty.
Can you try hydrocortisone cream on the lumps to help with the itching?

queenofthebored · 08/10/2015 03:28

If you are still at the infectious stage you would be VVVVVU I have a severely weakened immune system and if I caught chickenpox then it would not be a missed weekend of fun for me it would be an extended hospital stay and likely every complication going . If you cant speak to your doctor contact NHS Direct for advice if they tell you that your still infectious then you should keep away from the event.

Senpai · 08/10/2015 03:44

Here's my thoughts on it.

There's two ends of responsibility for not getting sick:

The immune compromised (for whatever reason) need to carry hand sanitizer to kill any germs their hands come in contact with. Or, to make sure if their severely compromised to avoid places with large crowds.

The people who know they are sick need to take reasonable precautions to keep germs from spreading by washing hands and carrying hand sanitzer. In your case to make sure that you aren't contagious and not touch your blisters while there.

It should be alright since there's all adults who have an incredibly high probability of already having the pox and are therefore immune. But I would check just to be sure.

Doraydiego · 08/10/2015 04:10

Newballs, have you not had chickenpox yourself?

queenofthebored · 08/10/2015 04:50

Senpai its impossible to live a life avoiding large crowds when you have a severely compromised immune system and will do for the rest of your life life , I take all reasonable precautions and accept that I may be accidentally infected by someone who may not be aware they are ill - but imho going out to a large gathering when you know you are infectious is pretty shabby behaviour to everyone not just people with my issues

Spartans · 08/10/2015 05:48

Personally I wouldn't. I know it's really disappointing, but it's not just kids you have to worry about when it comes to chicken pox.

Senpai · 08/10/2015 06:08

queenofthebored If you read my post you'd have seen that I said it goes both ways. I also told her to just check and make sure. Wink

But, it's equally impossible for sick people to stay inside. I had an extremely contagious virus that spreading like wild fire where I live. It was horrible, I felt like I was dying. I still had to go to the doctor and the grocery store to pick up anti-nausea prescriptions, electrolytes, and bland foods. I'm sure I spread my sickness to unsuspecting people. But I had no choice but to venture out, and frankly I'd have been happier staying home if I could.

I also have an awkward problem of carrying viruses without them actually affecting me. So I'll go to a friend who's sick and spread their bug without knowing I'm carrying. I do try to do my part by getting the flu shot though so I don't spread that at least.

That's why I said it goes both ways. It's impossible for both to go to either extreme and stay recluse. But if I knew a bug could land me in the hospital and had the options of attending a hotel party indoors where it's easiest to catch airborne illnesses I might opt out and go to a beach party instead. If you get what I mean.

Mermaidhair · 08/10/2015 06:30

Well it will be ok for you if you still go, but will it be ok for me others?

queenofthebored · 08/10/2015 06:47

Senpai there are indeed many times when people can be ill and can't avoid going out totally appreciate that - sorry if I came across arsey in my previous post! If I was going to a concert I would reasonable expect that I might pick up a cold - I had one episode where a friend gave me whopping cough (long story) but the poor thing had no idea she had it and was so upset about passing it me - but I accept that sort of incident is just part of my life - had she done it on purpose I'd have felt very differently, knowingly going out when its non essential to a crowded public place and being infectious is another matter - in my case it would mean an much extended more severe bout of whatever but if I was a lot older or having chemo for a terminal illness or pregnant then its could be more severe. It would be akin to me when highly contagious with whopping cough going to visit other people to check their immunisations were working rather than the joyful 3 weeks I had to stay away from people enjoy a Netflix binge.

fiorentina · 08/10/2015 07:19

When I has shingles, also on my face it did take a long time for the scar to disappear. I was told that the only way I would be infectious was if someone came into contact with the weeping sore, so if yours are hidden or healed but just still lumpy you would be fine?

Go and have fun.

Dawndonnaagain · 08/10/2015 07:22

senpai whilst it does work both ways, if you are ill and you know it you really should make every effort to stay away from other folk. Yes there may be times when it's unavoidable, but cabin fever, tough, stay home. People forget that it isn't just adults with compromised immune systems.

Mistigri · 08/10/2015 07:33

Shingles is spread by direct contact (it's not airborne) so I think it is a question of whether the concert will bring you into direct physical contact with others.

If it's seated, I think objectively the risk for others is rather low as long as you take the usual precautions. If you're planning to be squashed in a crowd in the front of a standing area, the the risk to others is higher.

Orangeanddemons · 08/10/2015 08:11

I went on holiday with shingles but I asked my doctor first. She said as long as it's scanned over you're not infectious. She also said you'd have to practically lick the shingles to get infected. If they are covered it's not problem.

To be fair I was past the active stage. However I was very weak and tired. So it wasn't the best holiday ever.

CloudsofBrick · 08/10/2015 08:52

I have recurring shingles on my face - currently have a bout starting again now while pregnant - and I carry on as normal. It's more of an issue with DS because he practically sticks himself to me!

As others have said, someone needs to actually suck on those blisters to catch something, so unless you don't physically feel up to it, I'd go and enjoy yourself.

Just be prepared for people staring at your scabby face! Grin