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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

18 yr old dd and rent how much is reasonable ?

24 replies

whatisforteamum · 06/10/2015 20:52

This is her first job and we let her have a month to spend or save as she likes.The month is up.dd earns around 700-800 per month,Dh and i take her to work the 4 miles as buses are unreliable and she finishes at 11pm some eves.we dont earn much and would like her to contribute what is reasonable as she wants to save for a car ?

OP posts:
mrstweefromtweesville · 06/10/2015 20:53

One third of salary in rent. one third in savings.

MrsLeighHalfpenny · 06/10/2015 20:54

DD who is on an apprenticeship and min wage pays us £100 per month. She is able to save and enjoy a good social life

TidyDancer · 06/10/2015 20:55

I think a quarter is more than enough when she's earning so little. But I would ensure a certain amount is also being saved.

expatinscotland · 06/10/2015 20:56

I agree with mrs.

CookieMonsterIsOnADiet · 06/10/2015 20:58

Bar the petrol and her food, your costs would be the same regardless so a little to cover that on the understanding she saves x amount for her own car.

RealityCheque · 06/10/2015 20:59

It's her money and she is an adult. By all means set an amount for rent (I tend to think a third is a good starting point), but its fuck all to do with others (including parents) how much is saved.

Another example of mn busybody madness.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 06/10/2015 21:00

I agree with TidyDancer, a quarter is plenty.

expatinscotland · 06/10/2015 21:01

'your costs would be the same regardless '

Not if they were in receipt of child benefit and child tax credits and those have stopped.

Vixxfacee · 06/10/2015 21:02

I would take £200 a month and save £100 of it for her.

Original poster
whatisforteamum · 06/10/2015 21:13

Thank you so much.i paid 25 on my 100 a week in the 80s however i dont want to fleece her and would like to get her in the habit of contributing.Her birthday money will cover driving lessons but we know she will need to save for a car which will help us too as she will be able to get work further from home :)

OP posts:
MrsGentlyBenevolent · 06/10/2015 21:24

Is it just basic rent you want, or can you break it down e.g. per month, expect £25 towards basic food (not including extras such as alcohol), £25 for gas/electric/water, £10 internet/phone, £20 towards petrol etc (obviously these figures depend on what you actually spend per month on them, and you can figure a decent part she can pay towards). If it's not happening already, I also suggest she pays for her own mobile contract.

As for the savings, I wouldn't make a big point about it - however, I was (am) terrible with money and would have really appreciated having someone 'save' for me (parents equally crap with money though). So either trust her to know how to balance her own money, but refuse to lend cash/buy items for her if she does 'run out' at the end of the month (a quick and harsh lesson to learn), or 'charge' her a bit extra, put it in savings, and when it comes to her being in a position to get a car it will be a nice suprise.

dementedma · 06/10/2015 21:27

Petrol costs and own mobile. She will be paying rent/mortgage the rest of her days so don't charge her any more on the understanding she is saving as much as she can. How much is up to her.

brokenhearted55a · 06/10/2015 21:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Becles · 07/10/2015 07:46

A third as a starting point, then petrol costs. Take this time to go through basic budgeting with her and also the pitfalls you encountered when you first started to manage your own money and home.

I'd suggest that she divide the rest between savings and spending and aldo encourage her to open a savings account with a view to short and long term goals.

m0therofdragons · 07/10/2015 07:53

My parents charged 10 percent as my brother and I earned different amounts so a percentage was fairer.

BlueMoonRising · 07/10/2015 08:03

Increased costs aren't just food and petrol. When my daughter moved out, my council tax and electricity bill went down. I could also have a cheaper telephone/internet package. I can't afford to subsidise an adult.

My DD is now back home and pays £200 pm and earns roughly the same as your daughter.

IKnowIAmButWhatAreYou · 07/10/2015 08:17

Based on what she's earning, around £150. That way she's got enough to see the benefits of working too (night out, shiny stuff).

00100001 · 07/10/2015 08:20

awww, nobody has jumped in yet to say you shouldn't charge your precious baby??

x2boys · 07/10/2015 08:21

i was earning about the same as your daughter when i qualified as a nurse 20+years ago maybe a bit more i paid £`130/month to my parents for board and lodgings they didnt need it but rightly felt i should contribute, the rest of my wage was mine it was the only time in my life i had thousands in the bank!

Penfold007 · 07/10/2015 08:21

What has your daughter suggested? Ask her how much she wants to save and what does she think a reasonable contribution to keep and lifts would be.

MidniteScribbler · 07/10/2015 08:47

I would take a quarter, but keep it in a savings account (and not tell her). It would be a lovely gift to give her when she is in a position to buy her own property.

molyholy · 07/10/2015 09:15

I agree with Vixxfacee

Pengweng · 07/10/2015 09:16

I'd say 25% of her wages (if it includes rent, basic food (she can buy her own extras) and all utilities) and then ask her to put the same into savings for a car. That gives her 50% to spend on herself a month.

aprilanne · 07/10/2015 09:19

probably about 100 pound a month as i say to my sons its not about the money its the principle..

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