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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To refuse to let neighbour destroy our garden?

109 replies

Muddylawn · 06/10/2015 20:52

We live in a terraced house and are currently on the market to sell. We have had an offer accepted on a house we like, and we're waiting for a buyer for our house.

Our next door neighbour (who doesn't live there, but rents out his flat), is undertaking an extension to the rear of his property into his garden. He advised us of the works 2 months ago, and expressed that he would need to bring down our fence. Despite knowing we were going to be selling the house and the timing wasn't ideal, we agreed.

We've now had several viewings, and obviously next door is messy, noisy, and our garden looks awful. Our garden was completely re done really beautifully a couple of years back and is definitely one of the best selling points of the house!

At no point has the neighbour apologised or shown any concern for the disruption he is causing.

Today, he has said he actually needs to re-site his drains as they are currently where his foundations need to go. Because we are in a terraced row of houses, he will need to move our drain, and go all the way through to the other side of our garden to our 2nd drain, to re-route the connecting pipes. Effectively bringing up our entire garden/lawn/new paving/borders.

His email asks us to respond with the 'Ok' promptly as they need to get on with the work.

I am actually really angry. Am I unreasonable to just say a flat out NO to this?

How can we sell our house with the garden all pulled up? And where is the concern or apology for all the disruption they are expecting us to put up with?

OP posts:
StillStayingClassySanDiego · 06/10/2015 20:54

Say no.

honeyroar · 06/10/2015 20:54

Tell him you will only ok it if he pays for a pro landscaper to make good your garden as it is putting buyers off?

PeopleLieActionsDont · 06/10/2015 20:56

Say no. I wouldn't have even let him take down the fence. His desire to extend is not your problem.

StealthPolarBear · 06/10/2015 20:56

Yanbu. I'd be telling him now is not a good time and he'll need to negotiate with the buyers

RealityCheque · 06/10/2015 20:57

Honeyroar is correct. And there must be a very short timescale attached. And all agreed in writing.

howtorebuild · 06/10/2015 20:57

You are partly angry at yourself as much as you are him for giving an inch, now he wants a mile. His monkey his circus and get the fence replaced.

beetrootpickle · 06/10/2015 21:02

Unless there is an easement or similar, he has no automatic right of access across your land to your drain - and I would say no.

It is ridiculous to ask you to dig up your whole garden. YANBU

What would happen if the garden were not re-instated to your satisfaction - very costly - and a dispute that you would have to declare to a potential buyer. No no no !

(I would also ask for the fence to be re-instated with immediate effect, too)

TheMotherOfHellbeasts · 06/10/2015 21:02

I would say no too, and tell him that the fence has to be back up within three days, but I am not usually very reasonable when it comes to people fucking up my property.

Anastasie · 06/10/2015 21:05

Say no, no question about it. What an arse to try and do this to you.

What an utter arse.

In fact tell me where you live and I'll come and say no for you, in person, with a crow bar. Smile

And make him pay to have your garden sorted out, too.

Anastasie · 06/10/2015 21:07

Don't escalate it to a dispute though if you can avoid it. That could fuck up your house sale. Just say to hold fire until you have spoken to your solicitors. Do it in writing so there is no doubt you have said it (email will do).

If anyone employed by him sets foot in your garden, be at them with a spade.

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 06/10/2015 21:07

He should have thought of this and got permission when he was first planning the extension.

expatinscotland · 06/10/2015 21:08

I'd tell him NO. But I'd have told him to sling his hook at the fence in the first place unless he agreed in writing to restore it entirely. He's a pisstaker. Stop allowing him to take the piss.

Anastasie · 06/10/2015 21:09

Also if he didn'tthink about this before he started, at the planning stage, he is a fuckwit with no one to blame but himself. And does he even have planning permission? And what else has he skimped on for this folly?

There's probably all sorts of issues with it.

Anastasie · 06/10/2015 21:09

x posts with the Countess Smile

Floppy5885 · 06/10/2015 21:09

Tell them you need to talk to your solicitor first

Anastasie · 06/10/2015 21:10

Talk to the council btw and if he hasn't got planning they will come and shut down his stupid project for you.

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 06/10/2015 21:10

I'm surprised he has made an offer on your house

Purplepoodle · 06/10/2015 21:14

Wow that is a huge ask. You definitely need legal advice and some form of contract drawn up if this is to go ahead.

EMS23 · 06/10/2015 21:15

In order to resite a drain that serves more than only his own property he would need permission from the water company that covers your area. He should have asked for a site survey during his planning stage and considered this much earlier on.
I have recently had to do just that and lucky for me it turned out to be a private drain serving only my property. I was told my by architect that costs can very wildly if it is a drain which serves more than one property.

Two things stand out to me:

  1. How much is access to your land worth to him and how much is he offering to pay you for that access. He can make the first offer and you can negotiate up from there.
  2. I'd seriously consider giving Building Control at your local councils planning department a call to understand what they think about this drain issue.
threenotfour · 06/10/2015 21:26

I am not sure why you would say yes to be honest. Contacting planning and building control sounds like a good plan too.

AyeAmarok · 06/10/2015 21:28

Absolutely not. No way.

You shouldn't even have let him take down the fence!

SmokingGun · 06/10/2015 21:30

Be very careful with him moving drainage as lateral drains are now homeowners responsibility to maintain after the sewers for adoption scheme. It could cause some serious issues if the work isn't don't correctly that could impact you significantly,

TheCatsMother99 · 06/10/2015 21:31

Don't open up that can of worms, it's not worth it for a neighbour who won't be a neighbour that much longer.

miaowroar · 06/10/2015 21:33

expressed that he would need to bring down our fence

Oh he would, would he? What about asking if he could please have permission to temporarily remove the fence before making it good?

And what about you just saying no!

He doesn't have a right to do all this surely!?

AdoraBell · 06/10/2015 21:35

YY to contacting council re his planning approval/permission and going through your solicitor. Don't agree to anything regardless of what he says he needs.