To sulk at what this young generation thinks is cool

[Snoozebox]

I was cool before they even made it mainstream :(

As a child and teenager I was horribly bullied for being geeky, having different interests to all the others at my school, even for pulling my socks up and wearing glasses...and now all the youngsters are at it, and suddenly it's cool and trendy.

I'm glad bullying may be on the decrease because of this but part of me is also resentful at the fact I was clearly born too early. In the 90s, if you didn't conform then you were ostracised. Now social media and the Internet seem to have made previously more niche fads a lot more popular and acceptable.
I think teenagers who aren't being sheep must be having a much easier time of it these days, or have I got it all backwards?

No none of them has learning difficulties, DD was and is very tolerant of those children and has stepped in to prevent them being bullies, there are 3 in her current class, one boy doesnt understand that the others are taking the piss, he thinks they are friends, she stands up for him all the time, telling the others to back off, shes had a few yell.at her for spoiling their fun. No these girls are just shallow, their parents think they are perfect and wouldnt harm a fly, they dont see the cruel jibes on instagram ... one posted things you would dream off as a year 7 truely shocking, another had her brother corner a girl and threaten to rape her ... she thought it was a joke .. ..

Agh I typed a reply and it seems to have disappeared! (Sorry if this now a duplicate)

Ok I appligise then, it was just because you said TA's galore they're not funded if there's no LDs it's hard enough to get if you do have a child with LDs. And the Social lessons made me think we were talking about ASC!
I do however know the type of child you mean though the type that has been over insulduged and their behaviour condoned by parents who aren't that acceoting of people that are unlike them themselves?! I used to volunteer in a youth centre that worked with teenagers like this, some given a bit of attention and help understanding volemce and fowl language are not helping them really got it, others yes I can say neither the Instagram abuse or the rape thing shock me.

I was a teenager in the 90s...I was definitely born at the wrong time. I have always loved dressing up and glam clothes, hair and make up. Unfortunately the 90s was the era of grunge. I hated all the clothes in the shops. I also hated indie music. The fashion and music nowadays would have suited me much better!

Her high school is brilliant at this type of thing, and really do take it seriously. Not only did i have to rebuild DD - confidence on the floor - v bad junior school - but i also thought they let the bullies down aswell - they had no idea the effect they had on DD, but also how others would see them at high school. They still bicker argue etc ... have found few new friends, because they have no idea how to be friends ... only how to create drama around themselves, be it about boys, or latest must have .. yes over indulged but ungrateful and boastful .. i think you know exactly what i mean!

sally a good high school can make a world of difference, I struggled through primary, (bullies, rubbish teachers undiagnosed Aspergers) I can honestly say I had a brilliant time at high school.
Well that's a good point that school that let the bullying go unchecked/not dealt with let's the bullies down too. I saw many a teenager hate being told their behaviour was bullying or unacceptable because to them it was just the way people spoke to each other. And that's it they then struggle for friends in older teenage life because they really have no idea how to be a friend.

I know what you mean, I was shopping in charity shops before it was cool, now it's chic! I wish being different and 'geeky' had been more appreciated when I was at school. I just tell myself I was ahead of the trends!

I don't understand your post Sally.

Are you mocking the bullies for having LSAs and doing social skills?

Also, you do not know if the 'bullies' are SEN.

Are SEN students, rather.

I know they arent special needs, the bullies got away with the bad behaviour because junior school wouldnt deal with it, DD had been in the class from reception, i knew the mom, had junior school been effective in behaviour management, and had an anti bullying policy that worked, my DD wouldnt have suffered, and these girls would have learnt how to be a good friend, i.e be thoughtful and kind to others. The school let them move up to high school with this behaviour firmly in their minds as acceptable. So very quickly in became apparent that they would mis behave .. punching, arguing, spread rumours, fighting, attitude, etc, they were moved into the lower class to be monitered. The parents were never informed of their behavior towards others
And couldnt wouldnt see it anyway. They let DD down and these girls.
Im pleased that they were moved, because when a child is bullyied, you feel. That maybe you are over reacting maybe your own child is in the wrong, doing something they shouldnt,.,, its a tough path to walk. But high school worked it out. These girls are getting much needed help under watchful eye, and DD is away from them.

I have yet to see any link with SEN children and bullies, other than sEN being bullied, which DD wont stand for.. as I said earlier.

Well to me your post read as if you thought it was funny they had LSAs, and social skills classes.

I know they aren't special needs

They either have, or do not have SEN. Nobody is special needs. That wording is offensive.

Listen up, OP.

Society does not evolve unless young people rebel.

You were a nerdy, presumably quite brainy teenager of the '90s. You felt you were on the outer then, but now your look and attitude are hip, because they are what society needs right now. We need our brainiac geeks more than ever, and they get the respect and pay packets they are due.

Be glad you were ahead of your time. You were the advance guard. Claim your hipster status with confidence.

I'm not sure what is the coolness to come, as my DD is only 7 and it is a bit early to tell. All I can say, based on what goes on at her school, is that doing well at schoolwork, having an outside interest with lessons to develop it, and having friends across the grades and not just in one's own seem to make for a popular kid.

Being a fake geek is hipster, which is "cool", supposedly.

Being an actual geek/nerd is still seen as 'dumb' and a bullyable offence.

Just one example is gaming -

Hipster geeks can maybe name a few Pokemon, and will have a 'totally kitsch' Gameboy Colour with a Zelda game and an original Pokemon game that they play on the train, trying to make sure everyone can see them. Talk to them about Satoshi Tajiri and other devs and they're totally clueless.

Actual geeks tend to have the latest consoles, plus (if they're lucky) a gaming computer set-up and their own streaming channels on Twitch and Youtube etc, and know a lot about the storylines, the devs, the music, the new releases and the old games still worth playing.

YANBU to sulk, but true geek isn't cool. Cool kids pretending to be geeks so they can wear the glasses is 'cool'.

Sorry you found that offensive, I found it offensive that my daughter came home crying every day for a year, offensive that she was sworn at, attacked, had this pinched was excluded. I never knew what would happen as she walked into school.
High school is very inclusive, i find it funny that these girls ruled the roost are now watches like hawks. They were equally failed by junior school and are paying the price.... 12 months too late.
As I said, all my children are well aware of children with SEN, they have a unit with high level SEN and they volunteer to play in the unit ... per school requests. There are plenty of high functioning special needs in their classes. I know they arent children with special needs .. better?

I think that our teens have a whole different set of problems, and I say this as a child of the 80's and someone who didn't fit in.
Social media can easily be used against teens in a way I had no concept of as a child. If I wasn't invited to a cool party, or part of the cool group - it wasn't in my face and all over Facebook in the way it is now. If I fucked up and got drunk or did something stupid, it wasn't all over Twitter/Facebook/Instagram the way it is now.

My children are expected to achieve higher standard in education than was ever expected of me.
If I could choose, I would choose my childhood over theirs for them, A freer and less stressful existence in my opinion.

I am a true gaming geek but I don't look like one. I wear chic & smart clothes and my make up and hair is perfect. I just like to be different even when I'm mixing with my gaming geek friends. Stand out from the crowd and all that

Dd2 is a proper geek she was bullied for it by the kids wearing the ironic clothes they are hipsters not geeks so they are not really individuals like you say,

Dd liked super heros long before primark sold batman tee shirts she had to hide her comic con pictures last year on facebook because some girls in her year called her " a fucking weirdo" for dressing up .

TeamScoutRifle my DH is true gaming geek too...he was bullied mercilessly at school for all manner of terrible afflictions he is mixed race, he used to wear glasses, he was an overweight teenager....but as soon as he saved enough of his pocket money to buy the best new game, all the arsehole kids started sucking arse because they wanted to play it

Aw your poor DD Mrs :( cosplay is awesome! We're going to Comic Con end of November - DP as Captain America, me as Robin from Batman and DD as Mr Staypuft from Ghostbusters! Hope those idiot girls didn't get to her too much :(

She has just been to Glasgow last weeken. she was fine just had a select few to viewher photos she left school this year and deleted a lot of school kids from her Fb she embraces her geek but its a shame kids dont let others be. Enjoy comiccon jorah

Gaming geek here as well played Zelda originally and without irony.
Also bought lots of my clothing from military surplus shops, loved my East German shirt. Did it for practical reasons, this was is the 1980's. Not only did I not fit in at school but my sisters apart from one are exceptionally girly.

Personally I think that affected hipster culture whatever it is is absolute bollocks.

I was thinking about this in the car this morning. DD (8) was playing 'spot the high school student in a coat' with me (we're still at zero and we've been playing for 4 years). She was waxing lyrical about how she will always wear a coat, and what's cool about being cold and I did wonder what will happen when she's a teenager. I was that teenager who wore a coat because I didn't give a flying fuck about fashion and just wanted to be appropriately dressed. I'd like dd to be that teenager, I'd like her to stick two fingers up at what's expected but I don't want her to be bullied for it.

DD has always been a bit different. She follows her own path. Her teachers always comment that she has her own interests and she has fabulous self esteem about it. She shares these interests with her class and atm, it works. I don't know how it will work in a few years time when she's no longer 8 and protected by primary school. The way she dresses, what she reads, her interests, everything about her jars with what other children her age are doing. ATM, her interests make her inordinately happy. I hate to think she'll ever be ashamed of them. I don't even know if it's avoidable. You see it in every group. Even on here there are statements about 'well if you were a true geek you'd have x and know y'. Shared interests build friendships but I well remember the expected conformity if you were to fit in anywhere.

hazey are you me?

I'm a grungy geek.