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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I finally confronted my mil over favouring one gc.

9 replies

Mermaidhair · 02/10/2015 02:49

Hi everyone, I posted many months ago for advice on my mil favouring one of my dc. Quick backstory is that my gorgeous dh passed away 18months ago. Since he died she has been favouring our ds, it got to the point that it was beyond obvious to everyone including our dd and ds. I posted on here for advice and to check what others thought about bringing it up with her. I was a chicken and completely avoided contact with her for 4 months. In the end I did it by text as she had sent me a message asking why I wouldn't allow her gc to see her. In the message I was very kind but firm letting her know that her ds(my dh) would not put up with her favouring one, and that it was effecting my dd etc. Also said that she won't be able to see them until the situation in rectified. She wrote back apologising and saying it is rectified immediately. She did say that she felt like my dd doesn't like her (no shit!) and that due to that she just gave all her attention to my ds. Ds is 13, and dd is 11. I believe she is a narcissist so that explains her thinking. I didn't speak with her about her comment I just left it. Anyway we met up, I told my dd I had spoken to her Gm about the issue. You should have seen my dd she was so happy to have attention and love from her Gm. I would never let her have them unsupervised as she is manipulative, but I think it's important they have a relationship with her regardless as she is still their Gm. Anyway I just wanted to say thank you to everyone that has helped me and given advice. I know we have had an issue with a poster always posting and people spending so much time giving advice for that person to not act on it and just post again and again. I took the advice and used it and our life is better for it, so thank you it is so appreciatedFlowers

OP posts:
FoxesSitOnBoxes · 02/10/2015 02:55

I remember your thread and I'm so pleased that this has worked out for you. Thank you for updating Smile

TheDowagerCuntess · 02/10/2015 03:08

That's fantastic - what a great outcome. :)

quicklydecides · 02/10/2015 03:11

Fantastic, well done you for making a change. And thanks for updating us, we appreciate it I'm sure. Delighted your daughter is happy.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 02/10/2015 03:50

Hurrah! Hope your MIL keeps it up - at least she can't say that your DD wasn't appreciative of the attention now! Well done for acting on the advice, it's so easy for us to tell people what to do from behind our screens, but we don't all have the ability to take our own advice ourselves! So you did really well. Thanks

ValancyJane · 02/10/2015 04:28

I remember your thread, what a nice resolution :)

Mehitabel6 · 02/10/2015 07:03

I remember the thread- nice to have updates. Well done.

Lemith · 02/10/2015 07:20

Well done hun, thanks for the update

diddl · 02/10/2015 07:44

THat sounds like a good outcome.

Keep an eye on it though.

Don't forget that if things get tricky again, rather they have no/very relationship with her than have to endure a bad one.

diddl · 02/10/2015 07:45

sorry, that should be very little relationship.

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