I cant tell if this is something I should just see as a mild irritant or if I am ok if feeling actually a bit fucked off about it.
DH and I have two dcs (11mo and 3.9). He works FT mon-fri (TA so no long days, school hols off etc). I work four days a week (shiftwork inc weekends).
When I work a late I leave the housr at 2pm and get back 11.30pm. In between that time DH picks up the dcs from the CM, brings them home, bathes them gives them supper (cereal, they eat tea with CM)and puts them to bed. They are both always asleep for 7pm. He makes himself some dinner then relaxes/tv/plays on phone til bedtime.
Without fail every time I get home from a Late his dinner things are on the side, the toys are still out on the floor, dds preschool uniform discarded on the couch, the dining table is covered in changebag, his work bag and jacket and pocket crap. The towels used to dry the kids post bath are on the floor or the armchair.
And because he is up and about the next day and off to work and im again on another late I end up dealing with it.
When I leave for a Late ive spent a not insignificant amount of time in the mornings dong laundry, dishes, bed making etc. I cant not touch the stuff he discards as (1) I need it for the kids that day (2) I end up sat in the mess.
I dont even think he has taken the bottles out of ds' changebag that he had at the CMs today and I cant start riffling round to get them as the bag is in DSs room. Ideallytheyd have been washed tonight along with his dinner plate, the dcs cereal bowls and the two mugs that have accumulated over the evening.
Every Late I come back to this and feel cross. Every morning I remember how brilliant he is in literally every other aspect of parenting/living with someone. I mean he is a brilliant guy.
I probably just need to pull him up on this and tell him I expect to come home to a house that was equally as tidy as when I left it.