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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this homework is fucking ridiculous

45 replies

Hurr1cane · 23/09/2015 15:57

Back story. DS has severe learning disabilities as well as some physical disabilities. DS regresses in his learning so doesn't move forward much but it's important to keep him working hard at his own level to keep him at least on an even keel.

DS can't read at all. He can recognise some letters. He can't write, or form any letter, not even ones in his own name. He can't count reliably to 5 and can't count out objects 1:1 at all. He doesn't really understand the concept of number. He is 9 and in a special school. He also has very poor fine motor skills

Last week he got addition homework. Addition to 10, count some tiny pictures and add them up and write the answer.

I complained. Told them it was way above his levels (this is taking the levels off his school report not just me) and told them to either send him appropriate homework or send his targets home and I'd work on the targets. They did the homework at school with him. By did I mean they wrote the answers and DS scribbled over them.

So this week I get his homework and he is to draw a picture of something he likes (he can't draw) and then write a poem about it inside the picture.

I feel like crying. I know he should be able to do it at his age but he can't. Realistically he'll never be able to. He's going to regress and die young and I just want to be able to sit and enjoy doing some appropriate work with him.

OP posts:
bloodyteenagers · 23/09/2015 17:43

I would be looking at other faults they are making. They don't seem to understand his levels and what is acceptable for his needs.
There's a few students in our
School they get homework. This is requested by parents.
Other than that we suggest read a story.
What with physio and the rest of it,
There's generally no time to do homework.

Also contact ipsea.
And if there are a number of failings I would be requesting the
Lea find a more suitable school

LittleMissIntrovert · 23/09/2015 17:47

Please do speak to the school, I can understand why you feel like you do Flowers

My DS1 who is 9 has SEN and his teacher this year is also the senco.

He can do some the homework, as in he knows the answers to the maths questions, but struggles with the English but his writing and spelling are very behind, and she should know this. I help him with his homework a bit, but I want her to see how bad his spelling is. He got a note saying he must write more nearly as she can't read it.

That's why I have seen an occupational therapist, and he has dysgraphia and suspected dyslexia. So they know he struggles.

He knows he should write more neatly, but he can't! So frustrating for him and me.

Original poster
Hurr1cane · 23/09/2015 17:51

Hi everyone. Thanks for all your advice. I've read it all but it wasn't letting me reply for some reason. Hopefully this will work now. I've rang his teacher and they're sending him new homework. I already do all the stuff he enjoys but I kind of like doing the 'homework' stuff with him and sending t back in. I told his teacher that I wouldn't be judging him if DS didn't make progress because that's the nature of his condition. but I would be annoyed if he was set work that wasn't at his level as it will demotivates him.

It's not a supply or an inexperienced teacher. And he does have an EHC. He was one of the first children to have one as it was piloted so it's all set up and as perfect as it can be now so if things don't improve I'll be taking it in and having a big conversation with them.

OP posts:
Pobspits · 23/09/2015 17:51

That's crap. My Ds is almost 9 and NT and would struggle with that tbh!

Go in, talk to the head and tell them how it made you feel.

Original poster
Hurr1cane · 23/09/2015 17:52

Little miss. Have you tried a weighted pencil grip? DS has one and it improves the marks he makes with his poor fine motor skills. They look nothing like letters but are more than just a faint line now, we have circles and dots as well with the weight

OP posts:
Original poster
Hurr1cane · 23/09/2015 17:54

Sorry trying to answer everything. I don't even need work set. I asked last time if he'd just send DSs targets home and I'd work in his homework book on them, that's what was done last year and it was really good for both of us. I do the reading, iPad apps, chalking on the floor, counting toys he's playing with and everything like that already

OP posts:
AspieAndNT · 23/09/2015 17:55

what's a "come to Jesus" chat?

Lowdoorinthewall · 23/09/2015 18:05

Charis of course we look for all children to make progress- it would be so negative and limiting not to. Progress from their starting points. Children with very low starting points are not expected to make progress at the same rate as their peers (as you have had so many jobs in Special Needs I'm sure you have read the progression guidance).

For the OP's DS maintaining his skill levels is progress as it is staving off the regression.

Sub-levels don't even exist any more.

paulapompom · 23/09/2015 18:09

The last special school I worked at abandoned compulsory homework as it was very hard to differentiate appropriately and we just weren't getting it right for the children.

You sound as though you could produce better/more suitable tasks. I think your idea of working towards dss targets is excellent. Would it be very stressful for you to meet with the teacher and produce some modified tasks. For example, the current h/w could be changed to you and ds finding a picture of something he likes in a newspaper or magazine, you can cut and stick together and ds telling you why he likes it, which you could write.

I think it could be done but I am aware I am kind of suggesting that you do a fair bit of the teachers' job.

Whatever you decide your ds won't miss out. It's clear you are devoted to him and do nice things with him.

Flowers x for you

InimitableJeeves · 23/09/2015 18:16

Does the EHC Plan contain specified and detailed provision in Section F? Far too many are really vague and full of wording like "X would benefit from..." and "X will have 1:1, small group or whole class provision" with nothing specified about how much of each he will have. The early EHCPs in particular were, to be honest, often absolutely appalling - come to that, so are many of the current ones. Did you get advice on it? It could be worth asking SOS SEN or IPSEA to have a look at it.

I would suggest that, as a minimum, it needs in it something to the effect that he will be set homework that is within his capabilities. I would suggest asking for an early annual review so that you can discuss amendments.

MyrtleMoaning · 23/09/2015 18:32

Come to Jesus Chat = let me show you the way/light.

OurBlanche · 23/09/2015 19:08

Or 'let me show you the error of your ways' as Exodus is usually mangled Smile

Original poster
Hurr1cane · 23/09/2015 19:20

His EHC is pretty good. I'm pretty fussy, it's good to the point where his headteacher suggested something I didn't want and I told her to read his EHC and she said "oh, they aren't usually that specific" Wink I'll have another read soon. His last teacher was VERY on the ball with their targets etc. Couldn't fault her on that so I'm sure the ones he has from her are very specific and relevant so there's no excuse from there. His new one, to be fair on him, is very on the ball with behaviours.

OP posts:
ErnesttheBavarian · 23/09/2015 19:22

Have you checked that the work they are expecting him to do in school is appropriate?

Original poster
Hurr1cane · 24/09/2015 00:30

Not checked that yet. That's my biggest concern I think

OP posts:
Charis2 · 24/09/2015 00:31

Charis of course we look for all children to make progress- it would be so negative and limiting not to. Progress from their starting points. Children with very low starting points are not expected to make progress at the same rate as their peers (as you have had so many jobs in Special Needs I'm sure you have read the progression guidance).

Yes, all very calm and reasonable LOWDOOR, and totally irrelevant, because it won't be in any way the teachers choice.

O if only teachers were allowed to make calm and reasonable judgements...... not in the real world!

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 24/09/2015 00:57

YNBU. To give him work beyond his level could make him scared of failure.
These teachers either do not have a clue or they are on a power trip, either way its very worrying.

JeanneDeMontbaston · 24/09/2015 01:03

YANBU.

I am 30 (with LDs) and I would struggle. I hope the new homework you got was better.

Brioche201 · 24/09/2015 01:25

I don't know anything a out special needs so apologies if I say the wrong thing ,it really isn't my intention. It seems to me that they are barking up the wrong tree with your ds.from your description it sounds as though he is never going to be able to read and write. Ir aeems
Pointkess and cruel for him to be slogging away at something as tedious as letter recognition and number work? To what end? He needs to do something that is meaningful to him. Maybe choosing pictures to tell a story

Lowdoorinthewall · 24/09/2015 06:49

I am a Special Needs teacher Charis with 15 years experience of both SS and Resourced Provision, including senior leadership.

Your posts are so odd.

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