Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

OH been sacked! I'm going to have to give up my maternity leave aren't i?

42 replies

stateoftheart · 21/09/2015 10:39

36 weeks pregnant and starting ML next week. Found out today he's been sacked for making a mistake, there is probably more to it than that, like trying to cover it up or something.

Anyway, he has only had this job for 5 months, before that it was sporadic agency work for a year. Took him ages to find a decent job. At times I questioned how hard he was actually trying.

I have only been at my job 9 months so only get stat mat pay, which will be £139 a week I think. We can't live on that!!

OP posts:

ImperialBlether · 21/09/2015 11:27

Araiba - you said: why do you need to be on maternity leave if he will be at home to take care of the baby?

Do you REALLY mean this? Do you understand what maternity leave is for?

Original poster

stateoftheart · 21/09/2015 11:31

I don't really know whether he deserved to lose it yet. I haven't spoke to him. My phone speaker doesn't work so we have only text.

He was doing service engineering but has done warehouse, factory and will do anything like that again.

I do not think he did this on purpose, he enjoyed his job and it was a good step above what he usually does. I also know he will try hard and do anything to find a new job. My worry is that the longer it drags and and if he has to take shitty jobs then no he won't be as motivated.

If he became a SAHD he would do a good job and take over all childcare but I don't want that! My job is long hours and can involve late nights so I was planning on asking for pt so I could get a better balance, I wouldn't be able to justify this if he was a SAHD.

OP posts:

NotYouNaanBread · 21/09/2015 11:32

ImperialBlether In an ideal world, maternity leave is for a mother to stay at home with her baby for a year after birth, but if things don't work out that way, to have the father stay at home with the baby is a pretty good alternative.

I work for myself, and I was happily working away in bed with my newborn the day after she was born. Not full time, but I was working, and I went back to work properly pretty early on, leaving her to the tender mercies of DH. It worked out really well for all of us.

We don't know what the OP feels about her job, or how much she earns. If she loves her job and has good earning power, it's not unreasonable to discuss a shortened leave and a SAHD solution.

4 weeks before birth is still pretty much the worst timing he could have come up with, so they have to sort out the next 3 or 4 months right now, as I don't think that the SAHD thing is really workable in the first 12 weeks after birth or so.

araiba · 21/09/2015 11:32

yes, though you cut off the second part of what i said, i didn't mean have baby, go back to work next day.

but it may not be possible to take the maximum allowance if you are the only one with an income

NotYouNaanBread · 21/09/2015 11:34

Sorry OP - I cross posted with you! It sounds like your job isn't a great match for SAHD situation.

Is there any scope for him to start his own service engineering business? If he could start picking up clients fairly smartly, and haunting local classified sites and gumtree, he could be working pretty quickly, so long as he can stay on top of his paperwork etc.

thecatsarecrazy · 21/09/2015 11:41

I feel for you op. I'm not expecting but I have 2 children and your oh sounds very much like my dh.
I gave up my job to be a sahm when he found a job only for him to lose it 3 weeks later. Wasn't his fault but he then spent a year either signing on or doing agency work. He did eventually get a job but he his treading on thin ice always phoning in sick.
You can't be expected to work you need to rest before and after having your baby. He needs to get off his arse. There is work out there if people are willing to do it. I work in Poundland its shit but it pays for our food every week.

Lostlight · 21/09/2015 11:48

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but he is unlikely to get job seekers allowance if he has been sacked. He will be sanctioned for a set amount of time.

I would be on the phone to your bank and arrange an overdraft, if you rent you may be entitled to housing benefit, this is limited and can be paid even if sanctioned. Be prepared for a mountain of paperwork.
Sorry you are facing this. Hugs x

FuckYouBitchImWellClassy · 21/09/2015 11:51

I have a feeling there's a back story here long enough to cover my sitting room. In any case he needs to start applying for anything and everything. Warehouse,delivery driver,supermarkets,fast food places. Whatever is going to put money in the pot.

MultiShirker · 21/09/2015 11:52

Sorry to be nosey, OP, but are you married? It offers quite a lot of financial protection and legal rights to mothers which not- married partners can't take for granted.

If you're not married, Do.Not.Give. Up.Your.Job

And good luck!

lougle · 21/09/2015 11:52

If you were working over 30 hours per week prior to ML then you will still get working tax credit.

Unfortunately, if your OH was sacked for misconduct, he may be sanctioned for the first 13 weeks of his JSA claim.

ENtertainmentAppreciated · 21/09/2015 12:00

I'm sorry to hear this OP. It's not the time now to think back over decisions, you only have a month or so until the birth of your new baby.
Organize everything you can and tell OH that he needs to get something, anything, to start bringing money in to the household. Impress upon him that now is the time to step up.

Prioritize and look after yourself. It sounds like everything's going to be falling on your shoulders, but just do what needs doing for now and think more long term once you're able.

I hope he comes through for you at the very least in the immediate future.

Good luck

milkmilklemonade12 · 21/09/2015 12:06

Get him to sign on with every agency going; Reed are a recruitment agency who specialise in engineering (I am in that sector). Ring the recruitment consultants, ask to speak with them personally, get an email address for them (so not just info@randomagency. com) and get his CV and covering letter sent over. Contracting isn't ideal, but it brings the money in.

If he wasn't trying hard enough before; maybe this will give him the short sharp shock he needs to realise that he absolutely MUST pull himself up now, and that mistakes have serious consequences.

Maisy313 · 22/09/2015 20:50

Hi, sounds really tough and not what you need. Weird question but what area are you in? My dh is an operations director in an engineering company with a big factory floor and he is recruiting at the moment. Message me if you like.

borisgudanov · 22/09/2015 21:09

If he's only been there five months they're at perfect liberty to sack him just because they don't like his face. He would have no recourse to a tribunal until two years' employment, unless it were discrimination. But the benefits agency can still treat him as if he'd been fairly dismissed for some heinous offence. Welcome to Britain

Babyroobs · 22/09/2015 21:23

As PP says you maybe able to claim tax credits when baby is here or get extra tax credits if you already get them. I'm assming your kids dad pays maintainence for them but your dh should be looking for any kind of work to provide for your new baby.

Andcake · 22/09/2015 21:35

Don't give up your maternity leave or even discuss it with him until at least 6 weeks after giving birth. Don't give him any reason to not feel panicked and do everything he needs to do to keep food on the table and bills paid.
Look into benefits etc support him in his job search.

You need that time with your baby ( ideally longer) but if dp has to become a stay at home dad for a while so be it...

PegsPigs · 22/09/2015 21:52

My DH was made redundant when our DD1 was 6 weeks old. Scared the shit out of me but he got one in 2 months so we were OK. I just wanted to say it can work out well and he could get another job before your money runs out. Good luck

Flip

1 2