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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

...to think they could've just given him the chunk of apple?

56 replies

rachelhere · 18/09/2015 17:11

So. I didn't bother to give the £5 'fun money' requested at the start of Year 1. Because I'm tight, and just didn't think it mattered. Turns out it was in fact 'apple money' and he was the only one in the whole class not getting his chunk of apple!! Whyyyy didn't he tell me before? And how mean of the teacher, no? Did they literally throw that chunk in the bin in front of him rather than just giving it to him? Arrggghhh! He has now taken in his 'apple' money. AIBU to think it's just mean?

OP posts:

Georgethesecond · 18/09/2015 17:13

Just mean not to send in a fiver for school funds, you mean?

CocktailQueen · 18/09/2015 17:15

The school is no meaner than you - why should your ds have fruit if he's not paid for it?

But the school should have said it was 'fruit money' not 'fun money'! We're charged £6 per half term for a fruit snack.

TurnOffTheTv · 18/09/2015 17:15

What did you think the £5 was for? Biscuits for the staff room?

Annadina · 18/09/2015 17:16

Very mean of the other parents not to subsidise your tightness.

Theycallmemellowjello · 18/09/2015 17:16

Yes it's mean. They should pool the money and use it for fun' for the whole class - where's the fun in leaving the poorest kids out?

BackInTheRealWorld · 18/09/2015 17:17

But if you chose not to pay that's pretty much saying you dont want your child to have it.

abbieanders · 18/09/2015 17:17

So what would you imagine the point of other parents paying for the apples would be if you were getting them anyway? And was it safe to assume that you wanted him to have apple?

Hillijx · 18/09/2015 17:17

To be fair you didn't pay and I doubt they make a profit out of that money, they probably need it to supply the apples.

TurnOffTheTv · 18/09/2015 17:17

She didn't say she was poor. She said she was tight.

Original poster

rachelhere · 18/09/2015 17:17

But why didn't they say at the start, 'it's apple money, and without it he will be excluded from the daily apple chunk giving ceremony'? Then I woulda given it, god damn it. I needed the info. Thought they'd just be spending it on crayons n shit and the Christmas partay. S'pose it was tight of me. Ok.

OP posts:

Fatmomma99 · 18/09/2015 17:18

sorry, but another one who thinks you were BU to decide you weren't going to pay it without finding out first what it was going to be used for and another BU for wanting to have it anyway for free.

If it's too much money for you to afford (and £5 for a year isn't a huge amount) then talk to the office or the teacher to see if there's any support.

PHANTOMnamechanger · 18/09/2015 17:19

I'm not buying this story, there is more to it or a misunderstanding somewhere.

Most teachers I know subsidise snacks and treats for kids in their class who forget their money/can't afford when there is a cake sale for comic relief etc.

Fatmomma99 · 18/09/2015 17:20

And would you have expected your child to have used the crayons n shit and been included in the Christmas partay without paying for those too?

CrohnicallyAspie · 18/09/2015 17:20

If he is in England then the government provides a free piece of fruit for all infants (up to year 2) for snack time.

Was the 'chunk' of apple for something else, not snack? (Don't know what, a demonstration of maths maybe? Sharing 8 pieces of apple between 4 children to show division?).

abbieanders · 18/09/2015 17:21

So you would be cool with him not having the Christmas party? Why would that be ok to miss if a chunk of apple isn't? I notice you're very keen that we all understand that it was only a bit of apple, but still someone else did pay for it, even if you aren't impressed with the amount.

IssyStark · 18/09/2015 17:22

If you just couldn't afford it and were registered for free school meals (worth doing even if dc are in infants as it means the School gets additional funds and it can make a big difference to what they can do), then you can rest assured, your ds would be getting his apple.

You've said yourself you were just being tight, so school rightly assumed you didn't want him to join in the 'fun' even if it was eating some apple.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 18/09/2015 17:23

You didn't need the info really, you were just choosing to think you needed it.

If you assumed it was for the Xmas party, would you have been happy if they'd left him out of that?

Lurkedforever1 · 18/09/2015 17:24

Yabu. Even if it was for the xmas party or crayons I assume you'd be even more pissed off if he wasn't included in those?
As for those who genuinely can't afford it, I imagine the majority of schools would either use pp if the child is entitled, general school funds or allow it to be payed off £1 a week etc if the parents explained they genuinely didn't have it. They probably just don't make allowances for parents that are too tight to pay it.

Original poster

rachelhere · 18/09/2015 17:27

This is my very first post after lurking on here for years! Thought it was Mumsnet-worthy! I'm loving how scary and earnest it all is when you actually post something
I actually meant the staff Xmas party

OP posts:

Boomeranging · 18/09/2015 17:29

Don't they get free fruit in year1? I know they do...

Isthatwhatdemonsdo · 18/09/2015 17:31

All KS1 kids get free fruit.

CrohnicallyAspie · 18/09/2015 17:32

They have to pay for the staff party themselves. And the biscuits for the staff room (and tea, coffee, juice). Sometimes I'm surprised they still have toilet paper provided free of charge!

Original poster

rachelhere · 18/09/2015 17:36

Well we obviously don't get fruit for free. Am in Wales though. My first Mumsnet post. It is a true story, he told me in the car this morning, followed by a plaintive '...and I love apples.' Oh Christ, I thought.

OP posts:

Pobspits · 18/09/2015 17:37

So basically you didn't actually care what it was for because you thought the other parents and staff would subsidise your son and he wouldn't know any different. Now you've realised that shockingly you really do get what you pay for or don't pay for you've decided to pay? Objective achieved for the school id say!

Boomeranging · 18/09/2015 17:38

Depends on the school management Crohnically. I have worked in schools where tea and coffee is provided and at my current school we have superior loo roll for the staff toilet. IMO little things like that are a very inexpensive way of showing some appreciation for the staff and money well spent. Not all heads are such good managers though

There's nothing in the rules to say the staff party can't be funded out of the school budget either, although obviously if it's spent there it can't be spent somewhere else.

If it was for educational purposes (like quarters) then he should have got the apple whether OP paid or not.

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