AIBU to wonder if men 'marry well'?

[Prole]

I'd never even thought about the concept of marrying 'well' until seeing it here. Marriage for love was my naive belief. Am I right that 'well' is a euphemism for richer?

All the references here seem to be about women marrying well but as the majority of poster are women then it's probably not the full picture. Is as much of a mainly female consideration as it appears?

proles By biology, I mean that we all have assets and we are driven to find the best mating partner. It's why when you meet couples they seem to match in terms of physical attractiveness.

If one person is much more attractive than the other, the other needs to bring something else to the table that the power one values. Often it is looks vs money. Women with looks/ youth and men with money/ power. Sometimes the other way around.

My male friend who married well is very clever and sexy, but is crippled by depressive episodes. His very beautiful wife is a very difficult person, but an extremely successful lawyer. They both work because their looks match but they are both difficult to live with. Therein lies the compromise.

Marrying well has been in my lexicon all my life and my friends range through most of the social classes.

Interesting to consider whether this 'old fashioned' concept of marrying well ever did go away.

In Victorian times and before then it was a well established practice for a man to have to establish himself in a career before the parents of a woman would allow her to marry him. A man had to have prospects. The woman he chose had to be 'of good family'. In some Asian cultures today the practice is very much alive and well.

In the UK it died out to some extent after WWII but I look around and see a lot of men at the bottom of the socio economic pile who will never have the prospect of marriage and family. I think I has made a come back as the economy has deteriorated. I do think in London there are a lot of women who are very much and quite openly on the look out for a wealthy man to marry. Men are still a lot less bothered about 'marrying well' but I think more and more are looking for a woman who will be able to contribute financially because housing is so expensive.

I was watching a thing about longleat and Lord Bath was expected to marry im sure lady bath was hand picked for him that is what i think of men marrying well a woman fit to produce children and present herself in a good way. Lady bath now lives in france most of the timd

I think j was raised with very romantic ideas about marrying for love only, to the extent of not really analysing how the partnership would work. Money and status were definitely not to be considered. That said, dh and I are not penniless or at each other's throats, and in fact he is a successful professional and would probably be considered "posher" than me.

I know men who have married "well", although in the context of religion and having to marry someone who was from the same religion (but also professionally qualified and a good " catch" iyswim).

I have also come across the idea of marrying well among people from a wealthier background, I.e. people choosing potential partners who come from similar background in terms of money and class.

Marrying well could mean marrying someone that meets all of your needs whilst you're not having to compromise on anything.

For some men that will mean a compliant, attentive (and of course beautiful) wife who always puts her husbands needs before her own, happily complies with every request and overlooks his infidelities.
Even nice guys would probably quite like a wife like that! Actually, I'd quite like a husband like that....