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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

'Baggsying' seats before purchasing food - what's the etiquette?

49 replies

DirtyMugPolice · 12/09/2015 13:59

I took ds and his friend for lunch at a high quality eating establishment Mc Donalds for lunch after the cinema earlier. They are both 4 so kept them with me whilst ordering and paying. When looking for a table there were quite a few people who were obviously waiting for a friend/relative to pay for food and bring it over. We had to wait for someone to finish before we could sit down (admittedly not long). Would I have been U to ask a staff member to ask someone to move for me if I would have had to wait a long time for someone to finish? Just wondering really, I don't know if I'd have the guts to do it myself!

OP posts:

ilovesooty · 12/09/2015 14:40

Exactly Sparkling

Glad to see you back

RachelZoe · 12/09/2015 14:45

I always bag a table first, I have only heard of the other way on here. It makes no sense to buy food and potentially stand there for ages waiting.

Original poster

DirtyMugPolice · 12/09/2015 14:46

I was hypothetically BU - I won't feel bad for grabbing a table in future now :)

OP posts:

kali110 · 12/09/2015 14:47

I alwYs sit down at a table wherever we go as i can't stand for long periods.

WhereYouLeftIt · 12/09/2015 14:49

It depends on the cafe.

Most of the cafes we use have menus on the table, so we 'baggsy' the table, peruse the menu, decide what we're having and then one of us will go up and order (or give order to the waiting staff).

Our favourite cafe does not do menus, today's choices are spread like a cornucopia on the serving counter, so there we go to the counter first, ooh and aah, order and pay, and only then look for seats.

ClashCityRocker · 12/09/2015 14:55

See this is my pet hate, as someone who really enjoys a coffee and toastie on my own.

I can be next in the queue, with plenty of spare tables, and in the time it takes to make my coffee, all tables are full. I can understand with kids and elderly, but when it comes to couples, it really irks me. Especially as they get all sniffy if you put your coat on a chair to 'reserve' it, which is just the same thing really.

I've started going at less busy times. Theres nothing worse than being stood in a corner with your coffee and slowly cooling Danish looking like a spare prick at a wedding.

BeautifulBatman · 12/09/2015 14:56

I bagsy. I'm not going to but food unless I know I can sit down to eat it.

ClashCityRocker · 12/09/2015 14:58

Although, of course, if I could do it, I would

dontrunwithscissors · 12/09/2015 15:01

Depends on how busy it is. If it's crammed, I bagsy a table first, even if I'm on my own (coat and a few bits and bobs in the table). When busy, my local cafes ask if you've got a seat before serving you. If it's crammed and loads of people hanging around, I will walk out.

MissBattleaxe · 12/09/2015 17:41

There two very vociferous threads about this not so long ago.

I'm of the "get a table then send one member of your party up to order" school of thought. It's not being selfish, it's being practical. Why on earth would a family of four go and order food not knowing if they can eat it sitting down or not?

On the other hand, I would always budge up and be friendly if a lone stranger had nowhere to sit.

Andrewofgg · 12/09/2015 17:47

If I'm on my own my jacket and book go on a chair, If groups can, so can singletons, and a jacket reserves a seat just as well as a bum.

Doyouthinktheysaurus · 12/09/2015 17:48

I'm firmly in the 'get a table then order' camp too but it seems to divide opinion on MN.

If the cafe was heaving and there was nowhere to sit, I would move on without ordering. The stress of ordering food without knowing I had a seat would do for me

ChickenTikkaMassala · 12/09/2015 17:49

I bagsy a table and my wife gets the food, I can't physically carry a tray etc so that's the way we do it and I don't see anything wrong with doing it either.

fastdaytears · 12/09/2015 17:51

I always thought this was super rude and it does result in tables being taken up where someone could be eating. Drives me mad to see people standing around while people who don't have food get are sat down. But on MN it seems fine so I suspect I'm about a century behind the rest of the country.

Sirzy · 12/09/2015 17:53

I'm not going to get food without knowing I have somewhere to sit first.

FizzyGood · 12/09/2015 17:58

If I've bought food I will take a spare seat and eat my food.

If the only spare seat has a coat or other item on it belonging to someone in the queue I will move it and sit down.

If someone is trying to save the whole table and there is no other spare space I will politely say sorry I need to sit down.

Why would you make me stand up when I'm ahead of you in the queue? By the time you get to the front someone else is likely to have finished and left, leaving a space for you. That's how it works.

thenewaveragebear1983 · 12/09/2015 18:01

Coffee places like costa etc are the worst for this, I guess because people are more likely to linger and also to reorder, but so often there's nowhere to sit and you're left juggling a tray with hot drinks and a toddler, plus shopping bags etc. I've often thought they should design some sort of 'table for one' arrangement, as so often there's just a single person at a twin table (and while I might sit there myself, I wouldn't inflict my toddler on someone on their lunch break!)- but I suppose it would be hard to introduce this without making people feel like total Billy no-mates. In McD's, I always sit the kids down first before ordering.

fastdaytears · 12/09/2015 18:02

By the time you get to the front someone else is likely to have finished and left, leaving a space for you. That's how it works.

That's what I always thought! But MN makes me realise it's not universal. A lot of places round here have a sign up anyway to say no baggsying (not in those words sadly- that would be amazing)

Pipbin · 12/09/2015 18:06

I think it is just you and me left Fast.

I look at it this way. A cafe has 10 tables and is empty. A single person comes in and orders their food at the counter. While they are placing their order 10 couples come in and bag all the tables. The first person is the only one who has actually bought anything but is left with nowhere to sit. This is of course a hypothetical situation but I feel that either way is fine so long as we all play by the same rules. The M&S cafe near me used to have a sign saying that you could only sit down once you had ordered.

MissBattleaxe · 12/09/2015 18:14

You see I wouldn't go to a cafe if I couldn't find a table before getting food.

I would think it ruder (and madder) for an entire family to stand about in the queue and then look round with full trays and martyred expressions when they didn't have a seat.

One of you sits with the kids, one fetches food.

Andrewofgg · 12/09/2015 18:26

A table for one would in practice be too small for a coffee and food. And if circular - very unstable.

yumyumpoppycat · 12/09/2015 18:39

We save a table because if the 5 of us can't sit down and eat we would rather not buy the food there so will go somewhere else to eat. Not practical for 5 people (3 dc and 1 with disability) to stand around holding trays of rapily cooling food and cluttering the aisles causing a fire hazard, prob leading to people at tables feeling pressured to hurry and finish etc.........

yumyumpoppycat · 12/09/2015 18:41

or in other words what missbattleaxe said ;)

helenahandbag · 12/09/2015 19:41

If I'm alone the I put my jacket on a chair and my non-valuables on the table before queuing. I don't understand why someone would queue first, be served hot food and then moan about having nowhere to sit. That makes no sense to me.

Why would you buy your lunch if there was a chance that you'd have to either wait for it to go cold before getting a table, or else be forced to leave and eat it standing up (obviously a sandwich or similar, not a full roast!)?

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