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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Girls' school - mums being precious

35 replies

JumpRope · 12/09/2015 11:32

I've sent dd to a girls school as I personally think girls do better at them and I really want her to get on well with girls - she only has an older brother, as I did, and I think she needs a chance to be herself in her own environment.

I'm wondering if it's normal for mums to be a bit anti-boy at girls schools, however. Many of the pupils in dd's reception class are only children or have just sisters (I am sure if I had a one sex family, I would look more closely at mixed education). I've heard lots of comments about when boys come along to pick up or to parties - girls crying that they are being rough, noisy or chasing and the mums backing it up. One mum even saw the head recently to request boys stay in the cars at pick up time and not walk into school I've seen the boys and girls racing about, but NEVER anyone get hurt.

Aibu to think about looking elsewhere for dd - there is a a school nearby which is more closely aligned with the boys school I think, at least in terms of practicalities and dates etc? She's just started reception. But has done nearly 2 years in the preschool bit.

OP posts:

Carlywurly · 12/09/2015 15:26

I know a couple of mums with dds who are very scathing of boys. I often wonder how they'd have coped with them. It's peculiar.

I went to an all girls school. I wouldn't ever put mine through a single sex school, especially at primary level.

I'd move your dd if this weirdness continues. Otherwise you're embedding some strange beliefs at a very young age.

Turquoisedance · 12/09/2015 15:32

I went to an all girls secondary school and would never send my DD or DS to a single sex school, primary or secondary.

BoneyBackJefferson · 12/09/2015 15:35

The girl's school near doesn't have any mixed activities on site, all co-ed activities are done in the boy's school. this includes extra curricular.

As to whether this is the school's stance or the teachers I have no idea.

Caprinihahahaha · 12/09/2015 17:46

I went to co-ed all the way through and would have happily moved house to send DD single sex.
Ds1 went to a mixed school for two years after starting at a boys school. We actually did move home so he could go to a boys school when he asked us.

It's what we all do. We factor in our own experiences and form an idea of what we want for our DC. It's a personal choice. The being snotty about different choices is a bit weird.
But then people get incredibly weird about special schools too and would foist that on my son if they could.

SanityClause · 12/09/2015 17:54

My DDs went to girls' schools for both junior and senior (although DD1 is now at a mixed 6th form. DS is at a boys' senior school, after being at a boys junior school from 7+.

Many of the girls have brothers at the boys' school (and vice versa, obviously!).

I have never experienced the kind of attitudes towards boys (or towards girls from the parents at DS's school) that you describe.

Weird.

TremoloGreen · 12/09/2015 21:37

I went to girls' schools from age 8. Never came across any of the problems regulalrly cited on mumsnet and my children will go to the same. I find the behaviour of these mothers truly bizarre though.

Shesinfashion · 12/09/2015 22:38

I don't understand why the sexes should be separated at all. They're little humans, welcome to the real world of men and women.

Caprinihahahaha · 12/09/2015 22:54

God yes. Because the world treats men and women exactly the same - especially out in the workplace.

Oh wait...

ScarletRuby · 13/09/2015 04:21

Could you imagine the uproar if this was a boys school and girls were being told they had to wait in the car at pick-up time.

As an aside I went to a girls school and it didn't make me get on well with girls. Quite the opposite in fact, groups of women really intimidate me and now all of my close friends are male.

nooka · 13/09/2015 05:17

I don't think that there is a good case for single sex primary schools. Personally I don't like segregation full stop (and both dh and I went to single sex secondary) but there is a case that girls do better educationally without boys throguh adolescence. I don't think that holds true when they are younger.

So you have to think about the motivations of the other parents in sending their little girls to an all girls primary. For some it clearly is a distrust/dislike of boys, and that's likely to get passed down to their girls and may well be shared around. I'd be a bit concerned that the OP's little girl may be comfortable with girls but not with boys, despite her older brother.

Certainly if the other school works better for your son's term times etc, and especially if later on they do some co-ed activities (lots of girls/boys schools are twinned for more social activities like choir etc) then I think it's worth checking out.

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