to have got the reception application all wrong :-( please help!

[Sobloodyworried123]

We moved to a new area last month so obviously old application was I longer valid ( moved 60 miles away )
Put in an application for son to start school, put 4 schools down, all religious as we are.
Didn't hear anything so on advice from a friend who works for the council for another area advised I ring admissions and request a vacancy list of all schools with places within 5km. That came, not one school listed. They had sent one with a vacancy that was 8 miles away under 10km list and out of sheer panic I contacted the school and asked if they had a place
They said one and I thought it was better than nothing so even though very poor ofsted and distance I added it onto my list of prefernces and was given it on Monday. I emailed accepting it, spoke with the school and son was due to start today. I was unaware if we would be entitled to travel allowance so made an application yesterday.
Go to do the school visit today and it took 1 hour and 20 mins :(
It is going to cost a fortune in petrol, and I also have to factor in the fact I have another son a year younger who no doubt will get a place in our new area and how do I get them to 2 different schools in completely different areas? How do I start a son in year 7 here with one in year 6 there?
Even if they pay the mileage they don't pay for round trips so I would have to wait all day in the schools area which isn't feasible as was hoping to increase my working hours ( currently work evenings )
I have now refused the place, it's too long a journey, if the car breaks down there is no public transport at all leading there and I feel it would be very disruptive as I would move him for a local school straight away.
Time is not on my side as he's 5 in 2 weeks and my sons application needs to be in by jan for next year too.
What can I do now? I have put 6 schools on waiting lists, including all schools within 2 miles and one just slighly over as I could walk to all of these at a push.
Would I have any appeal grounds as only put that school as no schools within 5km? Or because they have given me one of my prefernces it's now job done?
I spoke to them and they have said if no luck on the waiting lists they will look again in January for him when he's at legal age but that's all they've said.
Please offer some advice, I wanted to do the best by him but I really don't think a primary 8 miles away is feasible.

Op lives near Sutton!

Oh sorry my geography of the area is obviously dodgy!!

They now know I have declined the offer, I emailed it yesterday and they replied this morning saying that I will remain on the 6 waiting lists that I've asked to be on and if nothing arises by December to make them aware.
I'm just confused why I can't apply for an in year place now that it's September?

Have a look on the admissions website sobloody or ask the admissions office - but there will be a date when the lists reopen & you can then reapply

Be careful though as this might be starting again from scratch, it is here, but they will have to offer you a suitable place. Check the catchment area criteria carefully & take advice locally if you can as it can be very tricky. Here if one of the schools on our list of choices was outside of the catchment area we fall into - the LA could then offer another school not on our list & out of catchment area - which is what they did - in our case, the worst school in the whole area & much further away

Do double check this is how it is in your area by very carefully reading the admissions booklet/website, but it's very likely the same, I think most are. If you only put catchment area schools on your list of choices, they will have to give you a school, only in your catchment area

I would call admissions at Surrey Cc again. If you applied in July and its now September I think you should be able to apply.
Do make it clear you are looking for a place that your son can reasonably travel to.

If they try to fob you off I would ask what would happen if a place comes up at a reasonably close school but not one of the (only) six they allow you to be on the waiting list for between now and Christmas (and this does happen even at extremely oversubscribed schools)?

But if you are talking to a regular admissions person they should do their best to help. It may take a bit longer as you are close to the LA boundary as they may need to talk to adjacent LAs too.

Don't panic!

I have emailed them asking that, as I'm only allowed 6 so have literally put all 6 within 2 miles ( so that we could walk to school ) however of course would accept one at 2.5 miles etc so seems silly that they wouldn't offer that to me when you know he is without a place

Please don't presume that your closest schools are all in your catchment area'I got caught out with that one - our 2nd closest school wasn't in our catchment area, meaning our LA could offer DD a school a long way from home

Check the website or booklet - there will be a map - the map will gave clearly marked borders for each schools catchment area

He's so young, not even compulsory school age yet. Can't you just keep him at home until you know what school you can pressure through with the sibling rule after his brother is allocated a place? The best education at that age is lots of stories, free play and conversations (plus dressing himself and wiping his own bottom!). Better to do that at home than settle him at a crappy school you won't want to leave him at long-term?

I think you need to have a hard conversation with your favoured RC school about the likelihood of your younger son getting a place. You may stand a better chance of a decent school place for your younger son if you put your closest decent school as first choice.

Surrey don't operate catchment areas, it is based on distance usually after Lac/Sen , religion/parish where relevant and often siblings.

Thanks for your replies.
We don't have " catchment " schools as such, the closest one wasn't on my list however is number 2 on my waiting list after attempting the awful 8 mile drive has shown me how important a local school is to us.
My youngest son will get into the catholic school without a doubt, it's expanding to 90 next year rather than 60, my eldest would have got in had we not been a late admission.
So come next September eldest will be top of the list having a sibling there but won't I have to prove I am home educating etc come january? I'm not sure I have what it takes :-(

I think you're grossly misunderstanding what home educating means.

You are HE ing - well I assume you are. Do you talk to your son? Do you ever count anything together? Or spot bus numbers? Or read to him, or even just let him see books? Do you take him anywhere - including Sainsbury's? Do you ever let him draw? Play with Lego? Run around outside? Talk to his Grandparents/other older people? Discuss concepts like "last summer we went to..." or "in our old house..."? Does he help with cooking? Play with play dough? etc. etc.

Of course we do all of those things ;)
He can count to 50 write his name recognises all colours / shapes / numbers / letters and he talks well can dress himself has been toilet trained for years, he isn't behind in any way and hasn't attended nursery settings.
I just imagine lots of people involved questioning what exactly I'm doing with him etc which would stress me out :(
In an ideal world he would get into a school by January but I don't know how likely that is now, what's worse is that the closest school to us didn't come up on the school search government tool as brand new or I would have put it and probably got it as it was under subscribed due to a lot of people not wanting a new school :( but now it's full with a waiting list

FWIW we HEd in Surrey for three years and had no contact with the council whatsoever - I'd very much doubt there would be any kind of chasing of you, especially since your DS is under 5 in any case.

OP - might be worth seeing whether this thread can be moved to primary education where you will no doubt get an expert along soon.

Home educating a reception year child is nothing like home educating an older child, and it really should be the least of your worries! Especially in the first term where it's all about getting used to being in school, sitting down and listening, going to the loo, finding their peg, lunch times etc. Then starting the very basics of numbers and phonics, and writing which they do very lightly with a massive amount of repetition. Teaching 30 children takes an awful lot longer than any informal, curiosity led little moments you'd do at home eg watch YouTube phonics songs, or CBeebies Alphablocks etc.

Its sounds like you're panicking and looking at it all at once and getting overwhelmed. Break down the problem into bits, then deal with the separate bits one at the time.

Hope it all works out easily in the end.