A wedding one

[slightlyconfused85]

DP and I getting married in December, have invited his cousin and husband and invite says as much. Had a reply today saying that we would all love to come, me husband and our 3 children.
The children are not babies or toddlers and they're not invited because frankly if I invite everyone's children I don't have room for my friends and the venue isn't huge.

I feel awful as if I had room I would gladly invite them but as it stands I cant. I would like to reply saying as much but not sure how to phrase this, or if indeed im being unreasonable and should somehow make room for the children.

I'd give them a ring tbh and prepare for the fact that they might not be able to come

Quick text;

Thanks for your RSVP. Unfortunately, due to restrictions on numbers at our venue, we are having a child free wedding. We hope that you can still attend and apologise for any inconvenience this may cause. We hope you understand,

Best
Bride & Groom

They are trying it on. You need to let them know asap that unfortunately as stated on the invite, due to numbers you are not able to invite the children.

We had the same issues despite addressing to parents only. I would suggest your fianc??e contact them and tell them it's adult only and if that causes any inconvience then you both understand if they have to decline invite. Firm but fair x

YANBU and frankly I think they are trying it on a bit by pretending to misunderstand that the invitation was for them all.

Something simple like:

"So sorry, but owing to the size of the venue we are not able to extend the invitation to children. I do hope that you and X will still be able to make it!"

YANBU personally I would give them a ring and explain that much as you'd like to extend the invitation to include their children unfortunately there just isn't room

If you get declines would it be possible to add the children at a later date?

I agree with lilac. It is fine not to invite children (others will no doubt disagree) but you need to correct the mistake as quickly as possible.

Most people understand guest lists are a nightmare and will understand that you can't fit kids as well. Just call them or pop around in person. Prepare for it to be a bit awkward but I'm sure it'll be fine. If you make room for their kids everyone else whose kids weren't invited will likely be annoyed.

If it was 1 child I might try to squeeze them in but 3 is a lot. Trouble it isn't entirely child free as I have 2 of my own. I have said family children only, and my best friends son to be there to play with Dd. I've had a few objections from friends with toddlers to which I've said if it really means they can't come then their child can sit on their lap but I can't cater for them.
Feeding babies are obviously invited.

Yes if I get declines I could fit the children in.

I have said family children only

This is your DP's cousin, so be prepared for someone saying these are family children.

Unfortunately, there are times when you do need to spell it out precisely.

By family children I only really mean my brothers toddler; there aren't any more!

Toddlers cost me very little and can squeeze on parents laps if necessary. These are 3 older children (youngest 4) so would need seats and food of their own.

Totally txt back with nottheop suggests
Never understand y ppl get so arsey over other ppls weddings. Numbers are limited in most venues so its nu at all!

Just caught its not child free, but that just means id adapt the suggested text to "unfortunately, due to limited numbers we cant accommodate all children...."
Its still up to you which kids u have there!