to ask if it's grim moving up north

[Eugenekrabs1]

I am from the south (England) and have lived here for most of my life. DH is from the north but has lived in the south for many years. We have children who are school age.

Circumstances have changed for us recently and because of this, we are considering a move to H's northern homeland. I'm wondering what other people's experiences of moving their family have been like.

H has friends and family there whereas I (although being welcomed by them) will not have any friends and will need to find a new job. Our kids are not keen to move.

In short, we don't have to move but there are lots of pros to us taking the leap. At the moment I have a list of pros and cons which I will proceed to bore you with....

Pros
Bigger house with little mortgage
Job change for me (something I want)
DH is close to friends and family - lovely for him
Can get a dog (all want one, current house small)

Cons
Taking kids out of schools they are happy in. They will have to make new friends.
Once we sell in the south it is unlikely we will be able to afford to return
No friends/family close to me
Leaving an area I like (but a house that's too small and expensive to extend)
Rain up north

I'd be grateful to hear any tales of similar moves. Is it grim up north or should I just stop being risk averse and make the move?

You will probably be delighted by the good manners of northern people. When I moved from the North,(actually Midlands but their geographical knowledge north of Watford isn't strong) to the South my lack of accent was frequently commented on, plus the fact I wasn't wearing woad.

I actually looked up the rainfall bit because I was curious.

Leeds has 1024mm rain
London (Greenwich Park weather station) has 557mm rain.

Has anyone heard of an umbrella? It is rain, not acid. You can go about your daily life with a bit more rain.

Did you see Tour De France when they showed the rest of the world how bloody beautiful Yorkshire is?

You already know how lovely northerners are because you married one. Move, enjoy a much bigger house, your children will make friends (they do this when they move up to secondary school anyway, meet new people) and you will get a job that you want.

Dunno if im right, but Id have thought there is more of an East/west decide for rainfall than North/south. So london and newcastle would be drier than Wales/the West Country/the Lake District.

Wettest week ive ever known was a week long monsoon holiday in Devon. The rain was horizontal. Over in North norfolk the same week my friend was on the beach in the sun all week.

Devon is known for being lush and green not sunny- it rains all the time!

its not that rainy!! I moved from Glasgow to Liverpool and it feels positively balmy!!

moving from Glasgow to London in the late nineties felt like moving to france weather wise

I'm from Durham and lived there until I was 18 when I moved to London, then Herts, then Bucks. I moved back to Durham with my husband and children a few years back and it was the best thing we ever did.

I made wonderful friends while living in the South and go back to visit. But for us as a family our quality of life is so much better. We live near to the countryside and the Coast, our five bedroom house cost less than our three bedroom house in Bucks. We are mortgage free and have much more disposable income. We both took pay cuts to move to Durham but the cheaper property prices ( and the lower cost of a round of drinks at the bar ) more than made up for that.

Having spent twenty years down South I can make direct comparisons with the North and for me the North wins hands down. With regards to places being grim.........there are places that aren't v nice but you get that down South too. I visited some awful places I the twenty years I lived there. No better or worse than what is in the North East.

Its all relative then Fluffy

Love the north. Love the south west. Love Wales. Love Scotland . Love Berkshire/ bucks. Love warwickshire/ worcestershire. Devon, Cornwall, Derbys, yorks, lancs, northumberland, cumbria .Just love all of the uk and could live anywhere but London. Great for a visit but could not live there.

I'm so lucky that we get to travel around it a fair bit. Don't know the south east and lincs too well.

Salisbury ticks a lot of boxes for me. But yes go for it if you need to be DH family. See if you can rent there and rent your own home then you're not burning bridges if you don't settle.

I've recently moved back up north after 25 years. There are bad areas, but the people are rough diamonds. Bit undereducated perhaps - north is undervalued and underinvested in - but down to earth, very friendly, especially the women, much warmer than you'll find anywhere else in the country. And tough as old boots. I feel like I'm home for the first time ever.

DD2 has lived in Manchester for nearly 7 years and loves it .Partly because ahe is a keen walker and there are so many beautiful accessible areas .Imo Manchester is a much nicer city than Birmingham (near which we have lived for 33 years in a very nice area)Plenty going on there ,We are seriously considering a move to the WhitePeak area (justS of Manchester)to a middling size town like Whaley Bridge .We could buy a similar property to our (4 bed detached) for about £350,000.I.e.at least £150,000 less
The main attraction is the hills and greenery on the doorstep .(we can't afford Warwickshire,which, although green, does not have decent hills)
Schools not an issue for us but I believe they are excellent
Yes your DCs will have to re settle but at primary age is should be fine. .For what it's worth neither of mine still in touch with many primary friends,but still see lots of secondary friends(though they have both moved away)
It does rain more though .

A friend moved to Manchester a few years ago for work reasons and has settled in well as has his family.

There are plenty of nice places in and around Manchester. Probably fewer Manchester United smug glory seekers too, compared with the south of England.

Is it grim down south, OP? If not, then it won't be grim up north either. We generate our own grimness. Or not, as the case may be.

Anyway.

Don't go and live on your DH's family's doorstep. You won't be able to make your own life. Find somewhere that suits your family. Wherever it is, it will be an awful lot closer to DH's family than you are now, and that may well prove close enough after a while. Maybe also choose with an eye on transport links for visits to/from your own family & friends.

Finally, renting out your own house sounds like you're not committing. Buy, or don't go.

Is stoke oop north or the midlands?

Op, how old are your DC? If they are primary school age they will be fine. Many families move several times when their DC are young and they adapt very quickly. When your DC go to secondary school they will have to make new friends anyway in a few years time. If you tell your DC that moving is a big adventure and they can have bigger bedrooms etc they won't be thinking about missing their friends so much. I suspect that your DC are picking up your fear and anxiety about the move.

I moved out of London 18 years ago and would never move back again. I've visited Manchester (along with all the other major cities in the UK) many times and think it would be a great place to live. Do yourself a favour and stop worrying.

Manchester is not that Northern. It's closer to the middle of the country

Ffs. generalise a whole town and to spell it's name incorrectly

"LuluJakey1

Depend where you are talking about. Bits of Birmingham are supposed to be horrible- but that is the Midlands not the north. I think the North starts in Yorkshire. Middlesborough is pretty yuck. But mainly the North is great. "

Yes. MIDDLESBROUGH is yuk.
[http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-31228650.html]

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-50687705.html

There are good and bad areas in every town. It would be like saying London is yuk because there are some bad areas there.

Rant over.

monkey I've just been looking at the ones on the Grove one can but dream.

I think the North is better off without ignorant twats who think it's 'grim'. I think the thread title was a bad choice of words and hopefully it's not what you actually meant.

If you go with the 'grim' attitude it will be a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you go with an open mind you'll find there are fab places to live and you'll be welcomed by friendly Northerners.

Just like the South, there are areas of the North that are not so appealing but there's a massive list of reasons that so many people feel that in the North they are 'home'.

Up north says no thanks.

When we win the lottery eh cucumber

The 'grim' thing was clearly tongue in cheek.

Such sensitivity!

Monkey - sorry to offend. I think of Nunthorpe and Stokesley as being North Yorkshire even though they are near Middlesbrough. You'd have to admit lots of it round the city centre isn't great.

There are areas of Newcastle I would not want to move to but the city itself is lovely and there are so e really nice suburbs. I think Middlesbrough city centre isn't good at all. Good places outside it though. But I suppose it is just individual likes/dislikes.

Saying its grim up north is so jumping on the bandwagon thinking they are funny.

It is beautiful up north. You get a lot of house for your money compared to down south. Lots of welcoming people.

It's beautiful down south. You can get a lovely house for your money in some places. You can meet friendly lovely people.

Lol at uneducated northerners .

Maybe she's a fan of The KLF.