the name game

[snoozeyoulose]

I have a dd who is 16months. through out my pregnancy I had two names picked for my future son/daughter. I told a close friend my choices and she liked them. Cue the birth of my daughter and I chose the girl's name i'd picked. chatting to my friend after my dd's birth I mentioned that i'd love to use the boy's name should I ever have a son. Lo and behold my friend who is now pregnant and due in December has picked the boy's name i'd had my heart set on. would anyone else be a bit miffed about this or aibu? i'm fully prepared to be told that aibu and I know that it's hardly a MASSIVE problem....i'm just a bit ticked off.

You're allowed to be annoyed, those are your feelings.

Is she definitely having a boy?

She's picked a name for a child that she's definitely having in December, but you would rather she didn't so that you could use it for a potential child who has not even been conceived yet and might not even be a boy? And you know for sure that she had never heard this name before you mentioned it to her? You can't help how you feel, but YWBU to mention it to her.

And there you have just learned one of pregnancies valuable rules.... DONT TELL ANYONE YOUR NAMES UNTIL YOUR CHILD IS BORN

Besides, YAprobablyBU because by the time you have your next child, you will have undoubtedly changed your taste for names.

Fairyfeatures I think I just learned that lesson the hard way look I know I'm being a little bit unreasonable but when someone says that they liked it as soon as I mentioned it you can't help but be a bit annoyed? Would anyone else not find that odd?

Im stuck in the middle of two friends with this problem at the moment op, friend A had her baby and called him the exact name friend B was planning to call her baby in 6 weeks time. Friend A knew Friend B wanted this name too as it has significant meaning to her..

I know they say don't tell anyone your names before baby is born and we have stuck to that, however- if I had a pregnant close friend I would probably tell her the name we had picked out and had our heart set on- so if she had her baby before me and stole it I had it on record that I told her I wanted to use it and don't expect me to change my mind on it.

I suggest you do the same op- if you do have a son- just call him what you had your heart set on, you did tell her you were using the name!

You may never have a boy to use the name.

If we are talking anything in about the top 300 I think you accept it with good grace.

If it is very, very rare I might be a bit miffed and would point out that I'd still use it.

Is it an unusual name OP?

No not that unusual......it was Lucas.

I'm just a bit disappointed that after hearing me go on about it for months she's decided that it's now the name for her. I feel like shouting GET YOUR OWN IDEAS!!

Nothing wrong with feeling miffed, wallow for a few days then move on and forget it.

FWIW even if you do have a boy later, you might well pick a different name for him then anyway. I know 7 or 8 people's unused, opposite sex names for their firstborns, and not a single one wasused for a later child. That includes our own daughter's "boy's" name, which we loved from day 1 but just didn't feel right for DC2.

I understand why you're miffed, but I think you should let it go over time. And as PP said, never, ever discuss your choices with anyone other than DH until you've named your baby.