If you're actively suicidal then you need to seek help. Let's just say that first.
To learn to desire to live? Tiny increments, good pain management. Reclaiming parts of the day at a time.
You need a combination of things to turn to (apart from people). When I was ill I used to watch comedy shows, long films, mini series - anything to manage the time I actually had to connect with the pain.
It's not necessary to have to stay in the moment all the time - you can still mindfully avoid the present feeling and choose to visit somewhere else for a short while (like a film for example)
The problem comes from expecting too much. All that being hard on yourself, I want to accomplish lots is very tiring when you can just make a cup of tea, put a load of washing in and that's you done for 90 minutes.
Really small hobbies that you can do for ten minutes. If you're well enough to go out a trip to the garden centre/library can feel like a massive accomplishment.
I'm not sure if you're up to joining things but it's out there when you're ready.
If you feel totally uninspired and totally disinterested in life I'm sure you know that's a large part of depression. So if you were depressed then you may need medication (if therapy didn't work for you)
So the day is in 3 sections, tackle each part individually. Most people are best in the morning once they get moving and get their pain manager so do the thing you want to do then.
Then the afternoon is for something else (decent lunch/films/cinema?/with friends). Evening you will be with your family.
I don't want to sound like an idiot by suggesting Pinterest, but there's literally thousands of tiny projects on there to distract you.
None of its going to make you want to live if you're depressed or suicudal though.